Tried out dating for about 3 years, no results. Should I just focus on other stuff?

[Thewritersunion]

So, I’ve been working on developing myself since I was about 11. Exercising, improving my writing skills, and got into spirituality. And, eventually after some years of that stuff, I decided to go into dating. I’ve learned and practiced everything I could in this category of my life, but so far I’ve found zero results. I’ve tried dating women, asking them out, dating apps, online stuff; none of them have seemed to work out. 
 

Should I keep trying to date or just spend my time elsewhere? From my general impression I’ve only gotten that the women around me and the women I meet are just looking for a perfect dude and don’t want to settle down with anyone. Could just be me and my youth as I’m 19 as of writing this, but eh, I wanted a second opinion. I’m kind of sick going out and trying this whole game and want to just put this time into writing more outside of college work. 

[Thewritersunion]

👍 If you have any questions, feel free to go on ahead. It’s a pretty large question to ask in the first place, so I’m not sure if y’all need more information to make y’all’s own answers on my question. 

[Dauntment]

Bro, you are 19.......lol. "Chasing a date" at that age is...diminishing imo. You would be FAR better off "getting your shit together" (physique, sense of purpose/direction for your life, financial stability, etc.) than "chasing some kitty". I slept with multiple woman at 19 (all either explicitly/implicitly) escalated to dating and I never once "asked them out"; I was "doing me" and the shit just happened. 

TL;DR - Focus on yourself.

[NoSelfSelf]

@Dauntment This belief :things just happen is really a devil,nothing just really happens, yeah sure some things do, like i just needed to wait to grow 6'4 didnt do nothing for it.

It should be imo "focus on yourself in context of dating"...

@Thewritersunion Its basically falling down eating grass until you start eating meat kind of deal.But you never try game,game is communication with yourself then outside world, so how you are with yourself is whats gonna make it or break it.Just look how you are with yourself around women there is your answer, how you communicate with yourself thats how you communicate with a woman! if you dont even know how you are around them then you are lost 🤷‍♂️ if you actually dont talk to yourself how you should talk to a woman, then you are in reaction, will never have any impact in what you saying+it wont come from you but outside situation+you thinking : "what should i say to get her" shes the focus=fear...

 

 

Edited March 19, 2024 by NoSelfSelf

[Schizophonia]

You're not attractive.

Edited March 20, 2024 by Schizophonia

[meta_male]

20 hours ago, NoSelfSelf said:

This belief :things just happen is really a devil

@Thewritersunion This. But then again, some things you can only make happen when you let go of other things. If dating stresses you out to the point you feel stuck sometimes the counter intuitive move is to focus on other aspects of life, at least until your inner state is more aligned with what you want. For now it sounds as if on one hand you don't want to date, while on the other you do. There's an inner conflict you can't solve with more dating imo. Ask yourself this: what's the worst thing that can happen to you if you take a break with dating? And what's the worst that can happen if you keep dating? The key is getting clear about what YOU want today.

[Raze]

https://www.girlschase.com/content/im-doing-everything-succeed-women-its-still-not-working

 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IIx-MfnA358