Raphael

Let's Get Practical #3: Raising Self-Esteem

238 posts in this topic

27/07/2021 (Week 27)

If I think about becoming better friends with my child-self...

  • I'll let my child-self express himself
  • my child-self would feel closer to me
  • my child-self would feel more comfortable with me
  • my relationship with my child-self would improve
  • my child-self would talk to me
  • my child-self would like me more
  • my child-self would show more playfulness

If I think about becoming better friends with my teenage-self...

  • my teenage-self would finally feel understood
  • my teenage-self won't be ashamed to express his emotions
  • my teenage-self would communicate with me more
  • I'll give my hand to my teenage-self
  • I'll stop shaming my teenage-self
  • I'll embrace my teenage-self

As my younger selves become more comfortable with me...

  • they trust me more
  • they communicate with me more
  • they express their emotions more
  • I can help them more
  • I'm becoming more authentic
  • they are becoming more authentic
  • I feel more whole
  • I feel more integrated

As I create a safe space for my child-self...

  • my child-self feel safer
  • my child-self feel better nurtured
  • my child-self can express himself safely and freely
  • I'm growing
  • I'm deepening my relationship with my child-self
  • my child-self is showing himself more
  • my child-self feels trusted

As I create a safe space for my teenage-self...

  • my teenage-self feels safer
  • my teenage-self feels that he can open up
  • my teenage-self feel more understood
  • my teenage-self trust me more
  • my teenage-self feels relieved
  • I'm deepening my relationship with my teenage-self
  • I'm becoming stronger and more integrated

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28/07/2021 (Week 27)

If I think about becoming better friends with my child-self...

  • he would express his curiosity
  • my child-self would show himself more
  • he would express his needs
  • he would be more comfortable with me
  • he would ask for help
  • I'll give him help
  • I'll do the best that I can to understand him

If I think about becoming better friends with my teenage-self...

  • I would let him do things by himself
  • he would show up
  • he would feel more comfortable with me
  • he would show how mean he is
  • he would cry in my arms
  • he would show how much he is hurt
  • he would communicate with me
  • I would help him

As my younger selves become more comfortable with me...

  • they are showing up more
  • they are trusting me more
  • I start to feel them
  • I start to understand them
  • I am deepening my relationship with them
  • we are starting to heal together

As I create a safe space for my child-self...

  • he feels more secure
  • he feels protected
  • he feels that he can trust me
  • he may be see this safe space as a prison
  • I realize that this safe space is may be too much
  • I understand that he wants more freedom
  • I understand that this safe space is overprotective
  • I understand that my child-self wants to get out of this safe space
  • I understand that I'm protecting my child-self too much and that this is hurting him

As I create a safe space for my teenage-self...

  • he feels controlled
  • he doesn't like to feel controlled
  • he wants to go out
  • he wants to express all his dirtiness
  • he doesn't like me
  • he doesn't trust me
  • he wants to do things by himself
  • I understand that I need to stop controlling my teenage-self
  • I understand that my teenage-self is wise enough to do things by himself
  • I understand that the best thing that I can do to my teenage-self is to let him be free
  • My younger selves don't want safety. They don't like safety, they feel overprotected, they feel over-controlled, they feels like they are in prison. What they want is complete freedom.

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29/07/2021 (Week 27)

If I think about becoming better friends with my child-self...

  • I'll accept my child-self more
  • my child-self would accept me more
  • I try to understand the struggles of my child-self
  • I'll become more honest with my child-self
  • my child-self is opening more
  • my child-self is trusting me more

If I think about becoming better friends with my teenage-self...

  • I'll allow my teenage-self to express all his emotions
  • I'll give my teenage-self the support that he needs without over-controlling him, nor spoon-feeding him
  • my teenage-self is getting motivated
  • my teenage-self wants to prove himself
  • my teenage-self is opening up to me
  • my teenage-self is becoming courageous
  • my teenage-self is trusting me more

As my younger selves become more comfortable with me...

  • I become more comfortable with them
  • our communication gets better
  • our relationship gets better
  • we are working better together
  • we are doing better together
  • we can trust each other in dealing with life's situations

As I create a safe space for my child-self...

  • my child-self don't feel safe but oppressed
  • I understand that my safe space needs to be properly balanced to provide enough safety without over-controlling my child-self
  • this safe space allows my child-self to express himself fully and safely
  • my child-self is trusting me
  • my child-self starts to feel safe without being oppressed
  • my child-self is appreciating me more
  • my child-self feels in security

As I create a safe space for my teenage-self...

  • my teenage-self doesn't trust me because he feels over-controlled
  • I understand that this safe space needs to protect while at the same time being as minimal as possible to allow my teenage-self to have a lot of freedom
  • I understand that a balanced safe space is what my teenage-self needs more
  • my teenage-self is starting to trust me more
  • my teenage-self feels that he his free to express himself wherever he wants while still feeling safe
  • my teenage-self is becoming more and more authentic
  • my teenage-self is loving me more and more
  • my relationship with my teenage-self is skyrocketing
  • my communication with my teenage-self is skyrocketing
  • my love for my teenage-self is skyrocketing

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30/07/2021 (Week 27)

If I think about becoming better friends with my child-self...

  • I'm becoming more open with my child-self
  • I'm becoming more playful with my child-self
  • my child-self would trust me more
  • my child-self would express himself to me
  • my child-self would share with me
  • my child-self would embrace me

If I think about becoming better friends with my teenage-self...

  • my teenage-self would feel more comfortable with me
  • my teenage-self would open up to me
  • my teenage-self would feel an emotional connection
  • I'll understand my teenage-self better
  • I'll understand my teenage-self needs
  • I'm becoming more integrated

As my younger selves become more comfortable with me...

  • I become more comfortable with my younger selves
  • we become more vulnerable
  • my younger selves enjoys more and more my presence
  • my younger selves are becoming more peaceful
  • they become more honest
  • they are opening up emotionally
  • they are expressing themselves more and more

As I create a safe space for my child-self...

  • my child-self feels safe only is this safe space is minimal
  • I'm becoming more healthy
  • my child-self feels protected
  • my child-self is trusting me more
  • my child-self feels that he can express himself in safety
  • my child-self is appreciating me more

As I create a safe space for my teenage-self...

  • my teenage-self doesn't want it
  • my teenage-self feel safe only if I keep the safety as minimal as possible which then allows him to have freedom
  • my teenage-self starts to trust me
  • my teenage-self is getting some courage
  • my teenage-self is getting more motivated
  • my teenage-self is expressing himself more and more authentically
  • my teenage-self feels safe

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31/07/2021 (Week 27)

If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I...

  • create a balanced safe space for my younger selves that allows them to feel safe without feeling oppressed and at the same time allow them to have a lot of freedom
  • give help to my younger selves
  • nurture my younger selves
  • am kind to my younger selves
  • become genuinely interested in my younger selves
  • give love to my younger selves
  • encourage my younger selves
  • let go of judgments of my younger selves
  • support my younger selves

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01/08/2021 (Week 27)

If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I...

  • rebuild the connection with my child-self
  • rebuild the connection with my teenage-self
  • listen to my younger selves
  • give the love that my younger selves needs
  • create a safe space for my younger selves without over-protecting them which gives them the freedom to express themselves
  • trust my younger selves
  • love my younger selves

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02/08/2021 (Week 28)

Mother gave me a view of myself as...

  • a good boy
  • a very intelligent person
  • a strange person
  • a head in the clouds person
  • a beautiful person
  • a handsome person
  • a dependent person

Father gave me a view of myself as...

  • a dumb person
  • a weak person
  • a shy person
  • a incompetent person
  • a weird person
  • a not normal person

Mother speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

  • that I'm very intelligent
  • that I can do good
  • that I forget things, therefore, cannot do stuff
  • that I'm very incompetent and dependent on others
  • that I look good
  • that I'm strange

Father speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

  • that I am weak
  • that I am shy
  • that I'm going to fail
  • that I'm going to be incompetent forever
  • that I'm not social
  • that I'm an idiot
  • that I lack confidence and self-esteem

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14 hours ago, lxlichael said:

@Raphael Integration work is difficult. Keep going.

Thanks.

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28 minutes ago, Raphael said:

Thanks.

Np. Your journal is helpful to many people here in unknown ways to them and you, great work.

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03/08/2021 (Week 28)

Mother gave me a view of myself as...

  • a good person
  • a smart person
  • a beautiful person
  • head in the cloud person
  • a baby
  • a anot normal person

Father gave me a view of myself as...

  • a dumb person
  • an incompetent person
  • weak person
  • shy person
  • a baby
  • a not normal person

Mother speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

  • that I can do good
  • that I'm very intelligent
  • that I'm a dreamer
  • that I'm not normal
  • that I need to care about others
  • that I'm great

Father speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

  • that I am dumb
  • that I am incompetent
  • that I am socially awkward
  • that I can't succeed in life
  • that I'm not enough
  • that I'm terrible
  • that I cannot communicate with people
  • that I cannot be myself
  • that I am a failure

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04/08/2021 (Week 28)

Mother gave me a view of myself as...

  • a good person
  • a smart person
  • a beautiful person
  • a baby
  • a helpful person
  • a useful person

Father gave me a view of myself as...

  • a dumb person
  • a weak person
  • an incompetent person
  • a dependent person
  • a baby
  • an abnormal person
  • a failure

Mother speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

  • that I'm very intelligent
  • that I need to help others
  • that I should not push myself too much
  • that I should not push myself too much outside my comfort zone
  • that I am good
  • that I look good

Father speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

  • that I can't succeed
  • that I won't succeed
  • some insults
  • that I am not good enough
  • that I am weak
  • that I am a failure
  • that I should push myself
  • that I should push myself outside my comfort zone
  • that I am shy
  • that I should not be shy
  • that I don't care about others
  • that I only care about myself
  • that I am the most important thing in my life

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05/08/2021 (Week 28)

Mother gave me a view of myself as...

  • a smart person
  • a head in the cloud person
  • a good looking person
  • a good person
  • a helpful person
  • a baby

Father gave me a view of myself as...

  • an incompetent
  • a weak person
  • a dumb person
  • a dependent person
  • a useless person
  • a lazy person
  • an abnormal
  • a fragile person

Mother speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

  • that I am smart
  • that I need others
  • that I am good looking
  • that I can help
  • that I am helpful
  • that I'm lost in my head

Father speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

  • that I am weak
  • that I am incompetent
  • that I am dumb
  • that I'm fragile
  • that I'm incapable
  • that I'm lazy
  • that I'm shy
  • that I need to push myself harder
  • a lot of insults
  • that I'll never achieve anything in life
  • that I'll never succeed in life

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06/08/2021 (Week 28)

Mother gave me a view of myself as...

  • a good boy
  • a kid
  • a good looking guy
  • an intelligent person
  • a strange person
  • a head in the cloud person
  • an innocent person
  • a kind person
  • a good person

Father gave me a view of myself as...

  • a dumb person
  • an anxious person
  • a shy person
  • an incompetent person
  • an abnormal person
  • a dependent person

Mother speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

  • that I am good enough
  • that I can do it
  • that I am smart
  • that I am good
  • some reassuring stuff
  • that I am exceptional

Father speaks through my voice when I tell myself...

  • that I cannot do it
  • that I am stupid
  • that I shouldn't be how I am
  • that I need to push harder
  • that I need to make more efforts
  • that what I do is never enough
  • that I need to change
  • that I'm not enough
  • that I'm an idiot
  • that I can't change
  • that I'm incompetent
  • that I cannot succeed
  • that I should not listen to people

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07/08/2021 (Week 28)

If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I...

  • let go of negative aspects of my mother
  • let go of negative aspects of my dad
  • embrace the positive aspects of my mother
  • embrace the positive aspects of my dad
  • unite the kindness and supportive personality of my mom with the visceral strength of my dad
  • orient myself more and more towards positive self-talk

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08/08/2021 (Week 28)

If any of what I wrote this week is true, it might be helpful if I...

  • let go of negative self-talk from my father self
  • let go of negative self-talk from my mother self
  • embrace the qualities of my mother self
  • embrace the qualities of my father self
  • think more positively
  • support myself through my mother self
  • take ruthless actions through my father self

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09/08/2021 (Week 29)

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my mother...

  • I'll be more respectful of my mother
  • I'll mock my mother less
  • I'll bring more joy to the relationship with my mother
  • I'll become more connected to my mother
  • I'll know my mother better
  • I'll feel closer to my mother
  • I'll have more empathy for my mother

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my father...

  • I'll try to talk to my father
  • I'll let go of fear of my father
  • I'll assert myself with my father
  • I'll get closer to my father
  • I'll understand my father better
  • I'll stop judging my father
  • I'll have more empathy for my father
  • I'll appreciate more my father
  • I'll see the good in my father

If I look at my mother and father realistically...

  • I know that they aren't good or bad
  • I know that they are doing everything that they can
  • I know that they love me
  • I understand that they suffer a lot
  • I understand that life is challenging for them
  • I become more aware of who they are

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship to my mother...

  • this level of awareness is quite low
  • I see that I don't make that much efforts to understand my mom
  • I see that my relationship can be improved
  • I can improve my awareness
  • I know that by improving my awareness I can improve my relationship a lot
  • I know that I need to pay more attention when she speaks

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my father...

  • my awareness is very low
  • I notice that I have difficulties keeping my awareness high
  • I see that I need to do some efforts
  • I see that a lot of fear is preventing me to be aware
  • I understand that my father doesn't know me because I don't bring any awareness to our relationship
  • I know that I can make a lot of progress to increase the awareness of my relationship with my father

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10/08/2021 (Week 29)

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my mother...

  • I'll be more attentive to how I talk to my mom
  • I'll let go when some things annoy me
  • I'll politely say to my mom to stop when she speaks too much
  • my relationship with my mother would improve
  • I'll have a better emotional connection with my mom
  • my mom would appreciate me more
  • my relationship with my mom would improve

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my father...

  • I'll try to talk with my dad
  • I'll be more open with my dad
  • I'll be less afraid of my dad
  • I'll accept my father more
  • I'll have more empathy for my father
  • I'll get a bit closer to my father

If I look at my mother and father realistically...

  • they are doing the best that they can
  • they aren't bad people
  • I can learn from them
  • I can see myself in them
  • I can learn about myself by learning from them
  • they are just human beings

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my mother...

  • this awareness is pretty low
  • this awareness isn't sufficient to maintain a high-quality relationship
  • I can improve this awareness
  • I need to let go of things
  • I see that I need to be more attentive when relating to my mother
  • I see that I hurt my mother many times because of the low awareness that I bring to the relationship

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my father...

  • this awareness is very low
  • I know that I can make some progress with my dad
  • I see that I need to make some efforts
  • I see that I can unstuck myself
  • I see that fear is preventing me to be aware
  • I see that I need courage
  • I see that I can grow from healing the relationship with my father

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11/08/2021 (Week 29)

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my mother...

  • I'll be more respectful of my mother
  • I'll accept to help my mother
  • I'll put boundaries when my mother is asking too much from me
  • I'll let go of my annoyance when interacting with my mother
  • I'll have a healthier relationship with my mother
  • I'll have a deeper connection with my mother
  • I'll have more fun with my mother

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my father...

  • I'll let go of the anger that I have towards my father
  • I'll understand that I am afraid of my father
  • I'll try to talk to my father
  • I'll stop judging my father
  • I'll have more empathy for my father
  • I'll be able to heal the traumas related to my father

If I look at my mother and father realistically...

  • I see that they aren't bad people
  • I see that they do the best that they can
  • I see that they love me
  • I see that they don't know me
  • I see that they have difficulties relating to me
  • I understand that the difficulties that they have relating to me are difficulties related to generational differences and different educations

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship to my mother...

  • this awareness is low
  • I see that I can bring more awareness to my relationship with my mother
  • I see that I'm afraid of sharing my vulnerabilities with my mom
  • I see that I can make a lot of progress to our relationship
  • this lack of awareness comes from my fear of being vulnerable
  • I need to be aware of my awareness

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my father...

  • this awareness is very low
  • this awareness only focus on the negative aspects of my dad
  • this awareness dismiss the positive aspects of my dad
  • my fear of my father corrupts my awareness
  • my awareness is corrupted by my past traumas
  • this awareness can be improved
  • I see that my fear is irrational

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12/08/2021 (Week 29)

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my mother...

  • I'll be more conscious of how I speak to my mom
  • I won't take seriously my mom's jokes
  • I'll listen more to my mom
  • I'll accept my mom more
  • I'll give love to my mom
  • I'll be more vulnerable with my mom

If I bring 5 percent more awareness to my relationship with my father...

  • I'll have more empathy for my dad
  • I'll try to understand my dad
  • I'll be more conscious of the difficulties of my dad
  • I'll understand that my father did the best that he could in his life
  • I'll forgive my father
  • I'll let go of resentment of my father
  • I'll try to talk to my dad

If I look at my mother and father realistically...

  • They aren't good nor bad, but just how they are
  • They do the best that they can with what they have
  • They are disconnected from me because they have different backgrounds and because they grew up at different times
  • They aren't that bad
  • They are good no matter what
  • I see that they care about me
  • I see that they love me
  • I see that they are doing the best that they can

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my mother...

  • this awareness is low
  • I see that I don't care enough about my mother
  • I see that I can improve this awareness
  • I see that by improving my awareness my relationship will improve
  • I see that by improving my awareness I'll become more connected to my mom
  • I'm choosing to improve my awareness

If I reflect on the level of awareness I bring to my relationship with my father...

  • my awareness is very low
  • my awareness is clouded by fears
  • my awareness is low because I keep holding on to the past
  • I know I can improve my awareness
  • I know I need to focus more on the present moment while interacting with my father
  • I know I need to talk to my dad
  • I know that I can start by talking in front of him to start raising my confidence
  • I know that by talking to my father and healing our relationship my confidence will raise, my self-esteem will raise, and overall my personal development will skyrocket

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