mandyjw

"Why is a raven like a writing-desk?"

Guys, watch the video in Leo's blog. https://www.actualized.org/insights Since he has a huge following of intelligent heath and fitness nuts and self-actualizers who care about him he gets an overwhelming amount of health advice.

Oh my God, what did I just read?

Does somebody need a hug?

Maybe, but I think it's important to put things in context and understand that people don't interact in front of cameras the same way that they do in real life. The real fulfillment of sex and love to me is about finding someone you can drop the persona you've built up with. It's the freedom of letting go of it. Building it up for the entertainment of others is kinda like those commercials where they purposefully spill food on clothes to show off how well their stain remover works. Entertainment ans business in all kinds of forms has built up huge expectations for sex and relationships on both the part of men and women. Actually having a real fulfilling relationship is being smart at separating out what you truly desire deep down from what you've been conditioned to think you should want.

Women/people in general blush when they are genuinely uncomfortable or when someone completely controls the conversation. My sister once dated the much older general manager of a resort she worked at and I met him when I went to visit her there. She had arranged for a private table for us and he joined us unexpectedly and grilled me the entire time about my sister. He was a powerful guy and he was also completely out of the realm of what would have been appropriate behavior. When we went into the bathroom after dinner we were both shocked that both our faces were beat red. I will blush and be sweet to men when inwardly my skin is crawling. It's almost like a survival instinct.

They are talented confident people but it's all just for show, mild flirting. No chemistry. It's all just how they've learned to interact. A lot of these clips have much more to do with people's careers than their ability to really connect with people. Career,confidence and attraction go hand in hand but real attraction and chemistry has a powerful pull far beyond what you'll see when you watch people interact in entertainment.

@Akemrelax Nope, don't actually find him attractive at all.

Still something missing though. Man mocks everyone in the room for putting on a show, while he ironically puts on an even bigger display. Pretty sure 95% of the people actually in the room for him are quite annoyed. Problem is his jokes are often at someone else's expense. It's great charisma, humor and assertiveness but feels ever so slightly... ick to watch.

Ok, that explains a lot. I've really loved watching Tim Ferriss evolve over time too.

@Leo Gura Yep that's pretty brilliant. Laughing is such a release of tension, he literally puts on the table what everyone is thinking and kinda sorta uncomfortable about the situation but generally try and fail to ignore. A lot of humor is just finding what people are tense about in any given situation and bringing it to light with complete and utter disregard for it.

The first Russel Brand interview I watched was bad, so it's funny to hear him talked about an this perfect example of extroversion here. It was this one. He couldn't connect with her at all, basically ended up mocking her a bit. I laughed a few times but overall it left a lot to be desired.

@iceprincess Sorry for turning your thread into a musical.

Oh shit. I just realized I completely misunderstood the concept of a servitor. Huh. I read a book by a clairvoyant doctor who seemingly awakened through a series of hypnotherapy sessions, he had an obsession with them. The power of another's focus and matched desires for awakening can be tremendous. The apple had to be ripe to fall though.

@iceprincess Hugs honey. I think the best place to start is with a whole lot of self love. Also make the intention to find the right man screen carefully for one who will take the time to unravel real intimacy. In the meantime work on your psychology and confidence. Yin yoga and bellydance are great for releasing trauma and repressions.

@iceprincess It's about vulnerability. First you have to pick a man you can really be vulnerable with.

@DrewNows

@Bazooka Jesus Have you discovered the one they recorded that was written by Charles Manson yet? I was creeped out for days about that. lol My parents were conservative Christians so they thought the Beatles were the devil. "Imagine there's no heaven..." BLASPHEMY. Super funny to me now. This is my favorite Beatles song now, super appropriate for this thread. It wasn't SUPPOSED to be about LSD, just inspired by his son's artwork. I believe he really was honest about that, but also there aren't any coincidences.

@Bazooka Jesus I've always loved that song. Lyrics are actually kinda funny backwards though.

Hmm... how updated? I'm still really skeptical. Seems like nothing good in my life has ever came from following the news or polls. It was such a roller coaster towards the end in 2016. Didn't seem possible that Mr. "You can do anything" would become the next president of the US. I thought I was watching the news to be educated and really it was just feeding my own naiveté, fears and wishful thinking... somehow all of those at once. Once bitten twice shy.

What was the context? Is he talking about arrogance or complacency? From just the sentence I think he's talking about arrogance. Abraham Hicks is absolutely amazing if you like Napoleon Hill.

I can tell you the story that I had the best childhood in the entire world or a horrifically awful one without lying to you either time. Your memories and the meaning behind them follow your mood, focus, intentions and what you imagine yourself to be. They are entirely fluid.

I made a video yesterday. It's weird how almost every time I hike that trail whether I make a video or not it's a trip. I really, really, really wanted some chanterelle mushrooms but haven't found any yet, but there was a patch of them on the trail and I came back and sauteed them with some kale and carrots from the garden. Today I worked on a new project and listened to a little more Jim Newman. He said that he feels that the teaching is about permission and even though I had heard that before it hit me and connected with a lot that I had been contemplating and feeling and an insight I had from making the video the day before. I'm always looking for permission to be ok, to be told I'm doing the right thing, looking for permission outside. The impulses to confess and the love for teachers, the hard parts of the relationships I've had working with people. The workaholism, the need to be debt free, be financially successful, the need for my art to sell quickly for me to enjoy doing it, the need to be thin, to be liked. The need to be "mindful" (...the fuck does that mean anyway?), the need to be enlightened, the need for other people to recognize this as such. I knew about survival and seeking security, but didn't realize that deep down what I was seeking was permission from Myself. I wanted permission both to be a somebody and permission to not have to be somebody. I wanted permission to go for my deepest and highest reaching dreams, to feel my most honest feelings and permission to let go of everything that is not the eternal now. I wanted permission to let go of the concept and "should" of the consciousness of the "eternal now" (...the fuck does that mean anyway?). Beware of taking so seriously words that start with P E R, perspective, permission, perception, performance, perfection, they all require a person.

@Don Wei I think your hair looks great now, it still looks good with the buzz cut except for your obviously miserable facial expression. You're gonna do awesome. Honestly, in my opinion the only thing you have working against you if anything at all, is that you're only 18. So much of "masculinity" and just general confidence comes with experience, especially if you're conscious about the experiences you seek out and eager to learn and grow by observing yourself and others. One of the traps we fall into when we're really young (or older ) is thinking too much about ourselves and worrying about how others see us. Everyone is so busy doing that that no one actually pays much attention to anyone else. It can be really enlightening to observe others and those thoughts about yourself without judgement or self-consciousness.