The battle between heart and the self (fear)

[Charlotte]

I just had the opportunity to practice some serious meditation during a 6 hour tattoo. Oh my goodness what a learning curve. I kept my eyes shut the majority of the time and I noticed that 'pain' is in awareness, my arm was no longer an arm. The 'pain' was just a sensation, as is thoughts, they are also in awareness, so is my face, others face and voice and everything ?

[Shin]

Yes, a good pointer would be that everything is just content or information in your awareness.

[Charlotte]

@Shin its ABSOLUTELY magnificent

[Shin]

2 hours ago, Charlotte said:

@Shin its ABSOLUTELY magnificent

Like you ?

[Charlotte]

@Shin what you after?

?

[Shin]

2 minutes ago, Charlotte said:

@Shin what you after?

?

I'm sorry but if you didn't understand this, you need to check your brain for brain lesion

[Charlotte]

No I did understand. It was a joke reply. Nevermind. 

Take it you haven't sorted your sleeping routine? @Shin

[Shin]

1 hour ago, Charlotte said:

No I did understand. It was a joke reply. Nevermind. 

Take it you haven't sorted your sleeping routine? @Shin

I've gone to bed at 0:30 and woke up at 5:30, so there is progress

[Charlotte]

@Shin Oh no yeah that's heaps better! Well done Shin! You must be shattered though with like 5 hours sleep ?

You will sort it. You know what to do ??

[Shin]

7 minutes ago, Charlotte said:

@Shin Oh no yeah that's heaps better! Well done Shin! You must be shattered though with like 5 hours sleep ?

You will sort it. You know what to do ??

No, I usually need 6,

I'm not a bearwomen.

[Charlotte]

@Shin @Shin ?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

?

[Shin]

24 minutes ago, Charlotte said:

@Shin @Shin ?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

?

 

[KyleR]

On 20/02/2019 at 6:01 PM, Charlotte said:

My next plan is to do an actual mushroom trip, not a physical trip ?

@KyleR  how was your trip?

London was interesting, the acid more so, brighter trip than the last one tho! Gotta get that psilocybin in ya Charlotte?

[Charlotte]

@KyleR Will have to update me Tuesday... Arrive a little earlier so you can update me in private? ?

Oh definitely bro, already planning the location ?

[Charlotte]

[Charlotte]

Found myself thinking about the friend I made in Madeira. She hasn't contacted me in 2 days, I think I still become egoically attached to people as sometimes it can cause suffering. 

Is this low self-esteem?

Insecurities?

I have definitely a million percent radically increased my alone time (naturally) in the past year or so but something is definitely still lingering. 

Also found the most perfect trip location. 

By a little stream, 5 minutes drive from my house with as little light pollution as possible. 

[KyleR]

On 22/02/2019 at 8:33 PM, Charlotte said:

@KyleR Will have to update me Tuesday... Arrive a little earlier so you can update me in private? ?

Oh definitely bro, already planning the location ?

Will do intrigued to hear more about that tattoo! Looks mint. Your trip location an overnight stay thing? Never tripped outdoors can imagine it’ll be magical, although I’d hate to go under?might get on it over the summer. What dose you planning to have? Don’t really know what’s what with shrooms tho in that regard

 

[Charlotte]

@KyleR Yeah it's under the stars and right outside the hut thing there's a picnic bench, it feels right. Drove past in yesterday and went "Oh yeah! Forgot these where here!" 

I have no idea with dosage yet, still researching. 

Glad you enjoyed your time in London

[KyleR]

You need a sitter??I just know that Terence McKenna said 5grams will sit you with the aliens so be careful??

[Charlotte]

@KyleR I was literally explaining that to mum yesterday about a sitter but I couldn't think of anybody who could handle the situation. Yeah definitely no heroic doses yet ? start small, gain respect and trust and work my way up.