Doing Day Game in Small City is Demoralizing

[Valach]

33 minutes ago, BlessedLion said:

Come to Bali it's literally over flooded with beautiful women, i don't even react or look twice anymore 

Been there about a month ago. I can confirm that it was packed with beautiful woman.

Edited yesterday at 01:29 PM by Valach

[Valach]

1 hour ago, Zenterus said:

@Valach Your argument has no foundation. 

You went from using the pain that women feel from guys not texting them to now moralizing about the ethics and integrity behind flirting with a girl you're not attracted to, after your initial point fell flat.

How so? I am still standing behind both things. Do not lie to people - it is not good for you and it can hurt them. Obviously these are my subjective values, everyone is free to develop their own.

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And yes, you might live in a city where there are many attractive women concentrated in a small area -- or you just have low standards -- but that's not most guy's situation.

Yeah. I've heard Prague is one of the best in Europe from couple of foreign PUAs whom I met here. I would not say my standards are low - but again, that is a subjective thing. 

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Additionally, not many guys have an hour to walk around and prowl the streets for girls. People have lives.

They do not have an hour to walk around and talk to woman they actually might want to date or take things further, yet they should spend their time flirting with woman they do not like? How does that make any sense? Finding a good partner requires some effort and time investment, we both know that.

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There's nothing wrong with approaching a girl and flirting with her just for the sake of it. In fact, its win win, in my opinion. I cant tell you how many times I approached a woman and had her thank me for flattering her with my attention because she was having a bad day or whatever.

Same thing happened to me and it is always heartwarming. But that usually happened when they saw me being authentic and truthful.  Usually me talking to woman I wanted to meet, yet they were taken or something like that. Woman are the best lie detector there is, they will see through your dishonesty. Specially if they are healthy.

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Flirting with women is a skill that requires a lot of practise if you're a newbie. 

Applying your logic to the financial aspect would be like telling a man who has no skills or education not to apply to minimum wage jobs and only apply to the jobs he really wants (lawyer, doctor, etc). How's that gonna work out for him?

And that is precisely my issue with the whole pickup stuff. This is objectifying of woman. Comparing them to jobs. As if you need to climb them up like in some corporate ladder. Meeting people or finding a partner is not some hard skill like engineering/finance. This is an innergame issue - it is about a relationship you have towards yourself.

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You have to start somewhere. 

And this is not me attacking you btw, bro. But you're just wrong.

I am not attacking you or @Miguel1 either. I have a lot of respect for both of you and I enjoy reading the stuff your write on here. But I still stand behind my point. Everything is subjective of course. But in my opinion - being dishonest is already setting up a foundation into learning the bad type of social skills you want. It is externally focused - Instead of asking yourself "How do I express myself truthfully" you ask yourself "How do I win this person over".

 

Exposure is important. Social practice is important. Therapy is important. But there are many ways to practice that don't require pretending attraction. Talk to strangers. Make friends. Practice conversations. Practice humor. Practice confidence. Then reserve expressions of romantic interest for women you're actually interested in.

 

PS: Sorry, I had much longer response but it did not get sent for some reason

Edited yesterday at 02:04 PM by Valach

[Schizophonia]

You go in a city in Georgia and what you think about is doing pick up 😸

Edited 8 hours ago by Schizophonia

[Schizophonia]

It's at least as “easy” in a small town as in a large one.

[Valach]

10 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

It's at least as “easy” in a small town as in a large one.

Well you kind of need more people to have a better chance of meeting someone you like. Big cities have this advantage over some small town.

[Leo Gura]

Yes, of course. Move to a big city with more girls.

Also, try night game first. Day game only works in very specific cities and locations. Most American cities do not have worthwhile day game. It is rare to have beautiful women walking around during the day. That only happens in specific places. You could stand for 3 hours at a grocery store and not find one woman worth approaching.

Rule #0 of pickup: Go where the hot women go.

Edited 7 hours ago by Leo Gura

[Schizophonia]

2 hours ago, Valach said:

Well you kind of need more people to have a better chance of meeting someone you like. Big cities have this advantage over some small town.

There's also more men/“competition” in big cities so it amounts to the same thing. 

[Valach]

1 hour ago, Schizophonia said:

There's also more men/“competition” in big cities so it amounts to the same thing. 

Yea. But it's better to be competing for 1 woman with 3 other guys than to not have any woman you want in the first place.

[Schizophonia]

49 minutes ago, Valach said:

Yea. But it's better to be competing for 1 woman with 3 other guys than to not have any woman you want in the first place.

That's nonsense even in a small town of 10,000 inhabitants there are hundreds to thousands of women between let's say 18 and 35; inevitably there are tons if not most of them that will appeal to you.

From my point of view it's not a significant criterion unless you're really looking to be a pickup artist or something like that idk.

Edited 3 hours ago by Schizophonia

[Valach]

8 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

That's nonsense even in a small town of 10,000 inhabitants there are hundreds to thousands of women between let's say 18 and 35; inevitably there are tons if not most of them that will appeal to you.

From my point of view it's not a significant criterion unless you're really looking to be a pickup artist or something like that idk.

I am originally from a city of 20k people and moved to Prague of 1.5 million. The difference between the woman in both places is insane. I do not think after my experience with woman from Prague I could even meet someone I like in my original city. 

If you just want sex, fine, whatever. But if you want partner, you need quality of choices. 

Edited 3 hours ago by Valach

[LordFall]

3 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

That's nonsense even in a small town of 10,000 inhabitants there are hundreds to thousands of women between let's say 18 and 35; inevitably there are tons if not most of them that will appeal to you.

From my point of view it's not a significant criterion unless you're really looking to be a pickup artist or something like that idk.

Small town's demographics tend to skew older so walking around there would be mostly older people not young attractive women. Also people tend to stay at home so when you go out to a busy spot you see a tiny percentage of them. And even if you're aiming to date the first attractive compatible woman you find(which I would recommend going out with multiple ones even if you'd like to only date one seriously at a time) you're gonna get along/be compatible with probably 5% of them at most and that's if your social skills are practiced otherwise you'll need to talk to dozens/hundreds of women to calibrate.

All this to say it's quite hard to date in small towns at least like you said there's less competition so if you're a reasonably well put together dude you'll have a nice shot. In big cities you take a walk and see 50 hot women within 10 mins like here in downtown montreal, it's a different life. There are always problem in life but if you love women don't add to it living in the middle of nowhere lol, maybe money and see the world is my motto.

[Valach]

1 minute ago, LordFall said:

Small town's demographics tend to skew older so walking around there would be mostly older people not young attractive women. Also people tend to stay at home so when you go out to a busy spot you see a tiny percentage of them. And even if you're aiming to date the first attractive compatible woman you find(which I would recommend going out with multiple ones even if you'd like to only date one seriously at a time) you're gonna get along/be compatible with probably 5% of them at most and that's if your social skills are practiced otherwise you'll need to talk to dozens/hundreds of women to calibrate.

All this to say it's quite hard to date in small towns at least like you said there's less competition so if you're a reasonably well put together dude you'll have a nice shot. In big cities you take a walk and see 50 hot women within 10 mins like here in downtown montreal, it's a different life. There are always problem in life but if you love women don't add to it living in the middle of nowhere lol, maybe money and see the world is my motto.

Basically this.

In my experience the quality woman in small towns get taken up really fast. So if you are 30 and single, you are gonna struggle finding your match.

[Schizophonia]

3 minutes ago, Valach said:

I am originally from a city of 20k people and moved to Prague of 1.5 million. The difference between the woman in both places is insane. I do not think after my experience with woman from Prague I could even meet someone I like in my original city. 

There are also more ugly women in big cities but you don't see it because you have a cognitive bias in favor of pretty girls. In facts there are just more people in general.

It’s like competence: there are more competent people in big cities but also more destitute degenerates, drug addicts, and so on; it's both ways.

I am currently in a town of 30,000 inhabitants including the outskirts and I constantly see pretty nice girls.

10 minutes ago, LordFall said:

Small town's demographics tend to skew older so walking around there would be mostly older people not young attractive women.

Also people tend to stay at home so when you go out to a busy spot you see a tiny percentage of them. And even if you're aiming to date the first attractive compatible woman you find(which I would recommend going out with multiple ones even if you'd like to only date one seriously at a time) you're gonna get along/be compatible with probably 5% of them at most and that's if your social skills are practiced otherwise you'll need to talk to dozens/hundreds of women to calibrate.

But you will always find young people at work, in leisure activities, or possibly on dating sites.

I don't know why you're being so ruthless lol for me it's closer to 20 or even 30%; that’s just my take but to me if you’re too rigid you finally end up infertile; my goal is simply to find someone nice to share my life with and have children.

My main disappointment with some people who claim to be spiritual and consume loads of psychedelics is that ultimately most of the time they turn out to be "Orange-stage" degenerates. They talk about love but don't build a family or even sports/hobbies careers, they talk about masculinity while being normal if not cowards in real life... There are sus things I don't like about this egregore.

I should start a YouTube channel where I talk about hunting, fishing, sports, beer, etc lol

10 minutes ago, LordFall said:

All this to say it's quite hard to date in small towns at least like you said there's less competition so if you're a reasonably well put together dude you'll have a nice shot.

Well there are young "Chads" in small towns too. Once again the only real difference aside from cognitive biases is the number or concentration of people.

And above all what I’m saying is that for me it’s not worth choosing a city for the sake of women especially if it comes at the expense of your own preferences and the general implications of settling in that city.

10 minutes ago, LordFall said:

In big cities you take a walk and see 50 hot women within 10 mins like here in downtown montreal, it's a different life.

Yes and so there are 50 other guys "competing" eheh

10 minutes ago, LordFall said:

There are always problem in life but if you love women don't add to it living in the middle of nowhere lol, maybe money and see the world is my motto.

That's true; I have a rather conservative/reserved attitude towards women.

It's my pov

[Valach]

1 minute ago, Schizophonia said:

There are also more ugly women in big cities but you don't see it because you have a cognitive bias in favor of pretty girls. In facts there are just more people in general.

It’s like competence: there are more competent people in big cities but also more destitute degenerates, drug addicts, and so on; it's both ways.

I am currently in a town of 30,000 inhabitants including the outskirts and I constantly see pretty nice girls.

My experience is that attractive woman who take care of themselfs are usually quite ambitious and move to big cities to study and stay there. Those who remain get taken up fairly quickly.

[Schizophonia]

12 minutes ago, Valach said:

My experience is that attractive woman who take care of themselfs are usually quite ambitious and move to big cities to study and stay there. Those who remain get taken up fairly quickly.

Highly qualified women are not particularly beautiful; there is no correlation.

And people are more complex than such a divide; you find a bit of everything everywhere.

[Valach]

Just now, Schizophonia said:

Highly qualified women are not particularly beautiful; there is no correlation.

And people are more complex than such a divide; you find a bit of everything everywhere.

Of course. I was being simplistic. Finding a partner is easier when you have a lot of options. That was my point.

[LordFall]

34 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

I don't know why you're being so ruthless lol for me it's closer to 20 or even 30%; that’s just my take but to me if you’re too rigid you finally end up infertile; my goal is simply to find someone nice to share my life with and have children.

You see yourself spending the rest of your life with 1/5 of 1/4 women you meet? That doesn't sound right and if it is why are you single? For me I like to be picky because then you don't have to settle on characteristics like for example I would never date a smart woman that I connect with intellectually if she's not too affectionate or not that sexual of a person. There are too many women in the world to settle. My true number is way less than 5%, that's still 1/20. 

I remember I had 3 FWBs when I was in Toronto and if I was more in scarcity I could've dated any of them but I wasn't really compatible with any of them. 

38 minutes ago, Schizophonia said:

Yes and so there are 50 other guys "competing" eheh

Most men are really low effort and don't put much thought into their lives so if you really tryhard for a few years like I have and build a fun, free and abundant lifestyle then only really massive outliers can compete with you and THEN it really becomes about personality and preference. 

You have to know which game you wanna play and which game you can play at though. I just turned 31 last week and I don't really plan on having kids before like 37-42 years old. Probably gonna freeze my sperm so I can take my time and really fulfill all the sexual experiences I want until I look to settle down. They're making breakthroughs in biotech so in 10 years age when having kids won't matter as much anyway so that whole timeline is pretty arbitrary. 

[Rasheed]

7 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Yes, of course. Move to a big city with more girls.

Also, try night game first. Day game only works in very specific cities and locations. Most American cities do not have worthwhile day game. It is rare to have beautiful women walking around during the day. That only happens in specific places. You could stand for 3 hours at a grocery store and not find one woman worth approaching.

Rule #0 of pickup: Go where the hot women go.

Which cities and places are the most worthwhile for day game? And which specific locations?

In all honesty, even when going in a packed Mall in Tbilisi, it is difficult to see an attractive woman worth approaching (and as I previously noted, my standards aren’t unrealistic or overtly high)…

[Schizophonia]

1 hour ago, LordFall said:

You see yourself spending the rest of your life with 1/5 of 1/4 women you meet?

Maybe it wouldn't be "perfect" but it doesn't matter

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That doesn't sound right and if it is why are you single?

Because i'm lazy; i'm used to be single and don't have that much pressure to find a girlfriend.

I talk to a great girl these days, i also have access to several girls i could flirt with eventually; we will see.

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For me I like to be picky because then you don't have to settle on characteristics like for example I would never date a smart woman that I connect with intellectually if she's not too affectionate or not that sexual of a person. There are too many women in the world to settle. My true number is way less than 5%, that's still 1/20. 

I remember I had 3 FWBs when I was in Toronto and if I was more in scarcity I could've dated any of them but I wasn't really compatible with any of them. 

Most men are really low effort and don't put much thought into their lives so if you really tryhard for a few years like I have and build a fun, free and abundant lifestyle then only really massive outliers can compete with you and THEN it really becomes about personality and preference. 

You have to know which game you wanna play and which game you can play at though. I just turned 31 last week and I don't really plan on having kids before like 37-42 years old. Probably gonna freeze my sperm so I can take my time and really fulfill all the sexual experiences I want until I look to settle down. They're making breakthroughs in biotech so in 10 years age when having kids won't matter as much anyway so that whole timeline is pretty arbitrary. 

Yes but here's the thing you place sex in the center of your life 

 

I want children asap; if tommorow i get a girldriend who wants children and i have enough money i would impregnate here with pleasure. Ok I find it cool to have sex but still insignifiant relatively to wearing my child in my arms, or the others goals i enumerated (sports career, gardening, ride a motorcycle, fishing/hunting, brewing my own beer or wine rice lol etcetc; anything).

Edited 9 minutes ago by Schizophonia