The Princess Diaries

[CoolDreamThanks]

On 01/07/2025 at 9:34 AM, Princess Arabia said:

There is no will. Whether free or determined or God's. Will implies reason and meaning. That's all dream stuff. It's all done. Will implies movement, time and space. Will Implies something or someone willing something into existence. There is no God that wills anything. That's the dream imagining. Will is being imagined and appears as such to an observer. Relativity is illusory as that's also the Absolute appearing as. Anything that appears is nothing as nothing is being that. So, all that stuff cannot stand on it's own and is all stories made up by the dream. All there is, is all there is. No separation, no movement and not still, no cause and effect, no time no space, no subject no object, no here no there, no now no present, no nothing yet everything. Real and unreal. No position, no bounds, timeless, causeless everywhere and nowhere. Cannot be pointed to. No reason or meaning. Say that's meaning all you want, that's just semantics and word games. No thing, no yet's, if's but's, why's, how's. Where's the will in that.

Uu nice insight!

Just starting to realize something similar I think:
 

it seems like it’s all just happening without a center, yet the happening is mysteriously intelligent and this happening is looking back at itself through the eyes of his chosen “victim” aka you haha. But there’s no you, just it appearing as you, and I think the more the contracted sense of “me” dissolves the more you feel one with the mysterious happening. In the end it’s probably no you feeling one with the universe, just one mysterious happening without any division.

[Princess Arabia]

6 hours ago, CoolDreamThanks said:

Uu nice insight!

Just starting to realize something similar I think:
 

it seems like it’s all just happening without a center, yet the happening is mysteriously intelligent and this happening is looking back at itself through the eyes of his chosen “victim” aka you haha. But there’s no you, just it appearing as you, and I think the more the contracted sense of “me” dissolves the more you feel one with the mysterious happening. In the end it’s probably no you feeling one with the universe, just one mysterious happening without any division.

:):):) love it

[Princess Arabia]

I'm bursting out bawling today. For no major apparent reason. Thoughts appearing. Thoughts about freedom and what's appearing. Thoughts about the Absolute. Thoughts about how impersonal it is. Thoughts about how real it feels. Thoughts about how it expresses itself. About how it's not going anywhere, this is it, about how this me, is it there or is it? Don't know. Can't know. A feeling is just appearing and that is nothing appearing as a feeling. Everything is nothing being and I can't get a hold of that. I can't control that. I can't choose what to feel, it just comes and goes. Something here notices that, something here sees the impermanence in the appearance. It's wonderfully frightening. If I dwell on that I might develop anxiety so I don't and this here isn't prone to anxiety attacks because there's no dwelling in the what if's about life much, just what is and the past. Future is not a favorite. It can't see it. Doesn't know it at least i know the past and what is. That's the knowing energy. It seemingly develops the dis-ease of anxiety when it doesn't know and dwells in the unknown. Depression is the knowing energy dwelling in the past. Like it built it's house on a depression fault line. The rain came and dug a hole and knowing built it's house on that fault line and depression is the result. It get's deeper and deeper into the hole and for it to get out it has to rise above the fault line or just move out. Most just stay there and live there. 

The present moment is the sweet spot, they say, but where is the present moment. How does one find it, or remain there. Every time one tries to stay there another moment arises; where is the last moment. It's gone? The one that you abided in prior. So how can one stay in the present. Impossible. Anyway, I'm just rambling on about stuff no one particular topic and I'm going way too much into left field and all over the place. Enough for now.

[Princess Arabia]

We're fighting a losing battle called life. 

[Princess Arabia]

I can see value in the drug addict on the street corner and the useless garbage picker picking for food in the garbage. The value I get from that is noticing how people don't see value in these people but only people that can give them something whether it be knowledge and a way to better their experience. We look up to these big names not because of them as a person as much as what they can bring to the table for ME. We throw around top notch names and big them up dead or alive and say how they bring value to ME. I get a lot of value from........more things to add to the pot. I do it too, so it's not a criticism, just an observation of how the me operates and keeps it's momentum going. 

I get value from babies, from hood thugs, from the elderly, from hookers and strippers and from well-established names and great philosophers. I get value from the handicapped, from the neighbor, from the hot chick, from the insecure guy, from the narcissist, from the idiot, from the foolish and the wise. They all teach us something. We miss it because we're looking for a better experience and we don't and can't see value in anything that doesn't match up to that idea, the one we've dreamt about and see happening for ourselves. How can a drug dealer bring value to me (except for supplying the drugs we use), the value is in the realization that we have biases, preferences in who and what brings us value and the specific things we seek. To be able to see how a granny or an ordinary neighbor is looked at as just another human while all the credit goes to the geniuses and smart people we read about in books. How we see the world. The differences. Evaluation. Notice of the bias and prejudices we have formulated to get by and how everything is about who and what can bring the me value. How we call other people corrupt and low conscious and inauthentic and whatever else we can come up with but fail to see how everything in life is about us, us, us, us, us, no matter what it is, even when it seems we're helping others, it's about us, us, us, us, us and what we can get, get, get, get, get, the more valuable the better. No different than a high-end consumer and a lower-end one. No different than a personal preference for a Rolex or for regular watch, a Mercedes or a Honda. I get a lot of spiritual value from...is no different than a high-end retail shopper.

That drug dealer or hooker is as much valuable as a philosopher's word or not. It depends on who's looking and what they can get. The value depends on the person buying. If I can't get anything from you, you're not valuable TO ME. If I can get something from you, then you're valuable TO ME but I put a label on that value and the price tag that thing charges you depends on what's being sought after in the moment....or not. Sometimes it's a year or 5 or 10 yr endeavor so that value can be stretched out but if it's like say a quick cum or a quick hit or a quick dopamine rush the value is in the moment.

Edited July 2 by Princess Arabia

[Princess Arabia]

You'll find a lot of talent on the streets, in prisons, on crack fein row doing heroine and overdosing on the streets, fentanyl row, in the gutters and slums. They weren't recognized and didn't have opportunities to express those talents and they felt hopeless and lacking motivation and was let down by society and didn't feel they stood a chance. They weren't recognized and they felt they were of no use and value to others. Others were getting all the cheers and hi-fives and love while they looked on in hopelessness.

We invent stuff to boost the ego some more and only those that could afford it, got recognized while I'm over here with lots to offer but can't because I'm unable to, it says to itself in despair. Then it turns to substances to cope with the despair of the unrecognition. We're constantly helping those already in a good place and keep knocking down those who are trying to be but find the circumstances challenging to do so; and to make matters worse, no one wants them because they are not "valuable" even though they're trying to be but can't seem to catch a break. This is how the systems are set up.

We throw the suicidals in institutions against their will and lock them up and tell them to go get treatment and therapy after we create the conditions for it to happen in the first place. We create the conditions and environment for illnesses and imbalances to flourish and then we treat those illnesses and imbalances and dis-ease with more things that causes a different kind of illness imbalance and dis-ease. 

Sometimes we feel we can't express the ways we feel can help the environment to flourish because we are looked at as a nobody or no one cares about me or for whatever reason and to be of use and service so we turn to things that can provide us with the feelings we're looking to feel or to feel nothing at all. We have given some people props while abandoning the efforts of the small man and that has created an imbalance. Then we try to fix that imbalance. It's a never-ending cycle. Infinite. Anyone says this isn't infinite is blind. Infinity's expression everywhere,

 

 

[Princess Arabia]

Breaking up the mood a bit here and showing my other side. Love old school hip hop. This the jam right here. Let's party tonight, baby. Yeah mon. Irie.

[Princess Arabia]

Another party classic. I know every word to this song. I would rock the whole song all the way through.

Edited July 3 by Princess Arabia

[Princess Arabia]

Let's do this.

[Princess Arabia]

If I ruled the world....imagine that!

[Princess Arabia]

Time to go home everybody. Wrap it up with this last dance. Grab a partner. Good nite! Thanks for coming🥰🥳🥳

[Princess Arabia]

The ego likes to undo things it never did in the first place. It likes the idea of having control over.....yet it never had control over starting what it wants to undo. 

Make yourself believe something. Go ahead. Do it now. Genuinely believe that thing. Not because someone asks you to but because you want to. Now. Won't happen. It may happen after the course of some events. After reassurances and proofs. Snapshot after snap shot. Then a belief gets crystallized. Repetitive thoughts over and over and over. Now an identity is born. Took awhile. Now unbelieve that thing, now. Won't happen. Needs new thoughts and brain images and memory. It's like building a computer from scratch or updating the software. Can you just tell the computer you're on right now to change it's operating system, no. Work has to be done. It has to be reprogrammed, which takes time and energy. Same with the person. Can't undo another person just like that. Just by talking to it. It has to go through changes. Experiences. Programming. They're not doing that, it's being done. So, one cannot change a person just like that because the person isn't a person with a mind of their own that can choose to just believe something on a whim. Truly believe it. Living from that belief and operating from that place. Can't happen.

This is why the egoic structure is so stubborn and sly. It took numerous mechanisms and structures for it to operate the way it does and will take more than a pep talk to change that. Hypnosis and reprogramming by repetition are ways that change can seemingly come about. The nervous system has to be dealt with in a timely and delicate manner. Can't just go around shocking people's nervous systems by expecting a new belief system to take over instantly. That's a shock to the system and can cause the body to react in unfavorable ways. Bad enough the body feels the sensation of a driver; but because there's no actual driver, it gets dis-eased and has all sorts of neurological problems. Trying to function on it's own but sometimes getting off-balance by certain practices it goes through. 

 

 

[Princess Arabia]

Nothing is really being understood, known, clarified or even being pointed to. This is why some may appear to not understand and speak from a place of confusion even after they've demonstrated that they've understood said subject or topic. Of course, in normal back and forth conversations and on average and in the flow of things it seems that one is understanding and one is clarifying to the other and the person got it and the other is explaining to the other and they've both accomplished a feat of explaining, clarifying and understanding. No. Words (mumbo jumbo) was exchanged, something familiar with those words interpreted them and something energetically collected that data and with the use of recognition of some kind (not sure how it all works) but it is apparently happening all by itself and not even really and without anyone doing anything. Ever heard of machines using face-recognition to identify people. How do we think that's possible. Even AI and robots. Do you really think that's anything special and different and some extraordinary invention; we're not much different than robots and AI and no we don't have souls and consciousness and don't even bother with the AI and robots can't feel and love and all that jazz because we can't either. Only appears that way. Everything, Everything, Everything, is Nothing appearing as such including feelings, apparent beliefs of souls, thoughts ideas concepts understanding, clarifying, everything. Sometimes I wonder how this hasn't become obvious. I feel when I speak like this I'm sounding ordinary to myself but it's being accepted as some weird as message and this girl is luny toon. Tk ne it's so obvious. It's not a lived sense because there's no one actually choosing to live a certain way so I can't live like oh well there's no one here so......no it's not like that, it's automatic. The clues are everywhere. Very subtle. All I just explained isn't really happening either since actual happenings require time and space, it's all apparent and empty and void of any reality or real substance, but that can't be known. 

[Princess Arabia]

Dear God, I'm so sorry for saying all the time I didn't choose to come here. You have shown me how you didn't either, and because of that I must be here, can't not be here because there is no choice in the matter. I have always contemplated that and it was the premise for a lot of my resisting, combative, defiant and rebellious arguments against life. Why should I have to so and so and so and so when I didn't ask to be here. I now truly get how I didn't ask to be here but must be here. I'm not even really here but i won't get into that now. I just wanted to say, thanks for always answering my genuine and curious inquiries into the nature of things and I truly believe that because I've not attached myself to any outcomes, don't really care about anything in the sense of what happens to me or trying to get anything from life other than for the survival of my being and body and that I am in love with life itself to the point where at times I hate it. 

I don't care what happens to me in the sense where there's not much attachment there anymore and I realize it's not permanent and live from that place, therefore there's a lot of love expressions coming out for others and can see the beauty that's in everything it most things. Not everything, gotta be real about this, but most. Beauty is in the cusp of life, the transitions, the impermanence, the changes. Most want permanency but that's not where beauty lies, it lies where there's nothing to point to permanently to say that's beautiful, it lies where no one can get attached to it, it lies where it can't be owned or claimed, it lies in the shape-shifting. 

This is why I don't mind suffering anymore and I don't chase happiness. It's all transient and beauty also can be found there. People don't realize how it's the happiness that they chase that's responsible for their sadness and suffering. Not pain, that's different, pain is inevitable, it's how life feels itself but suffering is not that's illusory and spawns from ignorance. Ignorance and attachment and neurosis. It's not a judgment but a revelation. Takes a while to get to understand and relate to this but I have. Not saying I never suffer but it's over so quickly even when the circumstances of the suffering remains the same. I've kind of taken me out the picture but it's not easy when it's so embedded and feels so real. 

I get it now, I must be, just as you must be as I'm not separate from nor united with nor connected to, it's simply a matter of ALL THERE IS and all there is, is simply just that, ALL THAT IS. There's nothing that must be, all that must be is all that is which is simultaneously nothing and everything, full and empty and neither. I am not one with you as there's no I and there's no you. I get it now and also don't.

[Schizophonia]

@Princess Arabia Your pp is original and funny

[Princess Arabia]

1 minute ago, Schizophonia said:

@Princess Arabia Your pp is original and funny

What's pp?

[integration journey]

3 minutes ago, Princess Arabia said:

What's pp?

Profile picture 

[Princess Arabia]

Just now, integration journey said:

Profile picture 

Ok. Thought I'd change up a bit. 

[Princess Arabia]

Humans are like viruses and bacteria; they're dependent on other humans for their host and uses them as self-reproduction. That's how viruses operate. Recently I seen a post where scientists discovered a species between life and death. Tadaah! There's neither happening here. This isn't life, this isn't death, that's polarization and "nothing" is not and cannot be polarized but only in appearance. This "nothing" is pretty simple and ordinary, even though it can't be described but language is needed but what can appear is where the shit gets all complicated, mind-blowing and what the hell is going on here type shit. All appearances are empty but damn, it sure doesn't seem that way. Full and empty at the same time. All the complications and profundities we seemingly perceive, express and respond to is "nothing" appearing as. "Nothing" sure does cause quite a chaos in it's "path" and for not going anywhere sure is quite a pain in the ass. Hehe...don't hate.

If there was nothing for the individual to latch on to and hold on to for dear life it would die, but it keeps on keeping on and keeps on grabbing on to anything it can and feed off of. That's how it maintains itself. It feeds off of others. This is how others really doesn't exist because it doesn't even exist, it's all being done as the dream of separation which is totally illusory and doesn't have a reality all on it's own. It's parasitic.

Journals like this one and so many other ways is also ways of maintaining itself. Pretending to be talking to itself but feeding off the premise that others are reading and grasping what's being said. Nothing but a ploy to hang on to dear life. There's something here that intuits this. It's nothing known. Something can be open to things that cannot be pointed to or known or even be perceived and all that is also illusory because to point, know and perceive requires space, time and not separate to even be. There's no one here saying anything it's just writing happening. The one that thinks it's writing and relating to anything is not real. Something intuits that and doesn't need psychedelics or any practice to recognize or realize and those two words are also not the case because it takes someone to realize and recognize something and that's impossible where there's no separation. It's all a fucking game and all illusory....until it's not.

 

 

 

[Princess Arabia]

Why does it seem like thoughts are only a bother when there's someone there listening to them, claiming them, paying attention to them, engaging with them. They are also noticed more when there are no distractions; like sitting in a quiet room or even driving a familiar route. Thoughts seem rampant then. Walking down the street. They're usually more rampant when alone but as soon as someone appears and says something, the thought that was maybe going to appear right at that exact moment ceases to be. I mean thoughts were coming and going every 1/10th of a sec before Suzie came into the room, but Suzie's appearance for one minute slowed down the thoughts. Or was it Suzie's appearance. Maybe for a quick second the me disappeared or there was no observer at all not even for Suzie.

Maybe no one on both sides was there listening and talking just for a millisecond and thoughts stopped appearing to the or for the one that believed the thoughts were his to begin with, now for a quick sec that self disappeared. Thoughts were there, always there and at the same frequency, but no one acknowledged them in that millisecond, then it came back again and here comes a thought and Susie's appearance seems morbid and mundane now so the thoughts start to speed back up again. What if those thoughts never lost momentum, it was you that did. You went in and out of existence not the thoughts. Maybe when one experiences thoughts slowing down, maybe it isn't the thoughts that got slower but the individual or observer collapsed in those moments. Food for thought.