Starting to go through the Dark Side of meditation

[Magnanimous]

Hey so after adding Maha Mudra to Supreme Kriya Pranayama, I'm already experiencing the Dark Side of Meditation after less than a year of kriya, and I haven't been doing it that consistently either. 

It's bringing up horrible past memories and crappy feelings but I know it'll all go away one day. I'm just wondering when can I get an idea of when it'll pass?

[B222]

If you can be still during those moments and see from the observer without getting involved with the mind and bodies melodrama you’ll eventually be able to process them easier.
It’s can be difficult when all this past shit comes up but we have to let it be, resisting will just keep them buried which is obviously not good. “Feel it to heal it.” It will get easier and less intense the more you just accept and let them be in meditation, and eventually they shouldn’t bother you at all. 
A good book is “The untethered soul” by Michael A. Singer that goes into the workings of the mind and body, energy, etc 

[Inliytened1]

20 minutes ago, Magnanimous said:

Hey so after adding Maha Mudra to Supreme Kriya Pranayama, I'm already experiencing the Dark Side of Meditation after less than a year of kriya, and I haven't been doing it that consistently either. 

It's bringing up horrible past memories and crappy feelings but I know it'll all go away one day. I'm just wondering when can I get an idea of when it'll pass?

Have you done self inquiry yet? What type of meditation are you doing? I don't understand this dark side unless you are talking about its surfacing some buried shit.  But that's good.  Push through it. You need the ego to fully dissolve

 So that shadow shit won't matter. 

Edited Sunday at 10:25 PM by Inliytened1

[Magnanimous]

@Inliytened1  I have not done self inquiry yet

I do Kriya Yoga from Santata Gamanas books

Any idea how long until this shadow shit will go away. I'm only 19 I don't need the ego to fully dissolve I just wanna know how long until I can expect the shit that's surfacing to go away. Also any tools to help me process what I'm going through?

[manuel bon]

The more you try to push something away the more it comes back, same if you want to skip this difficult period. If I were you I’d keep doing the practice and evaluate whether it’s what I need right now or not. When I was going deep into enlightenment work, I started feeling bad, and I was trying to push through. Then with time I understood that my body was telling me I was not ready yet, and so I went back to normal meditation and lighter spiritual practices. I’m 25 and I got into this work early like you, and even though I was drawn to it, deep down I knew it was a bit too early, and I had to grow in other areas in my life, which will later let you go deeper into yourself and spirituality 

[Inliytened1]

8 hours ago, Magnanimous said:

@Inliytened1  I have not done self inquiry yet

I do Kriya Yoga from Santata Gamanas books

Any idea how long until this shadow shit will go away. I'm only 19 I don't need the ego to fully dissolve I just wanna know how long until I can expect the shit that's surfacing to go away. Also any tools to help me process what I'm going through?

You're gonna have to go through it.

But something might happen too

 

[Michal__]

It's important that you practice more than normally, not less.

That way you can go past dark night to equanimity fast and after that towards a fruition aka first permanent level of enlinghtenment.

[cetus]

17 hours ago, Magnanimous said:

Any idea how long until this shadow shit will go away. I'm only 19 I don't need the ego to fully dissolve I just wanna know how long until I can expect the shit that's surfacing to go away. Also any tools to help me process what I'm going through?

There is no exact answer to how long it will take. Nobody but you knows how much past trauma you have stored up. But best not to resist it when it does come to the surface. Deal with it head on and move through it. Any resistance will only make matters worse. So have compassion for yourself as you go through the process. If you feel the need to cry, by all means do so. Let it out. Ball your eyes out if needed. Whatever it takes.

Think of it this way. It's a lot like cleaning out a closet that has been collecting a bunch of junk over the years. You're going to need pull everything out and make a bit of a mess in the process. But once it's done, you'll realize it was all well worth it.

Visualization exercises can also help speed up the process. Start with your earliest memories and visualize each one and how you felt at the time. Then see yourself in the act of throwing it away.

You can even write down all the surrounding circumstances about the event that you can remember in as much detail as possible. Then hold that memory in your head as you hold the paper in your hand. Then light the paper on fire outside by a fire pit or something similar. Watch as the paper burns and turns into smoke and ashes along with trauma it caused. Verbally say out loud, "I am now completely free from the trauma of this event. It has no power over me. My mind will never be a slave to it again".

Best of Luck!

Edited 16 hours ago by cetus

[Magnanimous]

@cetus in the moment when it comes up, how else should I deal with my dark emotions and thoughts coming up? Aside from non resisting it of course

[cetus]

@Magnanimous  Focus on your breath.