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Everything posted by SQAAD

  1. @ajasatya I don't understand. Why if i kill my wife, my grandchildren will be affected?? Doesnt't make sense. Why my grandchildren have to suffer because of me, because of my actions? This sounds very depressing...
  2. The last week i built a habit of going outside everyday in Nature with a pen and a journal. I sit somewhere alone and i contemplate about my psychological issues. Questions like "Why do i care about peoples opinion?" - "Why do i overeat?" and other stuff that bothers me. I was very much surprised to end up with unexpected answers that i didn't even think/imagine before. A lot of it stems from my childhood and culture programming. Things that i didn't even consider/realise ever before in my life!! Anyways the potential of contemplation is HUGE. This week alone i got more clarity about myself than i did the last year alone. Stuff that bothered me for years now suddenly doesn't. I am mind-blown. I guess this is what psychotherapy does. Just knowing a bunch of concepts does not help you. Most people nowadays know a bunch of stuff & still they are underdeveloped and dysfunctional. You gotta DO THE WORK otherwise your DON'T CHANGE. 1% THEORY 99% WORK. Theory alone DOES not change you.
  3. @Serotoninluv Certainly will do that. Already doing it to a smaller degree though.
  4. @Recursoinominado @dinone @mmKay @Serotoninluv Thank you! I wish people were nicer to each other, encouraging each other more in our daily "real word" lifes. Too much unconsciousness and egotism (at least where i live). This forum is a very good place.
  5. I'm getting sick & tired of Spiral Dynamics Stage Orange... Today i did contemplate outside in Nature & i realised that this neurotic desire to be the best at what i do was imprinted to me by society & is not what my authentic self really wants. I just want to be the best version of myself & have Peace of Mind first and foremost! I don't care no more being better than other egos. It is really draining me psychologically all this comparing BS. Why all the ego want to be the best? What are the mechanics behind this neurotic behaviour? From my observations being the best does not make you any more ore less happy. It is a distraction.
  6. @Anna1 Yes you are right. For me clinging to being the best or clinging being the worst is the same neurotic behaviour. The ego wants to feel special in both ocassions.
  7. @universe I see everywhere around me people who have more that they can ask for in terms of survival and still they are never satisfied. If you have 10 million dollars then the ego-mind will want to compete with those who have billions of dollars. You have a 100.000 subscribers? Now you want 1 million subscribers. You are champion in your sport? Now you want to be remembered as the best ever, you care about your fictitious legacy. If you have a nice body, then you take steroids to compete with those are more gifted than you. If you have a nice wife, still you wanna bang other women. It is never enough for the ego. Never.
  8. @Inliytened1 Thank you! It is never enough though for the ego-mind.
  9. @Conrad Well i am not playing the game of being the best anymore. Best body, best author, best meditator, best eyes, best legs, best music, best retreat , best food, best female, best book, best programmer, best speaker etc. It's an absurd obsession. Stage Orange tells you all the time to be the best . It all about being the best. If you are not the best then you are a loser . And if you are the best then you are still as empty inside. But this is a game you cannot win longterm (being the best).
  10. @Serotoninluv Thank you sir!
  11. @Shin I want to write more things about my no fap journey.
  12. @Serotoninluv How do i keep updating my journal here? Is it ok to just post comments here ? Thanks.
  13. I want to be more intuitive but i struggle to do so because i can't distinguish it. Is intuition a feeling? How do you distinguish intuition from your regular feelings?
  14. @Serotoninluv Is there a better life purpose than another from an absolute view? Martin Ball said something along the lines that there is no life purpose really. Btw i am all about life purpose because it makes my life significantly better.
  15. @ivankiss Crazy mind-blowing experience!! I want some of that too. What did you do to reach that level of consciousness?
  16. @Leo Gura Many times i feel like my feelings are deluding me big time. It's difficult to trust my feelings...
  17. @Serotoninluv I want my intuition to help me win the lottery.
  18. I came across an interesting article. Some of the critiques on positive psychology are: Whole article here --> http://www.thenegativepsychologist.com/the-downside-of-rational-psychology/
  19. @How to be wise Can you suggest me any techniques for undoing belifes? Thanks.