Chadders

In the last couple of years I have experienced massive personal growth. I have gone from someone very content within my own company, working on my business and playing video games to now being a highly extroverted person. I actually did a personality test and I’ve gone from and INFJ to an ENFJ As part of my transition I sold my TV and gaming PC. I socialise so much more than I used to - it’s actually nearly all the time. I’m relentlessly active. I go boxing, swim, cycle regularly and enjoy park runs. I love the outdoors and being active. My diet is second to none. I am so much better with women now and much more confident being able to turn women on and also know what my needs are and what works for me - I’m not here to perform it’s a two way street. I met someone recently and we’re really hitting it off which is nice. But something happened two weeks ago. Going down a hill at speed I hit one of the tram tracks and came flying off my bike. I have a broken leg and wrist. I was taken into hospital and was there nearly two weeks - a week waiting for an operation! Now I’m back home. My Dad is having to look after me because I can’t manage well as I can’t put any pressure on my leg for 6 weeks. This is perhaps the hardest personal challenge I’ve had to deal with and it’s bringing face to face with my old ways because what the fuck else can I do. I wish I had my gaming PC but there’s this guilt around going back to that. I recognise that I have created a shadow out of my old self - the introvert happy playing video games and working. I am no longer that person Not really sure what I’m trying to say here but if anyone has had any similar experience it would be great to hear. Tbh even being on this forum feels like I’m reverting back - I haven’t been active on much at all until recently Additional context I had a very profound psychedelic trip (I credit psychedelics with how I have radically changed) over a month ago. It was like a warriors initiation. Not going into it but after this I just got a sense that I want to settle now. To stop taking the hard road and just be. I have been relentless over the last couple of years really pushing myself. I’m starting to feel like this accident is a way the universe has forced the breaks on me

@theleelajoker the concepts help me understand reality. I’ve found David Deida’s work very illuminating to me. There’s so much misconception around what it means to be a man and woman

I’ve been doing psychedelics for a few years now and I believe I’ve grown tremendously through them. My personality has radically changed and my world has got so much bigger The last trip I had I was on mushrooms. As with all my trips I never do them for recreation so usually they’re pretty intense. This last trip I had what felt like a warriors initiation. After the trip I just felt like Jesus I just want to settle now. I don’t want to have to keep pushing myself to take the hard road because it was an intense experience So I’ve decided that I am ready to settle now into where I am right now. To be rather than to become. Might return to them later in life - 10-20 years down the line maybe Anyone else had a similar feeling around this?

@Judy2 One incredible way to release tension in the body is to go for a wild swim. If you have a local lake nearby and the water is clean take a dip Aside from that specific example, shaking the body to get the tension out. Sitting out in nature mindfully is another

@Hardkill I definitely see the far reaching consequences of the gamified world of app dating As for the inequality between men and women in terms of matches etc, as a man you absolutely have to own your own terms in a relationship and communicate that. You have to be willing to let her go As a man I see this as the only way to redress the balance to ensure dating and relationships work for you both. You’ll find you don’t really need her you just want her and it’s important that you set your terms for a relationship if she wants to be with you. She will respect that

My heart goes out to Palestinians. The suffering is unimaginable This is one of the greatest human rights atrocities of modern times. I can’t stand how my government has done nothing to stand against the genocide going on. They’re pathetic small people

@Hojo Lol I love the overtly sexually way you have described it. Very David Deida Yeh the masculine wants to penetrate the feminine and the feminine wants to receive and open as love. Thereby they merge and you are one with everything The separation between the two is an illusion. You are divinely masculine and feminine

Hits home just how fucked we are as a human species if we don’t change track. The level of global coordination and cooperation required to shift the dial. My god Capitalism is our Achilles heel. Without spiritual growth there is no world for tomorrow that is better than the last

Hookers and cocaine

@Zen LaCroix Insight would be a better word. Yes all insights are my own. What I have said here is different to what Leo has said. David Deida’s work on masculine feminine dynamics is a foundation You would do well to be less cynical young padawan

@theleelajoker I’ve found David Deida’s work very helpful. The masculine is the awareness and the feminine is everything else (life itself). There is no life without awareness and without life awareness is nothing anyway. Awareness is the divine aspect as it is eternal and unchanged. The feminine can’t touch that. When life gets hard your ability to detach and enter the timeless moment is what gives you masculine power and you become unshakable. Again these dynamics are in both men and women but as masculine identified person I lean toward consciousness but still love life. If I didn’t I might as well be dead

I’ve had an awakening on relating to the feminine also but with added depth I would say Simply put the feminine in all of us wants to ‘play’. It enjoys the game of life. The masculine in all of us wants ‘truth’ and does not want to play a game. This is where the dance is between the masculine and the feminine. Women want to play a game and you need to be able to groove with that but only to a point - if you keep trying to play her game she’ll get bored and it’ll also deny your truth. This is where as a man within relational leadership, once you feel like you’ve had enough of the game you lead her to go deeper - basically with the game or playfulness there are layers to this and both you and her ultimately want to go deeper so you as the man communicate your truth to her. So you might say this isn’t working for me I want to go deeper with you or this would mean so much to me if we did this - it’s up to her then This is where timing is important. Too soon and she might feel unsafe or that there’s been no playfulness and if it’s too late she’ll get bored - because like with any game you will get bored of it. You will want to ultimately play a higher game by going deeper so you lead her into that This is actually where as a man you have to own your truth and your terms in a relationship. Some women will have games that are too complicated (They might have a lot of childhood trauma for instance). Some women will have games where they’re not transparent with the rules I.e. they are not very emotionally open (potentially there is an entitled expectation here about the man being everything). Whatever the case you as the man decide what you’re willing to play with the feminine. You are divine and you choose. So like with any game, you always have to be willing to walk away if her game does not work for you. This is how as a man you regain balance in a dynamic and make sure that relationally it works for both of you. This is the power of masculine leadership Just to add we all have a masculine and a feminine so even as a man you will enjoy the game but just to a lesser extent. If she’s too easy for you, you might also get bored and for a woman, she also will want truth from you as well. She doesn’t just want to stay at a surface level

Business development but going into secondary school teaching in design and technology. Specialising in wood work

This is why I like this forum. I have not heard of those practises so will be trying them out tomorrow. Thanks for sharing Any particular style of Pranayama or Qigong for grounding that you would recommend?

@Verg0 By spiritual I would see this as the pursuit to 'understand reality' - and why anybody would want to do this can only be for love whether thaqt be in the relative domain or the metaphysical I have found psychedelics to help me understand reality through an elevation and change of consciousness. They're definitely a great tool