enchanted

Anyone who is married here, would you recommend it?

19 posts in this topic

I've heard some people recommend not getting married due to its many drawbacks such as it being expensive, it ties you down, you can only have sex with one person unless you cheat, you lose half your stuff if it doesn't work out? yet despite this alot people end up getting married anyway. Any advice from married folk here?

Edited by enchanted

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I'm not married but I'm setting it as the main goal. No need to worry about cheating or getting bored from your wife. If you marry the right girl then the honey moon is going to be probably the most wild period in your life . God created each of us like polar opposites of magnetic power..masculine needs feminine in his life so he can calm the fuck down and find a healthy way to manage his testosterone instead of fighting with boys . And the feminine needs a masculine energy in her life to feel safe and secure ..and to achieve her dream of becoming a mother. 

Edited by Someone here

 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

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I am getting married in the autumn. It’s the right choice for me in this moment, even amongst all the other desires I have such as sex with other beautiful women. Staying single and chasing women has its perks, putting this energy into a long term relationship also has its perks. It’s always a grass is greener on the other side situation when you starting contemplating what value it brings you. Both scenarios are valid life paths, don’t fret about getting it right or wrong. When I did the single thing, I saw my life as shallow and longed for deeper connection. In an LTR, I create fomo about all the hot bitches I could be slamming and missing the adventurous nature of new passions and new women. Pick your FOMO. For me long term makes more sense for my spiritual growth and long term career plans. I also value family, love her as a person, she’s my best friend, and I generally enjoy being with her. We can only live in the present moment and I believe it’s right for my life to make this choice. Maybe for you, you see yourself benefiting from being open to different women and finding something better each time, I don’t know. Don’t take it too seriously either. I think the most honest relationships take into account that they could end one day due to people growing apart and wanting different things. I’m not naive. The most honest and long term marriages don’t deny this possibility.

Edited by Lyubov

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@Lyubov Hope you have a nice weeding! And an even better marriagexD


God-Realize, this is First Business. Know that unless I live properly, this is not possible.

There is this body, I should know the requirements of my body. This is first duty.  We have obligations towards others, loved ones, family, society, etc. Without material wealth we cannot do these things, for that a professional duty.

There is Mind; mind is tricky. Its higher nature should be nurtured, then Mind becomes Wise, Virtuous and AWAKE. When all Duties are continuously fulfilled, then life becomes steady. In this steady life GOD is available; via 5-MeO-DMT, because The Sun shines through All: Living in Self-Love, Realizing I am Infinity & I am God

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31 minutes ago, Davino said:

@Lyubov Hope you have a nice weeding! And an even better marriagexD

Thanks so much. I got her to agree to a very affordable wedding and a dress she could wear more than once. Because I think we both are starting to realizing this lifestyle that’s sold by society where you need all this expensive stuff and to follow all these traditions actually aren’t great for building a long term marriage. Can save and use that cash to put a down payment on a house, go on an amazing holiday, etc. thanks again for your kind words. 

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@Lyubov 🎊 congrats man . Happy for you .Little bit envying though lol 😂 


 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

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What’s the advantage of marriage as oppose to just being together? Let’s imagine your partner is neutral

 

A fun event? Good sign in business? Religious reasons? Tax benefits?

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2 hours ago, Spiral said:

What’s the advantage of marriage as oppose to just being together? Let’s imagine your partner is neutral

 

A fun event? Good sign in business? Religious reasons? Tax benefits?

Why does marriage exist?  And also "being together"? Why aren't humans running around naked having an open orgy banging each other's on the streets like chimpanzees? 


 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

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4 hours ago, Someone here said:

@Lyubov 🎊 congrats man . Happy for you .Little bit envying though lol 😂 

Thanks!!!

2 hours ago, Spiral said:

What’s the advantage of marriage as oppose to just being together? Let’s imagine your partner is neutral

Thing is though most partners aren't neutral. Most women won't just "be together with you." They want to get married after some time or walk because it's a waste of their time. Have a child or children, build a family, stability, formal agreements, etc. So if you value those things then you should get married. Just being together is fine but it doesn't always segue into fully committing to something, which is what the decision of marriage brings you into vs just getting your toes wet. Just being together usually doesn't lead to a deeper relationship. 

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Also, resource-intensive. You've got about 16 hours per day. You might work 8, which leaves 8 left. Factor in eating, commute, daily duties, errands, etc, and you're down to 5 or 6, if you're lucky. Now, factor in a minimum of 3 hours per day for the relationship. You now have 2-3 hours left. 

Have kids? Kiss all your free time goodbye. This does not seem appealing to me at all. 

Observing married people, many of them wish they could get out, for obvious reasons. Your life isn't really yours anymore once you commit to this lifestyle. 

Edited by Joshe

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On 8/11/2025 at 5:07 AM, Lyubov said:

I am getting married in the autumn. It’s the right choice for me in this moment, even amongst all the other desires I have such as sex with other beautiful women. Staying single and chasing women has its perks, putting this energy into a long term relationship also has its perks. It’s always a grass is greener on the other side situation when you starting contemplating what value it brings you. Both scenarios are valid life paths, don’t fret about getting it right or wrong. When I did the single thing, I saw my life as shallow and longed for deeper connection. In an LTR, I create fomo about all the hot bitches I could be slamming and missing the adventurous nature of new passions and new women. Pick your FOMO. For me long term makes more sense for my spiritual growth and long term career plans. I also value family, love her as a person, she’s my best friend, and I generally enjoy being with her. We can only live in the present moment and I believe it’s right for my life to make this choice. Maybe for you, you see yourself benefiting from being open to different women and finding something better each time, I don’t know. Don’t take it too seriously either. I think the most honest relationships take into account that they could end one day due to people growing apart and wanting different things. I’m not naive. The most honest and long term marriages don’t deny this possibility.

Just curious but are you in your 30s currently? 

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12 hours ago, integration journey said:

Just curious but are you in your 30s currently? 

Yep I am 35. So for me I’m in what I believe is a decent place in life for this. Even then it’s still a big change and feels very special and unique, like a milestone you reach in life. Who knows, I’m not an idealist. I don’t take things super seriously nor place high expectations, as life is like a river with many bends and many unknowns. It’s right for me now and with what I can reason. So I want to do it. 

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On 11/08/2025 at 8:59 PM, Lyubov said:

Thing is though most partners aren't neutral. Most women won't just "be together with you." They want to get married after some time or walk because it's a waste of their time. Have a child or children, build a family, stability, formal agreements, etc. So if you value those things then you should get married. Just being together is fine but it doesn't always segue into fully committing to something, which is what the decision of marriage brings you into vs just getting your toes wet. Just being together usually doesn't lead to a deeper relationship. 

My country is a bit extreme in many ways. But I’ll recognize that most women globally want marriage. So yes, giving them it is certainly an advantage of marriage and only reason I would ever do it.

The rest of the points I don’t really see. If a woman doesn’t care, you can still build a family. Have kids, stability and on. 

If you get married someone might stay just because it inconvenient to leave, legally, in terms of effort and financially. Is that great? I don’t think so. I want to be certain someone stays because they want to, not because they “have” to. 

I think this is just a cultural thing, I know a bunch of people who have been together for over a decade. Living together and got kids(of the intensional variety)

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On 11/08/2025 at 8:13 PM, Someone here said:

Why does marriage exist?  And also "being together"? Why aren't humans running around naked having an open orgy banging each other's on the streets like chimpanzees? 

Today it’s a romantic display of commitment. With legal ramifications. Possibly religious ones too, if you are so inclined. Everything else is fluff.

Marriage used to be for social cohesion and diplomacy. To marry our families together, not just two people. That’s not just for nobility and royalty but for the average Joe too.

Than it became more of a protection for woman, back in the day when woman barely worked outside the household. So that they had something to their name if something went wrong in their relationship.

Now it’s a relationship goal, to show that you as a guy is serious about this relationship. That makes the woman feel safe in knowing you really want this.

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@Joshe You do not need to spend three hours a day on the relationship. 1 hour of “bed talk daily-ish” and 2-3 dates a week works fine. Besides you’re probably having dinner together most evening so you do not have to count that twice.

Kids however will ruin your personal time

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43 minutes ago, Spiral said:

@Joshe You do not need to spend three hours a day on the relationship. 1 hour of “bed talk daily-ish” and 2-3 dates a week works fine. Besides you’re probably having dinner together most evening so you do not have to count that twice.

Kids however will ruin your personal time

Many women I know complain about not having enough of their man's time. They want more, but there's not anymore time to give. They don't easily accept the reality and as such, create needless suffering for themselves and their man, making him feel like he isn't good enough for them. This is a common issue. Saw it just yesterday. 

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18 minutes ago, Joshe said:

Many women I know complain about not having enough of their man's time. They want more, but there's not anymore time to give. They don't easily accept the reality and as such, create needless suffering for themselves and their man, making him feel like he isn't good enough for them. This is a common issue. Saw it just yesterday. 

I think that’s a combination of two factors, firstly the girl might now have her own social life. 

Secondly and more importantly, it is to a great degree of about quality. A girl needs to feel safe knowing you value her and the relationship.

Sitting around watching tv, won’t really cut it as time spent together. So doing that or some similar won’t cut it, even if it is three hours a day

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3 minutes ago, Spiral said:

I think that’s a combination of two factors, firstly the girl might now have her own social life. 

Secondly and more importantly, it is to a great degree of about quality. A girl needs to feel safe knowing you value her and the relationship.

Sitting around watching tv, won’t really cut it as time spent together. So doing that or some similar won’t cut it, even if it is three hours a day

100% 

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