Confused with where I am on the Spiral

[Jack River]

Just now, Joseph Maynor said:

I was projecting my own shit onto him when I was going through some enlightenment issue I can’t remember now.

Oh.. lol

It’s all good dude. He has said his job is to take take hits yet not record them. Maintaining awareness through relationship is his thing. 

[now is forever]

35 minutes ago, Ampresus said:

@now is forever I don't want to be identified with any groups in my school. Cool kids, gamers, smokers, all not me. I am me. Not a group. I have a little bit of some, but can not seem to completely fit in with any group. Cool kids simply aren't the kids I want to hang out with. They push people to do things for them, expect you to be 100% like them and when you are different they abandon you. I don't want to end up in a group like that. I want to be me and if that means no cool kids then so be it. 

I used to really be in the gamer group, but the kids there are way too harsh and unnecessary racist with their jokes. Many times they would insult my old religion or religions in general. Cool kids aren't far from different in that sense, but just have more self-confidence than gamers. And then they ask me how I get to talk with so many girls even though they sit in their chair for the entire day eating biscuits and laughing to stupid jokes. 

Since I started reading books I officially don't belong to any group. 

exactly, that’s what i mean  sorry for the wording it’s so outdated it’s a cool kids with „“. i have a different definition of coolness.

you try to do your thing, you try to be real.

Edited November 19, 2018 by now is forever

[Jack River]

@Ampresus the self clings to what is familiar to it. Or that self reacts to what is familiar and chooses in another direction it’s opposite. 

We tend to see as we understand ourselves that we are a bundle of memory’s. We cling too or react to that content of memory. We see that the self and what it identifies with, is basically that of the past(thought content). 

[Ampresus]

28 minutes ago, now is forever said:

you try to do your thing, you try to be real.

@now is forever I heard that if you want to build up charisma you have to be real, so here I am.

[bejapuskas]

@Ampresus Hey buddy, I am in a very similar situation, I am just 1 year older, living in Czechia and Christian... My parents are also quite strict with religion, my grandparents are even more strict, but you need to understand, that dogma is very strong weapon and they are using it against themselves, without knowing it. Be more open and compassionate, your style of thinking is still quite blue/orange. Be careful not to turn Actualized.org into another religion  Happened to me... You dont need to just look at Leo and do whatever he does... He is a very inspiring man, I wish i could swap lives with him - thats why I listen - but sooner or later, you will have to think on your own  I dont know if this is still your problem, but I learn this about myself when speaking with my more developed friend... He was waiting for me to realize it  

EDIT: Have you watched Leo's latest video? I think that it is very helpful, it answered many questions to me and I think it is basically handmade for people like us... You need to differentiate between stage, state, line and type of development and also all the independent variables, life isnt just about the Spiral....

Edited November 19, 2018 by bejapuskas

[brugluiz]

On 19/11/2018 at 1:22 PM, Ampresus said:

@brugluiz You mind giving examples of love and fear in Yellow and Orange? 

Orange:

Love: a father who hustle to give his son the best education.

Fear: a woman who does plastic surgery in order not to lose her husband.

Yellow:

Love: a Graphic Designer who give his/her best to meet the expectation of his/her client by using Fibonacci code.

Fear: a philosopher who doesn't want to hang out with his/her friends because he/she thinks socializing is a waste of time.

[Angelite]

At first,I don't wanna advice you because i am myself not really a good muslim nor wise, at all. Haha if I were to do that, I'm going to tell you yo, why play victim? Why can't you stay true to yourself regardless of everything else? Why need other's approval. You're only tryin to convince yourself. When i was 14 blah blah~~

 

But,

I am currently reading through this and it reminds me of your concern. 

 

From Ibn Ata Allah Al-Iskandari.

195

He knew that [most of] His slaves are not self-motivated

in seeking Him; so, He obligated for them obedience to Him.

He pushed them towards Him with the chains of obligation.

Your Lord is amused by a people

Who are pushed to Paradise in chains.

 

196

He has obligated you to serve Him but in doing so

He has only obligated you to enter His Paradise.

 

I think this wisdom is for muslims who are practicing but couldn't see the logic/understanding/wisdom behind every obligation in islamic rulings. 

 

Just so you know that God loves you, and there's a reason & wisdom behind every Islamic rulings. It will benefit you if you follow sincerely & with knowledge.(and you can always find it's wisdom if you were to think about it, just think about it, or look for it online). But remember, you need to learn the right version of islam that comes from the prophet Muhammad saw: Quran & hadeeth.

But first, you need to purify yourself from judgement & attachment. Only then you can differentiate which one is true and which one is skewed. Don't be bias, be smart. And learn a lot while you're still young. You can learn everything that you've mentioned above.

14 years old is not a kid anymore. You can have your own mind while still being respectful to your parents. You don't have to prove anything to anyone(if you are really being truthful to yourself). But be smart, or else you're  gonna missed something really valuable, be it from your parents, or from anyone else. 

It works for me back then, it might not work for you so don't follow my advice. Do as you wishes. Being rebellious is fine. But remember, be smart about it.

Don't do something that you'll regret later in your life. Make sure you're free from biases.

One more thing, you can always learn from other's experiences. And it's good too, to learn things the hard way to have a confirmation and a peace of mind on things that you don't believe when others tell you something.

When I was 14, there are things which i'd rather learn it the hard way than having to do something that doesn't make sense to me haha.

Next year will be your most fun year, my advice is, be smart about it. Don't put yourself into unnecessary troubles. Goodluck.

 

*don't turn this into something bad either* be good to your parents. But be smart too.. don't put the blame on anyone. Do as you wishes, and bear the consequences of your own action. Have fun exploring. Be smart tho..

Edited November 23, 2018 by Angelite

[Ampresus]

9 hours ago, Angelite said:

But first, you need to purify yourself from judgement & attachment. Only then you can differentiate which one is true and which one is skewed. Don't be bias, be smart. And learn a lot while you're still young. You can learn everything that you've mentioned above.

@Angelite Purifying myself from judgement & attachment, thanks for the advice. I should basically just think everything through and not do something what I could regret later in my life.

[Angelite]

I had found my answer in this wisdom recently, and i think you can relate too, 

 

from Ibn Ata Allah Al-Iskandari , (p31)

192

When you are confused about two matters, 

follow the one harder for the lower self.

For only the rightful duty seems hard for it.

 

Finish the basic first.

If it feels hard, that means there's something that you haven't learn , and you need to go through it first.

And grow from it, you can't simply skip it or else there will be a missing piece in your development. And it will affect your life forever until you finally  learn it. haha it's unavoidable. Start from the hardest thing in your current moment,one thing at a time. Then it will get easier. 

Have faith in God. & God will guide you with His Mercy.

Edited November 24, 2018 by Angelite