StarStruck

So I have been offline for some time. This is what kept me busy: I started taking salsa dancing classes. It is a great source to meet people, to get better with dancing which helps with confidence and being lose I discovered that I'm uptight in my body, girls pointed this out to me and this is just something I would never discover intellectually David Hawkins stuff is paramount for me: I level bellow 200. It is not weird that I'm not having great success. Haven't done any approaches because I keep getting the same result: getting date and girls losing interest in me because of my LOC, why would I keep hurting myself with approaches? I will stop approaching until I reached LOC 200-250 I started doing brainspotting and in the near future I will start with primal therapy I discovered that Transactional analysis is great for analyzing approaches/interactions in general! Before reading about transactional analysis I was blind about human interaction! Just read David Hawkins stuff and just go out in the field!

Develop your own sexual power so you won't be intimidated by other girl's sexual power.

Usually girls get bored by me although they tell me I'm such a good guy because I'm so nice as a person. So I got enough of that and I started experimenting with being a dick. And I noticed that girls love a dick. The ones I was being a dick too clearly hate me and they are also massively attracted to me. It is like this: hate on the front, attraction behind the front. The problem is this: I don't know how to deal with this situation. I clearly get attraction. I know this because when I ignore them they start hitting on me and trying to push my buttons. So how to talk to a girl who both hates you and feels attracted to me? In the past I just tried to "be myself" and I just lose the frame and act beta. Currently she just wants to pick fights with me. I want to enter the talking stage which requires her to show me basic respect. I don't have her phone number yet.

What is this INTP ESTJ talk? Is there a book on the book list that I missed?

Banter is just being playful. Being playful is not limited to humans. Animals do it too but obviously not verbally. Just imagine tiger cubs playing with each other. Humans do the same but they do it with words.

What I noticed about banter from people who are good at it: Their "darts" are aimed at the other They don't take anything personal and expect that from the other side The whole spiel is to feel how much you can push the envelope to find the edges/borders of what is allowed to be said and what is not allowed to be said

I read a lot of books about archetypes and his book is the best on the subject. He also has some books on the specific archetypes. For example one of his book specifically focuses on the magician archetype. Unfortunately those book are out of press and you can only find low quality pdfs. There are some rare copies on the internet but it is like 150-250 for a second hand copy.

It will be like a butcher trying to do a heart surgery if you don't know what you are doing.

I have great respect for the sufi order and rumi. Other than that I don't have a high regard for islam although my family background is islamic.

Perhaps you shouldn't expect them to understand you. It is not because they don't want to, they aren't capable. You have to show them you are happy, that is the most important thing you can show them. If they can sense you have no boundaries they will try to trespass your boundaries and try to control you.

Orange has higher intelligence and technology.

So there is nothing one can do other than take a break?

If you find a good christian girl she might have the patience.

The only party that provided from this event is Russia. They got to spread their forces in a former soviet country and get influence. And at the same time sabotage Chinese and Turkish sphere of influence. Especially the energy pipeline between the turkic countries (aka silk road) are now in danger with Russian troops on the ground.

I tried swimming in the rijn river. It was too hard for me to do it again.

It shouldn't be an either or question. Personally I try to balance between work and play. From a productivity standpoint you need both. Same counts for the existential standpoint. The difficult part is to find the right balance between seriousness and non seriousness. I'm definite somebody who leans towards the seriousness. The way to solve that is to get in touch with the inner child.

It is really sad to hear this.

Be grounded in yourself. Listen to your feelings about not wanting to be captain save a hoe. Also see the pattern. You are obviously trying to fix something in yourself by trying to fix a girl. That is the core problem. Delve into that. Girl should be adding something to your life. A lot think they add enough just by being pretty.

So soon I will be forced to change my therapist. She will be making a career switch. I was with her for little over a year. She helped me with becoming more social, getting productive, getting centred as a person and trauma processing. When looking back at my therapy with her I came to the conclusion that she really didn't help me. I helped myself. I read the books, did the work, did the journaling and meditation. She was only there to give me mental and emotional support which I don't take for granted. It was definitely something I didn't have and something that I needed. She has her credentials: bachelor, master and PHD. And I was shocked how uneducated she was. She didn't knew anything about Freud or Jung. Why? Because her teachers never asked her to study the topics. Why did she even study psychology for almost a decade? All she does is ask me how I feel about things. I never caught her giving me ground breaking advice or any advice really. And when I explicitly asked her advice I could observe that she was getting irritated which is typical for woman since they like to talk about problems but not solve them. I'm so confused what to look for in a therapist. I need somebody who can help me weed about my social quirks like codependency, coach me with productivity, and self-confidence. People on this forum told me I needed to develop more of my anima so I went for a female therapist but perhaps I made a mistake?

A lot of insights in that video

He likes to talk. Obviously he has a business to run so I understand his sleaziness. In one of his old seminars he refuse to call meditation meditation because his Christian clients would get upset because meditation is linked to Buddhism.

Happy new year guys. I hope 2022 will be a fruitful year for all of us! As for my progress with pickup: I totally turned inwards to fight my inner demons. Everything that manifests in the outer starts from the inner. Looking back to my first posts... wow, I made such a huge progress. It was a lot of strain and I'm still not where I want to be but considering my situation it is not weird that I don't have the results I want. If anything, pickup has painfully pointed out that I have to look within. I'm gaining huge grounds in this respect thanks to depth psychology, energy from the archetypes, and self-reflection.

LOL, I recommend you read his bio. There is not such a big different between Arnold and Dan. Both conned their way to success.

No problem. I agree with @Lyubov . Therapists are there for my self reflection and to establish my own axis mundi. Last year I had wrong expectations about therapy. I believed it was a magic pill but it is not. In the book "a mind for numbers" they talk about focused attention and defuse attention. Those two concepts helped me to be somewhat less OCD but I still have it because it is so ingrained. I loved to intellectualize and miss the broader perspective. It is a learning problem for me across the board in my professional and personal life. I use this intellectualism as a harness. It prevents me from breaking into my emotional repression barrier and everything becomes dull and stale. This obviously is a big problem when dating but in therapy I'm doing the same. They call this emotional impotence or emotional flatland. It just need somebody who understands these topics. My current therapist just didn't have clue. She doesn't address it and just do her thing (procedures). I guess I just have to keep trying it with different therapists. She was my first therapist so I was kind of emotionally depended on her. I know the therapy office isn't a lecture about Freud and Jung. I just can't help myself. By the way, those are not the only books I read. I mostly read up-to-date books on depth psychology.

@Nahm I meant last paragraph. Not lady paragraph. I have never thought about the difference between the feeling and thought of being understood. Being understood feels great but that is not why I go to therapy. I also want the therapist to understand me on a mental level and help me out. My current therapist showed me a lot of compassion but she didn't understand me mentally and didn't help me out. Although her showing compassion did help me somewhat. I have to give her that.