Green Women vs Orange Men (difficult to go further)

[RaZor47]

Been trying to transition to higher stages of the spiral after watching Leos spiral dynamics mini series. I am a very strong orange person and i think i was that basically my entire life (dad was strong orange person and mom was strongly blue). At the current moment i am exploring Green and one very weird thing that i noticed is that the majority of Women are stuck in Green and the majority of Men are stuck in Orange (even tho i live in Germany now, most guys seem to lean towards orange still). It is very difficult to shake things up a bit. I think this whole Green Women and Orange Men dynamic is self sustaining and its difficult to break it in social situation. Can someone provide any tips. Should i forget about mastering green maybe  

Edited September 22, 2018 by RaZor47

[martins name]

Try loving kindness meditation that way i think that you will experience the appeal of green first hand.

[Leo Gura]

@RaZor47 What does it matter what other people are?

Do you.

[RaZor47]

Yeah, but they dont seem to respond to that

[Leo Gura]

@RaZor47 Be grounded in yourself. Let sheep be sheep.

[eleveneleven]

18 hours ago, RaZor47 said:

Been trying to transition to higher stages of the spiral after watching Leos spiral dynamics mini series. I am a very strong orange person and i think i was that basically my entire life (dad was strong orange person and mom was strongly blue). At the current moment i am exploring Green and one very weird thing that i noticed is that the majority of Women are stuck in Green and the majority of Men are stuck in Orange (even tho i live in Germany now, most guys seem to lean towards orange still). It is very difficult to shake things up a bit. I think this whole Green Women and Orange Men dynamic is self sustaining and its difficult to break it in social situation. Can someone provide any tips. Should i forget about mastering green maybe  

There are many ways to enter Green, and you'll just have to find your own (if you want). As someone who resisted Green for a long time, all I can say is that it really clicked when I stopped judging and objectifying myself, and when I realized that I indeed had feelings (but could not access them). Connecting with feminine people and trying to understand their perspectives helped in this regard, since they tend to have a more nurturing energy.

Orange is a stage of owning up to ones shit and taking responsibility, but often it can go too far and become judgmental and too calculating. It's easy to blame people for things that are not their fault in Orange. This is part of the dissonance between Orange and Green.

I would start by trying to bridge the gap between you and these women the same way you do with anyone in any other stage: discuss things in terms of direct experience, instead of concepts. Talk about how such-and-such thing feels to you or talk about your experiences as literally as possible without editorializing, judging, or turning it into an opinion. Do things that are not useful (draw a shitty picture, write a shitty song) and show them to the stage Green people. Get personal. Stage Green at its best is about radical honesty about your feelings and being vulnerable.

To someone deeply entrenched in Orange, that vulnerability is scary, but it's the way to connect with Green people, women especially. To a person in Green, an Orange person can seem fake, artificial, robotic, soulless, or like they're putting up a front. Think of a used car salesman. When I was deep in Orange, I didn't think I was any of those things, but eventually I realized that I could have easily come off that way because these were coping mechanisms to dismiss my emotions, which I saw as useless distractions.

So I guess I would just say to get curious and try to connect on Green's level.

[Mu_]

Lol at the title.  Haha love and kindness.

Edited September 23, 2018 by Mu_

[RaZor47]

I somehow managed to connect with women through silence, at least from my point of view i think i did. I also realized that i have a very strong love for enduring, which was a very weird realization for me. I think that is what gave me a very strong Peace of Mind. This is the only way i can frame it atleast. Does anybody had something similar? Am i normal? Seems normal to me 

Edited September 24, 2018 by RaZor47

[Shin]

On 22/09/2018 at 3:57 PM, RaZor47 said:

Yeah, but they dont seem to respond to that

You live your life for you, not for anyone else expectation.