When did you first become conscious, and what do you remember?

[UnbornTao]

And the Lord said, Let there be wind; and there was wind.

[mmKay]

13 hours ago, Jehovah increases said:

I have heard stories of humans remembering being in there mums womb I doubt there is any truth to this. but then again there could be.

 

13 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

Unlikely but probably possible for exceptional people.

Not to leak too much personal info, but I once I had a client with Diogenes Syndrome. She’s in her early 30s. She has 3 apartments full of stuff to the top.

After 6 hours of conversation, turns out that she was sexually abused at birth, which she actually could remember.

She told me she remembered that her consciousness withdrew into pure nothingness, and she observed what was happening to her “from the outside.”, like a 3rd person perspective. She completely detached from her body. 

So we concluded that what happened is that her mind then created a negative association with nothingness (that “place” she found herself in during that traumatic experience), which resulted in a fear of “nothingness” (look up “kenophobia or nihilophobia”), and then she got into the habit of compulsively filling out any kind of emptiness with “stuff,” to run away from “nothing.”

She filled physical emptiness with objects (and every object had a special meaning or story her mind would hold onto, to escape the absence of meaning of the objects), contributing to the compulsive hoarding.

She escaped loneliness (emptiness of company) with 8 simultaneous relationships.

She filled her mind with consistent, endless thoughts (what she called “ADHD”).

She filled silence in conversations with endless talking.

So she had to do progressive desensitisation with nothingness, break the belief that “nothing” is bad (CBT type stuff , and embrace and love “nothingness.”

Two decades of therapists couldn’t help her.

To this day, the most fascinating client I’ve had. When you merge proper metaphysics and spirituality with psychology, everything clicks so beautifully.

She’s also fully God-awake 24/7. She speaks about all the stuff Leo speaks about from direct experience (and so much more). Our first two sessions were 6½-hour long because of how fascinated I was and how much she was getting out of it.

Pretty ridiculous looking back, actually.

I’m actually going to meet her in person because of how unique she is.

Leo would love to interview her lol

 

Bonus; chech out Apeirophobia, the Fear of Infinity,  Sigephobia, fear of Silence or Chronophobia, the fear of the passage of time. 

Edited 12 hours ago by mmKay

[Ramasta9]

When I was born I remember looking at my mother looking down at me like who is this creature and what does she want with me? Later i often questioned what is this reality, why cant i remember where i was before ect.... 

[Joshe]

Staring down at green carpet, wondering where I was and why I was suffering, in the midst of chaos and trauma. 

My father stormed in after drinking, slammed the door, the ornament hanging on the door fell off, then he punched my mom in the face and told me to give her a hug while she was crying and then to go to my room, which had green carpet. 

Hell of a first memory, ey? lol 

Chaos needs managed. 

Edited 12 hours ago by Joshe

[Leo Gura]

7 hours ago, mmKay said:

After 6 hours of conversation, turns out that she was sexually abused at birth, which she actually could remember.

She told me she remembered that her consciousness withdrew into pure nothingness, and she observed what was happening to her “from the outside.”, like a 3rd person perspective. She completely detached from her body. 

That's called dissociation. It is common in children who were abused.

[mmKay]

16 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

That's called dissociation. It is common in children who were abused.

I mean what I described is way more hardcore than common disassociation given the context I've given. Just throwing it into that bucket doesn't make it justice.

Plus stuff like disassociation, derealisation and depersonalisation is not even properly understood by psychologists since pretty much none have a proper epistemological and metaphysical understanding 

Edited 7 hours ago by mmKay