If genetics determines us so much, why self-help?

[StaraX]

9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

It takes a lot of work to make the most of your genetics.

@Leo Gura

If I have shitty genetics, what's the point of making most of my genetics?

 I'm just showing my frustrations. I've read close to 100 self-help books on growth mindset, positive psychology, and the inner game over the past 5–6 years, but they mean very little when reality hits you hard.

For instance, there are a shitload of books that tell you how to ace high school and college and get good grades. Despite working extremely hard and working on my mindset and all that, the results of that effort weren't even close to those of my friends. This is just one example out of many. In pickup and dating this is very visible as well. 

If 80–90% of your health is determined by your genetics, why do so-called nutrition scientists rarely mention this?

Why doesn't society just tell us the truth? Is it only because it's so painful? That's ridiculous. It ain't gonna solve anything.

 

Edited 8 hours ago by StaraX

[Carl-Richard]

@StaraX But have you tried brain training?

[Natasha Tori Maru]

23 minutes ago, StaraX said:

@Natasha Tori Maru You just proved my point 

But how do you determine those constants and know them for sure? 

[oOo]

Genetics is a means to an end, and the end is personal growth. 

The competition describes the context, which changes from life style to lifestyle. 

If your personal growth is around increasing peace in your life, this question wouldn't plague you.

Thus your personal growth is likely centred in another area at present.

To me, this is actually an exciting opportunity for you@StaraX, as it means you're about to make a personal leap in distinguishing self-worth, where your personal growth centres around your own unique path, from societal conditioning where your self-worth is tied up in comparisons and performance metrics; very stage orange like - spiral dynamics.

Every stage in life has its own unique challenges and opportunities, and this is just a small bump in the road for you; in a weeks time or so you'll be able to look back at the emotional lessons you took from this enquiry and apply it to other life areas, helping you solve them more than you otherwise could have. 

Embrace this challenge honestly, appraise your emotions and other experiences with integrity, there's no need to deny what you're experiencing as its a learning experience like any other. My recommendation is not to make convincing yourself of a black/white judgement on this issue, but instead use it as an opportunity to trust your own unique learning curve. This same trust will be the very self-trust that makes the very query itself, redundant unless otherwise genuinely supportive of your life path. Best wishes.

[Lucasxp64]

On 08/08/2026 at 0:35 PM, StaraX said:

 "it's-all-genetics"

• It's all about the physical constraints of the universe
• It's all about the conditions of this planet, it's cosmic and geologically lucky history and our moment in time (A few billion years too early and you get eaten by a dino, too late the sun has destroyed the atmosphere)
• It's all about not being in chains as a slave
• It's all about not having a debilitating illness
• It's all about a nuclear weapon not dematerializing our body
• It's all about not having a car accident and not having brain damage
• It's all about not being abandoned as a child in a literal dumpster
• It's all about having the genetics of a functionally viable human, not of a fruit fly, a dog, or any other animal or living being of this planet, having physical, legal and monetary freedom.

Edited 1 hour ago by Lucasxp64

[Lucasxp64]

7 hours ago, StaraX said:

@Leo Gura

If I have shitty genetics, what's the point of making most of my genetics? [...] the results of that effort weren't even close to those of my friends. [...] Why doesn't society just tell us the truth? Is it only because it's so painful?

Bro, you're alive in the in the 21st century, you are functionally enough to be able to read and  write in english, you have access to the internet, you're not a slave in literal chains.

You're ahead of literally over 99.9% of all humans that ever existed, and you are comparing yourself to "your friends"?

Why don't we all compare ourselves with Jeff Bezos and Elon Musk?

Most of mankind died as a child, if they survived, they were raised as illiterate peasants and would die of Infectious diseases like malaria. 

Edited 1 hour ago by Lucasxp64

[Lucasxp64]

My point is that this a very finicky perspective from an epistemological perspective, you can slice up this problem in so many ways, if you slice it just at the wrong angle you make yourself feel miserable... If you slice it just a bit to the side, you will be dancing naked on the beach with overflowing joy. This is a losing game.

Even specifically what you're saying about "your friends getting more". Why are you so bothered? There are people outside of your circle that literally just turn on a camera and shake their butt to a camera and they get paid millions, why are you not comparing with them instead and being jealous of their butt?

YOUR FRIENDS ARE "LOSERS" COMPARED TO JEFF BEZOS. THE CHANCES THEY CAN BEAT JEFF ARE WORSE THAN WINNING THE LOTTERY. (I might be wrong with this, if I'm wrong, you're actually lucky to have such friends, network with them)

I'm saying this because those are questions that I asked myself as well, again, this is a losing game those comparisons and this is defeatism.

EVERY SINGLE DEFEASTIST IDEOLOGY OUT THERE USES THE SAME TALKING POINTS.

They take something that you can't change easily and they project that as the only source of all of your problems, just to distract you from actually minding your own business.

---

JUST ASK MORE SPECIFIC QUESTIONS. IF YOU ARE NOT SPECIFIC ENOUGH WITH YOUR QUESTIONS AND YOU USE BROAD GENERALIZATIONS LIKE THAT, THAT WILL DESTROY WITH YOUR ABILITY OF DISCERNMENT.

What specifically do you even know about your friends? Do you even care about what they care? Don't use the same measurement stick to compare bananas with oranges.

Edited 48 minutes ago by Lucasxp64