What is best pickup model ?

[Carl-Richard]

On 11.5.2026 at 4:59 AM, aurum said:

Pickup is NOT just talking to people. Conflating these two things is a mistake.

Pickup is far more involved. And it's more of modern phenomena than something humans have simply always done. Which is why we need modern solutions.

Pickup theory goes far beyond talking. Pickup theory includes feminine psychology, social psychology, logistics, how to find venues, how to work staff, state management, online game, general networking principles and more.

None of this is just obvious. And if it is obvious, then congrats. You are not the audience for learning pickup. But this does not make it invalid for guys who do need it.

The goal is to talk to women or "have success" with women (talk, connect, sleep with them, simply be with them, whatever you consider success), which is what I was commenting on pickup in relation to. All of that lies well within your skillset as a human being. Walking and music and other intuitive activities are good analogies.

Pickup other than a few books from the 70s and 80s is terminally online / antisocial people trying to find a way to not be terminally online by consuming more terminally online content. And because they're terminally online, talking to women is framed as you're this soldier in Vietnam who ventures deep into the jungle on a mission encountering dangerous creatures and daunting tasks. Meanwhile in the real world, people simply talk to each other and hang out and then things develop from there. Pickup essentially does not exist in the real world. The real world equivalent is "dating".

Pickup is in large part a vehicle for invading a social circle or space. And when you're not a part of the social circle, you're just an invader, you are generally not able to establish lasting meaningful connections, and the whole game usually becomes about being fast in and out, clinical, transactional, maximizing numbers, not real depth. It's the intersection of antisocial behavior, modern social spaces and capitalist mentality. It's understandable given the times, but sometimes one should question the solutions that are available.

It's also seemingly a strategy for people who genuinely are on the spectrum to learn socialization. They seem to need rules, need concrete techniques, or they just prefer that mode of approaching problems. If you are that, sure, go for it. But if you are simply not talking to women, interacting with them, and you wonder why you feel awkward, anxious or incapable of talking to them, maybe it's a problem of practice; just like trying to walk after lying in a hospital bed for 6 months.

 

EDIT: It is almost a tangent at this point, but you earlier discarded what I said about learning music theory being at most a bonus if not a detriment to being a good musician, and I think it's still relevant, as talking to women and whatever proceeds is still super intuitive: Aurora Aksnes, musical genius, said she was self-taught on the piano with no music theory knowledge when she wrote "Runaway" at 11 years old. That song has 1.25 billion streams on Spotify. I have more examples in that vein.

Edited 8 hours ago by Carl-Richard

[Ramanujan]

@Miguel1 bro , how long will it take to get good in game. like how many years

[Ramanujan]

@Carl-Richard pickup is for high Se people. INFP would get fucked if they dont choose another INFP. or INTJ. or INTP. due to low Se

[Miguel1]

48 minutes ago, Ramanujan said:

@Miguel1 bro , how long will it take to get good in game. like how many years

For you probably 2-3 years hardcore maybe 1-2

[Ramanujan]

@Miguel1 thanks bro