Chumbimba

How to let go of my Ex

9 posts in this topic

I broke up with my ex last month and have been doing a lot better recently, but I still have dreams about her. I told myself that I never want to talk to her again so I blocked her on everything. She emailed me saying I owe her money and She Dms my friend on Instagram saying she wants her copy of think and grow rich back and her sleep mask back.

I really don't want to give them back because I want no contact with her what so ever, but a part of me still misses her and are keeping her things for control purposes. I'm still so angry and hurt about her getting with another guy behind my back and then telling me that when I leave for Spain she is going to find intimacy elsewhere. Then every time I am doing really well and moving forward strong she contacts me and I get set back a little. From blocked numbers, email or through my friends. What should I do? If I am being immature let me know. This is the best way I know how to cope from my addictive past relationship.

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Also I'm leaving for Spain next month and I know I will be home free once I get on the flight lol. Just trying to make it until then.

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@Chumbimba I think you will be alright. It will take time from the deep healing. I won’t say it will fully go away but once the break up starts. Block her number, delete her on social media, and NEVER LOOK BACK. It’s gonna hurt like hell man but time will heal. Work on yourself and ask yourself what you learned from this relationship and how you will be different next time.

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Posted (edited)

she'll give up eventually if you hold no contact

she needs to feel that you've truly moved on

don't let her feel like she can get to you again

Edited by d0ornokey

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I know, it can take time for things to heal.

If you haven’t already, get out there and find something to keep focussed on, perhaps something new.  Find something to grow with, such as a new activity.  It doesn’t have to be a new job or career.  Mine was playing keyboards in a band, a jazz band, for the first time.  A fully enjoyable experience!  In that way, you will also meet new people along the way, not necessarily a new girlfriend, but it will open up to a wider circle of your life and experience, and maybe, you might discover a new talent that you never had before.  It worked for me.  :)  If you want to get ‘angry’ by staying conscious (though if you are conscious, it doesn’t matter one way or the other) where no-one gets hurt, that is one way to do it, especially when she hears that you have suitably grown since she left!  :D

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@Chumbimba just give her back her money and her stuff and move on. "Don't get even, get ahead". 

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I have avoided dealing with my ex in order to avoid pain.  To me that is not "always doing the emotionally difficult thing" as Leo puts it in One Rule For Acing life.

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@SFRL I feel that I just don’t have it right now to give her. It’s a lot of money lol

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