Girlfriend Wants Kids, I Don't Yet

[PlayOnWords]

So my girlfriend really wants to have kids in the next year or two and I imagine that my stance on it will not change that soon. I think I do want kids someday, but only once I'm at a sufficient level in my personal development journey. I have dreams and goals, that may not even become a reality but I have to try. She already has a child and a disability which she says is influencing her decision to have babies sooner rather than later, which I respect. However, I don't want to be forced into something like this. Maybe 5,6,7 years down the line but not now. I have way too far to go. 

We had already kinda decided to end it about a month ago, but I told her maybe we can find some common ground and compromise. Last night she told me how it's making her really upset that I'm not in the same boat as her, and though she's tried to put her desire at bay, it's not happening. She said she thinks we should break up soon as this is very serious for her, but she doesn't want to and neither do I. 

I'm very upset too and quite angry at her, though I also completely understand what she's saying. 

Is it over? 

[Hello from Russia]

How old is she?
If that is indeed that much serious for her, I would respect her and move on, the most noble thing you can do. I wouldn't try to convince her to "surpress" her desires nor would I suggest compromising your values and goals in life too.
What do you want? If you want kids soon aswell, you can try to negotiate with her and make it in 5 years or so but only if you want it and only if you want to be with her for a very long time

[Austin Actualizing]

Never a good idea to rush having kids. It's a big responsibility and if you aren't developed enough it can be detrimental to the child. If that is the deciding factor with her, then it would be best to move on even though it's going to sting. 

[Peo]

Just say this to her:

There are like 7.5 billions of people on this earth, do you really think we need to produce more humans. We have more then enough humans here on earth, it would be overkill if we produce more small humans. We can go ahead and have some children, when humanity is about to face extinction, maybe they will be humanity last hope.

If my gf ever gone have this discusion with me, i will just use this argument every time.

 

[dinone]

16 minutes ago, Peo said:

If my gf ever gone have this discusion with me, i will just use this argument every time.

Go ahead have argument with woman who want kids. She will leave you, soon she find new candidate. Your logic is fine. But love is fuel for this world, not logic.

[PlayOnWords]

@Hello from Russia she's 22. It's her physical health that is the crux of the issue. But also I do think she is seeking some sort of salvation through having more children. She has even said in the past she would have a sperm donor baby if necessary. I do really want to be with her, she's gorgeous and we share a lot of values and way of life etc. This baby thing is just a really annoying sticking point. 

[Peo]

@dinone I know, i was just kidding.

[Aeris]

56 minutes ago, Peo said:

Just say this to her:

There are like 7.5 billions of people on this earth, do you really think we need to produce more humans. We have more then enough humans here on earth, it would be overkill if we produce more small humans. We can go ahead and have some children, when humanity is about to face extinction, maybe they will be humanity last hope.

If my gf ever gone have this discusion with me, i will just use this argument every time.

 

 

and there is a lot of girls that knows that having kids is only a pure egoic need.

the most egoic thing you can do.

think of it, Donald trump had a mother, tell her about this.

not having kids it's increasing your chances of not having a baby Hitler.

 

___

 

I m 25, male, I don't see why people would want a kid in this world.

Probably a brain disease or living in total delusion.

when you live in pure truth, having kids right now is the last things you wish to do.

 

 

Edited October 16, 2019 by Aeris