How do you lock a woman in to where she isn't thinking about anyone else but you?

[LordFall]

Just now, Inliytened1 said:

And as we spoke before I don't think you were OK with another guy caressing her and going inside her. But. Correct me, if I'm wrong.  

I was indeed not into polyamory at that time correct. Once again big difference between open and closed polyamorous relationships. 

[Inliytened1]

8 minutes ago, LordFall said:

I was indeed not into polyamory at that time correct. Once again big difference between open and closed polyamorous relationships. 

Understood.   The science and beauty behind polyamory and love co-existing lies in a deep mutual understanding between two partners deeply in love, to know that sex with other partners bears no emotional commitment but is empty. With full devotion being towards their primary lover.

Edited 4 hours ago by Inliytened1

[LordFall]

11 minutes ago, Inliytened1 said:

Understood.   The science and beauty behind polyamory and love co-existing lies in a deep mutual understanding between two partners deeply in love, to know that sex with other partners bears no emotional commitment but is empty. With full devotion being towards their primary lover.

That's one version of it. Another version of it is a polycule. So you have 2 girlfriends but nobody else sleeps with others outside of the relationship. Or more than 3 people. The whole idea is to not let society define how you can love someone. That is between you and the people you choose to live with. 

Once again we're back to sexual shame but there is nothing really that infuriates me further then that. If some man really tried to put boundaries on my love life I would have to kill him. If I lived in a muslim society I would start a revolution almost inevitably. 

[Inliytened1]

14 minutes ago, LordFall said:

That's one version of it. Another version of it is a polycule. So you have 2 girlfriends but nobody else sleeps with others outside of the relationship. Or more than 3 people. The whole idea is to not let society define how you can love someone. That is between you and the people you choose to live with. 

Once again we're back to sexual shame but there is nothing really that infuriates me further then that. If some man really tried to put boundaries on my love life I would have to kill him. If I lived in a muslim society I would start a revolution almost inevitably. 

Well you being bisexual I'm sure adds some complexity to that but let's go with that.  You have two girlfriends and no one can sleep with anyone else.   Sounds like the perfect life, until you want a third 😀

Can you restrain yourself if she presents herself.

Edited 4 hours ago by Inliytened1

[LordFall]

50 minutes ago, Inliytened1 said:

Well you being bisexual I'm sure adds some complexity to that but let's go with that.  You have two girlfriends and no one can sleep with anyone else.   Sounds like the perfect life, until you want a third 😀

Can you restrain yourself if she presents herself.

In polyamory there is a concept called poly saturation which is the point where a polyamororous relationship reaches its limit with additional partners in terms of the time or emotional bandwidth to manage new relationships. 

I think if you engage in ethical non monogamy you will naturally hit that point where sleeping with new women causes no net benefit and starts to hinder your relationship even if you have two girlfriends at home that are genuinely okay with you sleeping with new women.

The cool thing is that each person and couple has their own polysaturation quota. For monogamous people it's 1 and for some polyamorous people it's 2 partners and for some it's 6 partners. It's beautiful quest to find that out IMO and I have no fucking clue what mine will be. I quite like the idea of a quad and having 3 girlfriends. I came to that idea before I truly embraced my bisexuality though so perhaps I will add 2 boyfriends to that and predict that my ideal polycule will feature 6 people total. Who knows will it hold up or will it be lower or higher? Find out on the next episode of LordFall's love life! 

Also people don't like talking about this but your material abundance plays a massive role in this. If you are broke and financially stressed then it'll be much harder to handle multiple partners. If you are rich and stressed and working all the time it'll be equally as hard. If you have a fat stack of cash and don't have to work for the rest of your life then I imagine it'll be much easier to focus on your dating life and just build a thriving household with multiple partners. So each person has to account for their financial and career realities and what that looks like for them over the next 30 years. 

For me I have been obsessed with building multiple streams of income and financial leverage for about 10 years now mostly for that reason but also for my own peace of mind and independence. It's finally starting to bear fruits so in the next few years I should be set to prioritize dating and have my personal finances taken care of.

AI is also a blessing for people in terms of work life balance and mastering it is a key to have a truly high quality dating life. I think that's a stage yellow insight that most will miss especially stage green folks that demonize AI. 

Edited 3 hours ago by LordFall

[Inliytened1]

33 minutes ago, LordFall said:

In polyamory there is a concept called poly saturation which is the point where a polyamororous relationship reaches its limit with additional partners in terms of the time or emotional bandwidth to manage new relationships. 

I think if you engage in ethical non monogamy you will naturally hit that point where sleeping with new women causes no net benefit and starts to hinder your relationship even if you have two girlfriends at home that are genuinely okay with you sleeping with new women.

The cool thing is that each person and couple has their own polysaturation quota. For monogamous people it's 1 and for some polyamorous people it's 2 partners and for some it's 6 partners. It's beautiful quest to find that out IMO and I have no fucking clue what mine will be. I quite like the idea of a quad and having 3 girlfriends. I came to that idea before I truly embraced my bisexuality though so perhaps I will add 2 boyfriends to that and predict that my ideal polycule will feature 6 people total. Who knows will it hold up or will it be lower or higher? Find out on the next episode of LordFall's love life! 

Also people don't like talking about this but your material abundance plays a massive role in this. If you are broke and financially stressed then it'll be much harder to handle multiple partners. If you are rich and stressed and working all the time it'll be equally as hard. If you have a fat stack of cash and don't have to work for the rest of your life then I imagine it'll be much easier to focus on your dating life and just build a thriving household with multiple partners. So each person has to account for their financial and career realities and what that looks like for them over the next 30 years. 

For me I have been obsessed with building multiple streams of income and financial leverage for about 10 years now mostly for that reason but also for my own peace of mind and independence. It's finally starting to bear fruits so in the next few years I should be set to prioritize dating and have my personal finances taken care of.

AI is also a blessing for people in terms of work life balance and mastering it is a key to have a truly high quality dating life. I think that's a stage yellow insight that most will miss especially stage green folks that demonize AI. 

Outstanding.  The whole premise rests on everyone engaged being of the same mindset. But that's not realistic.  For example..I didn't ask you if yuu encountered a third partner interested in joining the relationship.  I asked you if you guys are all out partying one night and she presented herself. Would you do her.  And what are the ramifications of that. You would need extreme sexual discipline to do what you are describing.  And this type of lifestyle seems contradictory to that. So would you fuck her and bury it perhaps?  Or would you hold true. I guess this is more of a character question. But if you already have multiple partners what's the harm if no one finds out?

Edited 2 hours ago by Inliytened1

[Yimpa]

 

[LordFall]

14 minutes ago, Inliytened1 said:

Outstanding.  The whole premise rests on everyone engaged being of the same mindset. But that's not realistic.  For example..I didn't ask you if yuu encountered a third partner interested in joining the relationship.  I asked you if you guys are all out partying one night and she presented herself. Would you do her.  And what are the ramifications of that. You would need extreme sexual discipline to do what you are describing.  And this type of lifestyle seems contradictory to that. So would you fuck her and bury it perhaps?  Or would you hold true. I guess this is more of a character question. But if you already have multiple partners what's the harm if no one finds out?

Someone did find out. You did. I think if you want true love you should never lie to your women. It's like one soul in multiple bodies, it shouldn't lie to itself. Another way to look at it is people holding a chain that keeps them together. If you let it go, it's over. Doesn't matter how long it takes for the relationship to unravel itself after that. 

That's why dating apps are so important so you can take charge of your dating life and don't feel like random girls throwing themselves at you is very valuable.

Polyamory is based on high trust and high communication. So if you want to fuck someone outside of your relationship you have to voice that and let your partner work through the emotions until they give you permission or veto it. If you YOLO it and fuck people left and right it's never gonna work. 

Edited 2 hours ago by LordFall

[Inliytened1]

17 minutes ago, LordFall said:

Someone did find out. You did. I think if you want true love you should never lie to your women. It's like one soul in multiple bodies, it shouldn't lie to itself. Another way to look at it is people holding a chain that keeps them together. If you let it go, it's over. Doesn't matter how long it takes for the relationship to unravel itself after that. 

That's why dating apps are so important so you can take charge of your dating life and don't feel like random girls throwing themselves at you is very valuable.

Polyamory is based on high trust and high communication. So if you want to fuck someone outside of your relationship you have to voice that and let your partner work through the emotions until they give you permission or veto it. If you YOLO it and fuck people left and right it's never gonna work. 

I gotcha. Well. If all this is the case, then this is no different than monogamy but just plus one. To me..all this would do is complicate things. And I'll tell you why.  It's because you aren't plus one on the guy.  Just the women. So it opens up feuds between women on who you love more.  Really think it through.   For it to be fair you would have to add a guy and then for each woman to have the same love for each guy.and vice versa.  Otherwise it is never an even playing field. You talk about me having no experience with polyamory but how much do you? I've been with the one girl who was in an open relationship and we went with different partners and I shared her.  Turned out I didn't like it very much.  So how would your two women feel sharing you.  Why would you need the second girl.

Edited 2 hours ago by Inliytened1

[Joshe]

swing dick like no other, 😂

 

[Inliytened1]

@LordFall The problem with guys is we are always looking for something new.  Something fresh. If your goal with two girls is to give you more selection - it will never be enough.

[LordFall]

2 minutes ago, Inliytened1 said:

@LordFall The problem with guys is we are always looking for something new.  Something fresh. If your goal with two girls is to give you more selection - it will never be enough.

You can bake that into your relationship and do threesomes with your woman. If you betray your woman though that ruins your chance at true love. It is important to get your needs and desires met though, I will give you that. Self-awareness and knowing what you want and what will make you snap towards unhealthy ways of getting those desires met is important.

[Joshe]

Ain't no pussy like new pussy

 

[Inliytened1]

3 minutes ago, LordFall said:

You can bake that into your relationship and do threesomes with your woman. If you betray your woman though that ruins your chance at true love. It is important to get your needs and desires met though, I will give you that. Self-awareness and knowing what you want and what will make you snap towards unhealthy ways of getting those desires met is important.

Well that's a different dynamic.  That's actually the one I prefer and I have had several girlfriends on board with that.  That is the best option in my opinion. You're getting something fresh and she's cool with it.  Only certain chick's are cool with that kind of stuff.  But they're great.  Of course..there is always a risk. You could fall somehow for that third girl.  Then what.  Heartbreak for your girl.  You could incorporate her into your other dynamic.  But again what happens when the next girl comes.out to play.

[LordFall]

7 minutes ago, Inliytened1 said:

Well that's a different dynamic.  That's actually the one I prefer and I have had several girlfriends on board with that.  That is the best option in my opinion. You're getting something fresh and she's cool with it.  Only certain chick's are cool with that kind of stuff.  But they're great.  Of course..there is always a risk. You could fall somehow for that third girl.  Then what.  Heartbreak for your girl.  You could incorporate her into your other dynamic.  But again what happens when the next girl comes.out to play.

You embark on a quest of great importance on behalf of science and the universe itself. What is the perfect number of girlfriends? It's so hard to tell, no man truly has that answer.

There are a specific number of atoms in the universe but the perfect number of women to have in your life? Physics can't help us here. Only the boldest will choose to go on this quest! Not for the weak. 

Edited 2 hours ago by LordFall

[Inliytened1]

6 minutes ago, LordFall said:

You embark on a quest of great importance on behalf of science and the universe itself. What is the perfect number of girlfriends? It's so hard to tell, no man truly has that answer.

There are a specific number of atoms in the universe but the perfect number of women to have in your life? Physics can't help us here. Only the boldest will choose to go on this quest! Not for the weak. 

Wouldn't that conflict with Einstein's claim that God doesn't play dice. 

 

[LordFall]

In systems theory the two top type of systems are complicated systems and complex systems.

Complicated systems are well complicated and have a lot of rules that you can eventually master. A complex system's rules cannot really be mastered as they are emergent and ever changing. 

From the human vantage point, reality, love, and relationships are inherently complex systems. You don't beat a complex system with a rigid, one-size-fits-all rulebook. You navigate it through adaptability, high awareness, and feedback loops.

Your best bet is practicing surfing and making sure you learn how to get back up on the board as easily as possible or getting on a nice yacht to enjoy the ride. Some people like to stay on the shore and play it safe. That’s never been my style, and knowing you, I doubt it’s yours either.

Edited 1 hour ago by LordFall

[Inliytened1]

7 minutes ago, LordFall said:

In systems theory the two top type of systems are complicated systems and complex systems.

Complicated systems are well complicated and have a lot of rules that you can eventually master. A complex system's rules cannot really be mastered as they are emergent and ever changing. 

From the human vantage point, reality, love, and relationships are inherently complex systems. You don't beat a complex system with a rigid, one-size-fits-all rulebook. You navigate it through adaptability, high awareness, and feedback loops.

Your best bet is practicing surfing and making sure you learn how to get back up on the board as easily as possible or getting on a nice yacht to enjoy the ride. Some people like to stay on the shore and play it safe. That’s never been my style, and knowing you, I doubt it’s yours either.

Yes  it is definitely a complex system.  Chaos theory in physics immediately comes to mind.  Adventure is my middle name, but I am too old for all of that now. Now I am just glad to get out of bed. 

[LordFall]

5 minutes ago, Inliytened1 said:

Yes  it is definitely a complex system.  Chaos theory in physics immediately comes to mind.  Adventure is my middle name, but I am too old for all of that now. Now I am just glad to get out of bed. 

You decide your destiny my man. Most men basically quit on their own life around 40 and don't grow much past then. I think what you need is a new 24 year old GF to bring some energy back into your routine.

Hugh Hefner was still seeing new chicks into his 80s. He married his 3rd wife Crystal Harris at 86 years old when she was 26. That guy was riding the wave for sure.

He did a lot of shitty things, but he was truly a man of impact that shaped our culture til today. My castle will be even cooler and of course bigger than the playboy mansion ever was. 

Edited 1 hour ago by LordFall

[Inliytened1]

12 minutes ago, LordFall said:

You decide your destiny my man. Most men basically quit on their own life around 40 and don't grow much past then. I think what you need is a new 24 year old GF to bring some energy back into your routine.

Hugh Hefner was still seeing new chicks into his 80s. He married his 3rd wife Crystal Harris at 86 years old when she was 26. That guy was riding the wave for sure.

He did a lot of shitty things, but he was truly a man of impact that shaped our culture til today. My castle will be even cooler and of course bigger than the playboy mansion ever was. 

I did it well into my 50's.   We will see how it goes with the ex. She has a good job now so we can do things and not just on my dime 😀 My last taste of one under 30 was at 52 and it was quite the treat.  But that was lucky. I'm well-off but I don't have the funds to be a hugh Hefner. I don't mind having one these days as long as it's still fun. And the ex is still 10 years younger which isn't bad.

Edited 1 hour ago by Inliytened1