Eyal Bor

@puporing @puporing @puporing @puporing I feel I would be ok and happy with being in this relationship mono for a while, I would benefit, learn and heal. But I feel as if I'm sure it will end because I still haven't finished the exploration I want. Going into a mono "indefinite" relationship while knowing it will end feels like I'm just using her while it serves me and will get rid of her when it won't anymore, while she may get very emotionally attached and hurt in the process. If I don't think about the future and see that I enjoy and I'm happy with only the company of her right now, I feel fine .

@modmyth I've contemplated and I realized that this rejection to be mono was coming from a place of fear, not love. I was a traumatized from my ex, that it would become like that. Unprocessed feelings and repulsive feelings from just the idea of monogamy. And this need for hot girls was more of a validation thing. I realized I'm chasing those girls to feel prove myself to be worthy enough for them, but mostly to satisfy my ego, not my heart. That I'm chasing those sorts of girls because of pick-up gurus brainwashing, where hotness is the most important and almost only factor for "rating" girls. I realized that I forgot to actually set my own criteria. My criteria is believe it to be more like: how much love is in a particular girl, kindness and positive energy, while still being attractive physically. Finally what I want is to date girls to find one that could be my ideal to build something longterm. I think already sort of know that girls that prioritize A LOT the care in her looks dont interest me, but was trying to "prove myself" that is in fact not the case and that can "go back" to girls maybe less hot but with other interests, but not because I cant get them. I proposed the girl about an open deal, but she rejected it. It felt aligned with my "pick-up ego" to let her go and just continue with other girls, but my had a hard time accepting this decision, as if I was allowing my head to decide if to be with someone instead of my feelings. A lot of resistance to let her go but also to just submit to her because of fear it being toxic as my last girlfriend. After some processing I felt I released the trauma and I found myself preferring continuing seeing Tracy than to continue chasing other girls. Still trying to make sure that this decision came from actual love for this girl and not just fear of being alone, lazyness nor confort.

@puporing I have a pretty poly vision of things, but I still want to be able to be mono if I want to. I just seem to have two different identities, incompatible with each other. The pick-up me, and the boyfriend me. I'm trying to integrate them together. Longterm, probably mono is the way to go. More culturally acceptable and stable. I use poly as a way to get to know the field and scan for good possible candidates for something more long term. The problem until now is that only mono girls are the ones that want to really stick around and I actually imagine myself creating an actual life with.

Hi guys. (Long post, I appreciate if you read it all) I'm 26, and I started pick up from scratch (from never asking for a number before) like 3 years ago. During that time I had a lot of rejections, lots of progress, some very nice stories and a 1 year monogamous relationship with many lessons learned. After finishing my relationship like a year ago, had some more stories, I find myself with the possibility to enter a new monogamous relationship, but I'm scared, scared of several things: First, that since my last relationship was quite toxic, full of jealousy, insecurities and way too much attachment, I'm hesitant and traumatised of being in a "normal" relationship. I've dated this new girl (let's call her Tracy) for 2 months and she is not like that but my body still has the reflex to hide from intimacy and retracts. Second, I feel I just want to keep uping my seduction skills, so I can get the more beautiful girls. I never got the girls I'm really attracted to, (when you get the wow effect), but I havent been able to make it happen. They always have a boyfriend, or too flaky, or i don't manage to make the connection. I don't know if this is bad, it's not about making meaningful connection his , I feel maybe I just seek validation. This journey has been so rewarding from getting positive feedback, I reached better self-esteem, being worthy enough of certain girls. I feel I've been "proving myself" I'm worthy enough of girls I wasn't before. I really like this new girl Tracy, she's not a "high status 9-10", but she's sweet, full of love, quite young and inexperienced but with a pretty attractive body for me, even if she doesn't displays it like it. Feels like a full package of "relationship material" for me. I find myself in the point where I would need to reject a monogamous relationship with Tracy in order to keep progressing and trying other girls (Tracy is not into open relationships) I feel I'm getting old, and now is the time to explore different and seek all the validation I want, but the thought of me not going through further with Tracy it's killing me because I enjoy so much my time with her. It hurts me to feel I treat girls as a process and it's very hard for me to think that I'll reject a girl that I already really like (even if on paper she's not "wow"), and I can keep getting better. I kind of want to just burn through the karma first before trying more stable relationships. I feel in a hurry cause I'm getting old and shouldn't miss out, but at the same time, it was for meeting girl like Tracy that I started this journey in the first place. It was so effortless to make things happen with her and not forced and flaky as with the more beautiful girls. With more "high value" girls it just seems so forced and hard to make happen. I have to be more "bad boy" than I naturally am. Also 9-10's feel so cold temperament and not open. Are these "high value girls overvalued"? Am I just scared of commitment? FOMO? Insecurities of my own value? Am I just overthinking and should follow my feeling of being with her and forget about the future? If I'm with a girl like Tracy that is "lower value" on paper, but I really like and things flow easily than with a 9-10, i would like to know that it's because I want to be with a girl like this and not because I can't do better and Tracy it's my default. Maybe I'm just frustrated that I still don't have success with these 8 -10 and there's plenty that can I could flow easily and a also kind and full of love. I just don't like the feeling of settling short (I'm ambitious guy, perfectionist too). Maybe my status and game is simply not good enough yet, and I should have a relationships at my level (doing "pauses" in the improving process) before reaching the highest levels. And finally, when does this game end? When can you say, ok, this is good enough? Hope this was not too much writting, I just had to get it out of my chest. Thanks ?

Hello actualizers. I started learning seduction about a year ago, so I got into dating different girls, some open relationships and such, to gain some confidence and experience. The pandemic hit and I "accidentally" ended up in a monogamous relationship without planning it, with one of the girls. It started during lockdown, we gave each other company during this time which was great. She is super lovely and kind, and I'm attracted to her physically too, we had a great time but later I started realizing she was somewhat needy and she had some issues. Turns out she has very low self-esteem and a very sad/dark past, but I really care for her, wanted to support her and enjoy her company when she is in a good mood. Also, during lockdown there wasn't that much other pick-up to do either... With pandemic, she lost her job and she is feeling extra insecure about herself, being extra needy of me and crying all the time. Altough I still enjoy her company when she's happy (which right now feels only like 30-40% of the time), her mood swings can be unbearable. I really care for her (I don't think I'm ready to say LOVE her), so I just keep telling myself that this is temporary and it's gonna pass, but I was really considering breaking up with her. She hass been struggling to find a job, she's feeling so bad lately that I feel she's really draining a lot of energy from me. She's aware that it scares me away and tires me, so it makes her feel guilty and even more bad. I'm scared of breaking up with her because she has suicidal thoughts and I trully believe she's capable of hurting herself if I leave her. I don't know what do to in this situation. Again, I really care for her, she's not selfishly taking my energy, because she feels terrible that she's being like this with me, she tries really hard please me, but she's just depressed. I keep telling myself that it can get better overtime, when she finds a job...etc. At the same time a voice in me tells me to be more selfish and not give a shit about what happens to her, but that's really worring. She says she denies herself from going terapy, that all the phys just want to prescribe her pills, and the more alternative docs she can't really afford to see often cause she's running out of money and is not covered by the french insurance she has. This makes me question a few things: -What is unconditional love? aren't we supposed to practice this? To love regardless of what we get in return? -If I break up with her, it means that relationships are selfish deals, are only about what it serves me, not about caring and appreciating the other person? When everything started, no, I didn't really know what I was getting into, I probably wouldn't have gotten into it if I knew. But now since I'm in it, I feel somewhat responsable. She doesn't have much friend in the city we live in and she doesn't get along well with her family either. I feel and she feels I'm the last thing she has left and if I leave her right now, I think she could really hurt herself. Any thoughts/recommendations are deeply appreciated.

Hello guys, I've been getting into personal finance, I just got my first job and I don't want to mess up handling it my profits, I want to save up and be frugal to be able to focus on the important things (self-actualization+life purpose). I've been reading some books and everyone there's the recommendation that I should invest my saved money, so it get my money to work and grow (makes sense). So I've been getting into stock market investing, and many people suggest that if I don't want to spend too much time investigating the companies and conference calls (I got more interesting things to do), then a basic index fund with an average 9.5% return will do, so if compounds overtime and I have enough to buy a house in a decade or two, or for retirement. This sounds like an easy/confortable thing to do, but I was questioning if that's the most concious place to put my money. Afterall, with an index fund like the S&P500 I would be simply be funding quite low conciousness giants like McDonalds. My question is, isn't society evolving into Stage Green anyway? Wouldn't it be a smarter move to invest in more Stage Green companies say Tesla (which is booming right now), Beyond Meat and stuff like that. Do you know any Stage Green and Stage Yellow companies that would be much more meaningful to invest in (still not the most high conciouss but it's something) and that society will be likely will be moving towards and make big profits in the coming years? How does Stage Green/Yellow responsible personal finance look like? Thanks

Hi! I'm 24, I just graduated my studies so I just started my financial independance journey. I was wondering if theres any most-read books on money mindsets and handling finances cause I dont know shit. Thanks!

@Shin Thank you for your words. What does it mean the true masculine nature if it's not being more dominant/leading in bed? Without leading, you won't really turn her on, will you? I know the emotional part is super important in lovemaking, some of the best sex I've had has been the most emotional, but I'm looking to improve on the physical/sexual part of what makes sex great. I always try to connect with the girls anyways, and I dont really take girls in bed with which I dont feel I have some sort of emotional connection, even if it's going to be a short encounter. I watched Leo's video, so my mindset has always been to please the girl, not myself. Finding what she likes. Giving.

@modmyth maybe that's the thing, maybe I dont. I do prefer girl on top a lot more, positions with lots of skin contact (not huge fan of doggystyle for example) although I wouldnt say I like being submissive either.

@Identity I do direct game, and I'm transparent with women. I guess the most "persona" I create is showing sexual intent, I feel I make promises, and then in bed I feel I need to successfully fulfill that promise, which makes me put pressure on myself, which makes everything worse. Maybe slow down my expectatives to perform, just be where I'm at and slowly get comfortable with more wild stuff.

@Shin I got into Pick Up because I was terrible at both things, the attraction phase, so I never got to the deeper phases. I do direct game, I show my intention, I'm honest and I'm all against manipulation (TNL type). I wanted experience in the field, so went right into it. So I went from having nothing, into having choice which is amazing. But I bet a my mostly fruitarian diet really doesn't help with erections. What about the dominant side of sex? I mean, I watch a movie like 50 shades, and I just see how women crave a dominant man in bed (as well as intimate, but I feel the intimate honesty part I'm ok with it) but I guess I'll be able to be one when I actually know what I'm doing, when I explore my own body and female body with the same woman for a while. Maybe a fuckbuddy or stable open relationship will do, while I continue improving the first phases skills.

I do them some time for healing my skin reasons. They are not bad, they sound a lot worse from what they are. If you have digestion issues they can be very refreshing. You should know why you do them, and should not become dependent on them don't do them too often.

Watch the Natural Lifestyles on YouTube, they are great, honest and genuine. They have changed my life. Sasha Daygame is great too. And just push yourself, face your fears.

Hey guys, I've been getting into pick up lately and I've been getting pretty good results, I feel much more confident in approaching, talking, escalating, until I'm in bed with the girl. I dont have huge amounts of experience in bed (I'm 24), lately almost every time when I'm putting the condom on, my erection disappears. I think it has a lot to do with the pressure I put to myself to perform well since the girls I date since I started pick up are much prettier and hotter. The first two girls I ever was with were not super hot, had no pressure and no problems having an erection. So my question is: how to have great sex? I mean, if i just dont worry about it, dont push myself, I go back into a soft, nice guy not very dominant kind of sex, just the way I used to do it, but when I try to take control,I guess I get a bit nervous because I'm pushing my comfort zone but I end up losing my erection. ? Since there have been many new girls, getting to know them better and being more intimate definately helps, but, is there a way to perform well without needing to be super intimate from the beginning? Connecting only from our sexual parts and not our emotional on necessarily? Maybe my sexuality is a bit repressed, specially the dominant part? (I used to be a nice guy, and I have a soft dad). Maybe I need emotional connection for getting erections, feeling safe on showing that part of me? Any tips? Are there any books on how to have great sex? Thank you so much.

@Bluebird Thanks a lot, this is really helpful, it's what I needed. Do you feel where do these emotions get stored in your body? Gut, chest, throat? So I can try to relax the emotions that I dont want to accept.