Nick_98

Ok Can I tell you small story about myself. I also thought I had a lot of characteristics about myself that couldn't be changed. I got diagnosed earlier this year that I am highly rated on the schizoid type personality disorder scale. If you don't know what that is here is a summary. "Schizoid Personality Disorder (SPD) means a person has a deep-seated detachment from social relationships and a very limited range of emotional expression, often appearing aloof, distant, or cold, preferring solitary activities, and showing little interest in romance or praise/criticism, living mostly in an internal fantasy world" I searched about that disorder and the people that it can NOT be solved. Only in very rare cases. It was written that personality can't in a lifetime form relationship. Guess what happened ? Later this year I've turned into a very extroverted person, Every day I say good morning to people and I'm happy to be around them. I thought that the problem is UNSOLVABLE, that it is what it IS . But Now looking back at the psychological descriptions I realized I was speculating it is unsolvable. I can change. But let me be honest. I am not sure that you can change. but in my experience I have changed and that what makes me ambitious that you as well can change. You can be social again, you can be lovable, you can enjoy meeting other people again. Leo Here is an exercise for you Imagine you are living on an Island and sitting there doing kriya yoga. You notice in the horizons a boat and some people on this boat were waving at you. They want you to join them on the boat. You decide to ignore them , under the bias that they are group thinkers, rats, stupid etc.. and You sit there with the goal of attaining god’s intelligence and ignore them completely. I’m talking about this attitude. This attitude damages your psychological well being, because as human I know that from experience you want to belong. Look at children they always want to join each other, they don’t want to be alienated. It’s rarely a case where you see a child that sits there alone and ignore other children. It’s usually because of some bias they have like they hate me, they are stupid, etc.. So now Imagine me on that boat, I’m waving at you.. I want you to join me. Would you please join me ? BTW LEO. you don’t have to believe my bullshit , you can just join me and not judge me. Imagine if I am a religious blinded person, don’t judge me but join me on the boat. I KNOW you need to belong. That will boost your psychology, you would be 10 times better if you joined other people even if you think deep down inside they are not intelligent and are group thinkers. Would you join me Leo? Or will you ignore me completely? Also no pressure , since you explained to me your character traits. I HIGHLY respect that. I wish you all the best.

You’re making a great point. Your intelligence is astonishing. ok but Leo, then you have chosen the hard route to deal with others, isn’t it ? I believe that over time that might hurt your psychological well being. You don’t have to trust me just notice that we are born to belong and feel that we agree to each other. You are sacrificing one important point here and that’s inclusion and group think. I know that from your perspective this is some children games compared to truth seeking. BUT you are a human or in other words WE live inside the human dimension. We need to belong together, you’re choosing the opposite. And that might hurt your psychological well being. Don’t underestimate the game of humans It’s needed for you and me to be Happy. Dropping that is shooting yourself in the foot. What do you think about these ideas ? You’re creating for yourself a mental labour that in my opinion is unnecessary, I know skepticism got you far in terms of finding your spiritual self. But it won’t help you if you try to fulfil your human needs. You need to belong. You are doing the opposite to belonging. And just the fact that you are running this forum and post on it everyday tells me you are still a human. You need it to belong to feel included to feel validated, to feel you are somewhat somehow something in the society. If you wake up one day and this forum is gone, it will fall at your psychology like a tornado, you will start to feel distress, un validation and like your life purpose is coming to an end. so that’s what I’m taking about, I know that me and you know that we need to feel that we belong. Why choose the hard route ? Again.. this might hurt your psychi it’s not going to be good for it. It’s unnecessary. i’m open to hear your opinion on that

I really like your outlook. And i want you to elaborate more on this sentence.

There’s something I don’t understand. If you are an embodiment of truth or if you have attained higher state of consciousness why would you always be defensive about yourself I thought that the closer you become with god’s consciousness the less you would try to disagree with people. But Leo’s Ego is climbing up a mountain, through levels I have never seen in a human, it’s like a balloon that keeps increasing in size but doesn’t burst! It’s astonishing. Leo Please don’t take this critique personally, I’m trying to make sense of your own character I have all respect for you as a person, but this trait I noticed and I don’t understand it. I understand we are all flawed individuals, but leo since years has been conducting arguments with people on the forum and rarely agrees with another person even tho he can easily do that, why does he choose the route to prove that himself is right ? But if I achieve a god state of consciousness of course I will tell other people ok on everything, I won’t care about my Ego, I won’t be defensive. So does this defensiveness hides something we don’t know about ? Maybe the fact that they achieved greater states causes their inner ego to be more defensive than a regular person ? I don’t get it. Someone has explanation ? Leo do you notice that in your character ? Do you believe you are always being defensive ? Or do you think my observation is wrong ? Do not take it personally

I really have no understanding of consciousness whatsoever but for me I describe it as Silence

Wow. I like your explanation. Thanks!

That’s a nice question. You need a calculator to solve that issue you need to take the heights of all individuals and divide it by their total

I don’t regret it because I did it. You need to experience travelling solo.

First of all I want to highlight this. You don’t have to approach women. You just don’t. How to approach women? make eye contact with them Say Hi. if making eye contact with them or saying hi doesn’t come naturally to you, or you don’t feel comfortable doing so. Maybe it’s just not for you to approach women, it was designed for someone else. i know my words for you could’ve been disappointing. But really think about it with an open mind, why do you “have” to do anything ? Right ? once again *make eye contact* *Say Hi* congratulations you just approached a woman. the problem with pick up is that it tries to shove all the people with their different types under the same grinder. You have to figure it out if it’s natural for you to approach a woman or not. And decide accordingly.

This critique goes to teachers like eckhart tolle, sadhguru, etc.. They try to neglect the fact that you’re a human, or at least inside that state of consciousness. They keep giving you advices on how to awaken how to enlighten etc.. but underestimate the fact that you are a human. Many treat being a human as something lesser important than their mission. ok i understand that you’ve acquired a higher state of consciousness, but what are the consequences for students like me ? I spent years of my life neglecting my psychological well being for spiritual pursuit. Your psychological well being is more important than your spiritual achievements. You were born to BELONG, to feel included, to be happy , to succeed socially and internally. Spiritual teachers neglect this side , they keep talking about the mind as something is wrong with it. They tell you life is suffering. That’s not true. Life is not suffering. Their outlook on life makes life a suffering playground. When you are constantly trying to escape your state of consciousness, which is beneath god of course you’ll be suffering. You’re damaging your psychological wellbeing by chasing something that requires a superhuman like Leo to achieve. why is this post ? This post is to remind you to not neglect your psychological well being. Your psychological well being is very important, for your overall functioning and YES you can be happy without gaining spiritual insights. I know a lot of people that are really happy and they never heard a word from eckhart tolle or sadhguru, some of them are even religious and some of them are blinded by lies but at the end of the day they are happy. Their psychological well being is not in trouble it’s intact. And THAT is what really matters. Living a safe psychologically well established life is the goal. Being Sane is the Goal. You would reap great benefits if you focus on your psychological well being first. Then you can sit and meditate but that should be secondary not primary. Hope you have a good one

thank you. Before the anger arises I feel un comfort especially when he shows up or start speaking. When I focus on that un confort I realise that just the fact that he is speaking is for me irritating, the words that come outside his mouth immediately initiate that feeling of discomfort. The problem is I tried to focus on what happened before that discomfort arise and the problem is. I can’t be more aware than that. I take my breaths and follow my body but still do not unravel anything deeper. My awareness is trapped on the fact that all I remember is that his words and presence make me suddenly uncomfortable. Then after that the anger starts to show up. Lol !

Nice Nice. Also I want to add that whenever he speaks I feel uncomfortable. It’s like my brain or I am wired to think of him as an enemy. Lol. I never experience that with other people even if they talk shit. i think the Quraan knew about this.. that is why it was mentioned in Islam to treat your parents nicely. Maybe they have seen this event coming as a challenge for each individual , that their parents could be a challenge. i don’t know. i’m just bluffing ! but if I just treat every situation like the people advised, to move out to leave the house etc.. that wouldn’t be a life that would just be me trying to escape reality and my own demons! And I know they will chase me somehow somewhere else, in the workplace , with my partner, my children etc.. so I’m trying to overcome this inner demon not run away from it. I believe so far I am doing a great job. just the fact that till this day we maintain a relationship that is OK is a success for me. I’m very proud about myself. That really is boosting my self esteem. but yall have been great! Thanks for your advices. I hope you have a wonderful year

I’ve done that in the past and still do. I let these thoughts arise without acting on it. When I said he makes me angry I didn’t mean I express this anger out I just meant the emotion of anger arises

I guess that’s what I’ve actively let myself do for the past two years but did yield small improvements

Hmmm thanks.