I Want To Stop My Sexual Thoughts

[Marks199]

Hello people, if someone is looking at my topics he will notice that I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder but I also wanted to tell you that when I start to think about erotical thoughts I sometimes masturbate and get sad because I haven`t got a girlfriend yet and I am 21 years old I have never touch a girl seriously I want to learn how to stop thinking about sex. Because I am handsome, I am muscled and I speak like 5 languages but it seems like useless I don`t understand where the problem with me is... I work as much as I can with me and I am going trought this problem copletly alone with a mother that is always sick and nervous and closed minded father and uncle. So has anyone an idea how stop these thoughts?

[Yukise99]

I have another thread that is similar to yours 

Also this one as well

For example for me, the reason I value losing my virginity is to keep the same pace as my friends and to feel like I have some value of who I am as a human being. What do you think is the underlying issues with your masturbation issues? I feel the same way at times, which is why I find porn a bit distasteful nowadays since I'm not in it LOL 

 

Try to love and love yourself and appreciate who you are as a person. You need lots and lots of love and I'm sure that you are the perfect person to give it to yourself. We need love to grow, and when we can't get it from another person we need to get it from ourself. Our self-image does not stem from the fact that we have a girlfriend, a house or a lamborghini. Our worth and values are unlimited and I truly believe that you need to see this in yourself. You might value yourself at a certain number based on what you have or don't have, but the deeper truth is that you're so much more than where you work or what you have. You are love. And I think that once you start practicing to love yourself, you will start to find peace and love inside yourself.

Now this is easier said than done, considering I feel the same way as you do. But what's important is for us to practice loving ourself and appreciating who we are as a person and be grateful for the things in our lives and work towards the things we want. 

Edited June 28, 2016 by Yukise99
added links

[Andre]

@Ivansmarks The harder you try to stop the thoughts, the more they will penetrate your mind, Let them flow freely, Accept that you are a sexual being and there is nothing wrong with you, and really there isnt anything wrong with you, Women wont tell you this but they want sex more than men do,,, They are crazzy(in a good way) but they hide their sexual side because they are scared of being judged as a slut, etc.

[charlie2dogs]

20 hours ago, Ivansmarks said:

Hello people, if someone is looking at my topics he will notice that I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder but I also wanted to tell you that when I start to think about erotical thoughts I sometimes masturbate and get sad because I haven`t got a girlfriend yet and I am 21 years old I have never touch a girl seriously I want to learn how to stop thinking about sex. Because I am handsome, I am muscled and I speak like 5 languages but it seems like useless I don`t understand where the problem with me is... I work as much as I can with me and I am going trought this problem copletly alone with a mother that is always sick and nervous and closed minded father and uncle. So has anyone an idea how stop these thoughts?

is someone forcing you to think these things, is someone twisting your arm,  all you have to do is focus on something else beside sex, this is not rocket science, you have programed yourself with these thoughts until they are rooted in your consciousness, now you will have to unroot them by giving a certain amout of time to focusing on something more constructive, and not keep going back to the thoughts, there is no other solution to this,  it may help you to record some constructive audio files and put head phones on and listen as much as you can for a few days.  its going to be harder to get rid of it than it was to create it,  you created it unconsciously now you will have to uncreate it consciously.

[Allinthemind]

At your age, hormone levels etc. thinking about sex is quite normal, enjoy your fantasies. Managing your sexual desires (through masturbation) is far better than suppressing it. These thoughts won't just stop even if you were in a relationship. Masturbation triggers your sadness, but it is not the cause of your sadness. 

Keep interacting with people and the relationships will follow.

[JustinS]

@Ivansmarks Start meditating to grab hold of a stronger sense of awareness. I would definitely recommend you to try the Do-Nothing Meditation technique. This has worked for me as I had obnoxious amounts of sexual thoughts. I learned that these things are completely natural and shouldn't be suppressed with any ounce of shame. 

This technique allows you to spend some time sitting and basically just spacing out and letting whatever thoughts come, arise and fall, without the intention to interfere with anything. By letting the horny monkey out of it's cage, so to speak, allowed me the space needed for these things to be exhausted out. Trust me, I've thought about some crazy creative shit, but then still,...they pass. Keep doing this everyday until the horny monkey gets it's attention it most desires from you and it should balance out quite well. 

[Fello]

Don't stop them.. Express them :-) 

[Marks199]

Thank you people....

[CuteCornDog]

On 6/27/2016 at 1:01 PM, Ivansmarks said:

Hello people, if someone is looking at my topics he will notice that I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder but I also wanted to tell you that when I start to think about erotical thoughts I sometimes masturbate and get sad because I haven`t got a girlfriend yet and I am 21 years old I have never touch a girl seriously I want to learn how to stop thinking about sex. Because I am handsome, I am muscled and I speak like 5 languages but it seems like useless I don`t understand where the problem with me is... I work as much as I can with me and I am going trought this problem copletly alone with a mother that is always sick and nervous and closed minded father and uncle. So has anyone an idea how stop these thoughts?

Interesting.

[Marks199]

On 6/28/2016 at 8:36 AM, Yukise99 said:

 

And I think that once you start practicing to love yourself, you will start to find peace and love inside yourself.

 

And I think that once you start practicing to love yourself, you will start to find peace and love inside yourself. How to practice it? I know meditation and chess and visualization. Do you have any more?

[Yukise99]

There are a couple of good books on the subject, check out Louise Hay stuff and I forgot what the tittle of the book but it's about spontaneous love. How to heal your life is a pretty good start. It's different for everyone but I think loving yourself means that accepting that you are enough and that you don't have to try so hard in life to be able to love yourself or receive love. This is different from being complacent because here we are in a state of acceptance rather than stagnation.  

[Christian]

The thing is that you assume there "is a way" to stop these sexual thoughts. There is not. There is NO-SELF controlling your thoughts. It is not an ability you have or will ever have. 

But you can gain awareness over these thoughts and stop them from causing stress/sufflering. Meditation daily is great for that...

Good luck  

[Richard Alpert]

On ‎27‎.‎6‎.‎2016 at 8:01 PM, Ivansmarks said:

Hello people, if someone is looking at my topics he will notice that I suffer from generalized anxiety disorder but I also wanted to tell you that when I start to think about erotical thoughts I sometimes masturbate and get sad because I haven`t got a girlfriend yet and I am 21 years old I have never touch a girl seriously I want to learn how to stop thinking about sex. Because I am handsome, I am muscled and I speak like 5 languages but it seems like useless I don`t understand where the problem with me is... I work as much as I can with me and I am going trought this problem copletly alone with a mother that is always sick and nervous and closed minded father and uncle. So has anyone an idea how stop these thoughts?

You cant stop those thoughts and stop labeling those thoughts as bad. They are normal. I would suggest you to start nofap, that is a good way to learn to control sexual energy plus there´s a lot of other benefits from it