Thunder Kiss

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  1. @Kubia I see. It’s not love it’s unhealthy attachment. It sounds like she’s trauma bonded to you! I’ve been on that position before. Best thing you can do is give it a clean break, no contact and don’t give in at the first chance of sex. If you really don’t want any commitment with her then you need to be ‘strong’ and not blindly have sex with her. She will think if you sleep with her you’ll eventually change your mind. Anyway it’s not very healthy, you gotta try and be the responsible one here, it might seem like just sex but it’s probs lowering her self esteem each time coz she knows you don’t want anything serious with her. Of course I’m speculating could be wrong, but that’s what it seems like.
  2. Well if girl 2 has any sense she won’t take you back after you dropped her as soon as girl 1 came back. leave girl 2 alone, don’t mess with her feelings.
  3. Ridic. Really pisses me off, it’s like everyone is being forced to take only the mRNA ones now. What, now most people are vaccinated or recovered Pfizer isn’t making enough money so is looking for other ways to get more jabs into people, lol. Will there be an apology to all those people who were told Johnson was good enough?
  4. I’m wondering if anyone knows of any life coaches in training who are looking for people with whom they can ‘practice’ on to better their skills? thanks
  5. Don’t be fooled into thinking your young years are better to find a partner, you realise that would be based solely on your appearance right? Even if you do find someone to settle down with in your 20s nothing guarantees that he won’t leave you once you ‘hit 30 and loose your looks’ unfortunately. Infact the younger you settle down the quicker you will age, through child birth and late nights from rearing children and having no time for yourself. finding the right person is more important than finding someone to settle down with out of fear. You will continue living in fear in the relationship because the reality is that you will get older and your looks will change, nothing you can do about that except take care of yourself and try make peace with that. Make peace with that and then you will attract someone who isn’t shallow and into you only for how you look, someone who is wise and appreciates the wisdom and inner beauty of a woman as she ages. otherwise you will feel even worse and more fearful once your looks do fade. If you do want to settle down young then try travelling to other towns to try and meet people.. that is IF you want to settle and live in one place. I would say move to a city, but even that won’t guarantee anything because the chances are higher that people living in cities aren’t looking for any serious commitments. It’s actually harder to find love in a city, which is why guys are recommended to go to cities to pickup women and practice on them. but there is always a chance to find a diamond in the rough. Your best bet is travelling to other countries and spontaneously meeting someone on your travels whom you form a connection with. Don’t think to much about needing to find someone, that will also make you more needy and you’ll end up attracting unavailable people. Practice self love and making peace with yourself and you will radiate love out. Divine feminine women are created over time, You can be a beautiful and classy, glamourous and wise old lady. And the people who matter will see that and appreciate you for you.
  6. I was so disconnected from my parents. I forgive them. I don’t hold any anger towards them. Only feel regret at my own choices. I feel like it has always been me, making decisions, alone, since being a kid. I’ve always had trouble with decision making. ive always been so ‘in my own world’ I believe I had signs of ADD, but being a girl in the 2000s, that wasn’t a thing. Only unruly boys were diagnosed. During class I would basically be tranced out the whole time. attention deficit - deficit of attention. Meaning lack of attention. it stems from not getting enough attention from your caregiver, trancing out and disassociation used as a coping mechanism. It’s easier to zone into your own world when you already feel invisible and unseen. if you don’t get enough attention as a child counterintuitively, you will lack that detail as an adult. If you don’t get enough attention, you might also ‘act out’ to try and get what you are starving for, but too afraid to ask for.
  7. Just a ramble about the past When I think of my times as a teenager Between the ages of 14-17 I feel shame and fear. I was easily influenced by friends and used to pretty much do what I wanted secretly and my mother was always oblivious and I would never get in trouble or disciplined if I was ‘bad’ She would just be in denial about it. My dad worked away and even if he was home he wouldn’t get involved with me. I went downhill fast in Highschool, living a very stage red life, skipping school and drinking and occasionally doing drugs. I used to smoke cigarettes and hash out of my bedroom window. One time my mother found the home made can ‘pipe’ and simply just told me that she was disappointed in me, and then confiscated it. but then that was it, swept under the rug. So I just did it again and didn’t care. When I think of all the situations I got myself in ‘in secret’ without any adults knowing I feel afraid at how vulnerable I was and how anything could have happened to me. For example getting really drunk or staying out all night. I remember all those times having a ‘bad feeling’ of not wanting to be in those places but still going out of boredom. It was early 2000s. I would get away with alot of things because I was a polite and quiet kid. I was never disruptive in class I was just misbehaving behind the scenes. Double life. Acting innocent on the outside but drawn to the dark side of life. I feel some regret at being that way and wish I’d had some guidance, but I really felt invisible and didn’t care about stuff. I hated school and just wanted to leave as soon as I could. God I wish I’d had a mentor or someone i could open up to, but I kept everything to myself and had no clue what I was doing. I felt really lost back then and I’ve carried that lost feeling with me my whole life.
  8. ‘Repeat booster doses every four months could eventually weaken the immune system and tire out people, according to the European Medicines Agency.’ https://www.google.ae/amp/s/wap.business-standard.com/article-amp/international/covid-19-pandemic-frequent-boosters-can-weaken-immunity-says-eu-122011201707_1.html?fbclid=IwAR2SZuFh88joU2IuF3k4DqxQu0P_LLooFwX7Cut_tAmhCpyvjuMe01fwa4Y More data coming back regarding vaccine and menstrual cycle: https://m.dw.com/en/opinion-after-covid-vaccine-menstruation-findings-a-sigh-of-relief-and-indignation/a-60406613?fbclid=IwAR22pFGT4H0dRKRJnunCpIQ_9XFHCAnBy-c0UViPkXRlVJRt2hLasQYYRfU
  9. @Bobby_2021 just out of curiosity, what led you to this dating forum that is very stage orange and centred around promoting pickup and sleeping with lots of women? Is that something you are also interested in?
  10. I feel like everyone’s into personal development now. It’s trendy. Personal development used to be for people 30+ Who had exhausted their party years and ready to settle down and do some soul searching. now 12 year olds are doing personal development and I’m over hearing conversations on public transport about how he/she/they are into personal development and working on themselves. it’s the new normal. Everyone feels like they need to ‘be somebody’ to prove something. I know it’s always been that way but just seems like it’s going to an extreme now with social media etc. and to some degree it’s nice that people have all this information now and want to be the best version of themselves, but then to some degree it’s also making people more neurotic and creating more perfectionism. Perfectionism will never bring you to peace. I wonder what’s next.
  11. you don’t need to have physical sex to explore your sexuality. There is a difference between fantasising about sex, and actually doing the physical act. It is true that children have a curiosity around sexuality and experience arousal at very young age. I remember my first feelings of arousal around the age of 5 when I was playing with Barbie and Ken, and had created a romantic story between them and making them kiss eachother. I had orgasmic feelings, didn’t understand what it was, only that it felt warm and fuzzy. I also remember being curious about nakedness and would have feelings of excitement and arousal when playing imaginary childhood games that involved any kind of romance. I remember us playing a game where I instigated that my sister who was about 7 at the time should be a naked princess wrapped in a blanket and I was a prince coming to rescue her. I was like 9 or something. It was all innocent and imaginary fun, and romance based. It was never about actual physical sex. I used to have sleep orgasms entering puberty and I guess I started realising I could masturbate around age 12. I didn’t know exactly what I was doing but it was all from imagination and I was exploring my own body, and realising that if I touched certain places that I would be aroused and eventually orgasm. Although I didn’t know that it was an orgasm at the time. It was one of my secrets, I had found a treasure of how to make myself feel warm and fuzzy inside. Lol. Does any of this mean that I would want physical sex with a man? Hell NO. Could an adult man have taken advantage and manipulated those feelings, if I was unfortunate to be subjected to an unsafe environment ? Yes. a man could have made up some romantic story to get me to do stuff with him. Which is a common theme with child molesters, they use romance and love to get a child to ‘fall in love’ with them. I certainly didn’t want any physical or penetrative sex with another. It was my own private exploration of my own body and feelings, my sexual curiosity to have with myself and myself alone. Just because a child has these feelings and thoughts doesn’t mean they are ready mentally or physically for sex. let children be children and explore their own bodies without older adults feeling entitled to their bodies.
  12. Yes. The confusing thing about the test is that it asks you to remember how it was for you as a child, and to answer from that place. Even though you may have already worked through all of that and forgiven your parents. here is a better test to see where you are at now.. Attachment type test
  13. Disorganised/fearful avoidant. I’ve actually come a long way, I used to be highly anxious when I learned about attachment types years ago. I swung from being anxious to being avoidant - probably as a coping mechanism. I still have anxiety in some areas, and am working on being less avoidant and facing things, opening up etc. i’m close with my mam but totally disconnected from my dad. I got the anxiety from my mother and the avoidance from my dad. In my current relationship i’m mostly secure, with some fear of intimacy.(avoidance)
  14. Thankyou for saying this. It’s quite sad when people here hold this view that women would cheat with a scumbag because she’s just a dumb unconscious chick running solely on emotions. —- Personally I don’t think what you are saying is a huge problem. Yes it’s a very popular dynamic in pickup community and the party scene. Within the pickup community and because that is what we see written here on this forum so much, that doesn’t mean that everyone is like this or that this is how it is. There are plenty of men out there who aren’t interested in pickup or one night stands. There has always been players and womanisers throughout history. Only difference is that now it’s more documented online. If anything I think more men are waking up and maturing, they are dealing with their intimacy issues and growing. It’s also not true that women receive floods of candidates. Yes maybe if you are thinking of an Instagram influencer or models then yes they probably get a lot of spam guys pestering them. But seriously this is not the real world.. most girls aren’t getting that many guys hitting on them. And that doesn’t mean they are ugly low value girls, they are just not in the party scene so don’t get noticed as much.