inFlow

My awakening process has been going quite well now, god consciousness is present at most times. Now I noticed that the body doesn't crave sex anymore. It's as if I killed it somehow, detached from it, or the consciousness grew so much that I can control my body cravings for sex. And it started to bother me a bit, cause my spouse is still in the ego-self craving for sex and acceptance and to me it's as if I don't need anything to be happy, I get something - it's OK, if I don't get anything - it's also OK. I can choose to have sex, but the craving is just gone. I don't find it bad or something, but it's as if my consciousness has over-powered the body. My question would be to all the other beings who have gone through this. Do you get used to it? I do wanna let go of sex for some YET unknown reasons, it feels like sex is low consciousness business.

I still can't understand this. There is fear, but who or what is getting feared? Would like to get a spiritual answer. Thank you.

@Serotoninluv can you transcend fear? Does fear grow smaller with consciousness growth?

@Joker_Theory @SOUL thank you <3

@Serotoninluv well I didnt panic and react to the fear a lot, but yet there was fear, so I just thought why is there fear, I can feel it but why IS it? And what is so being feared? Actually I observed that I was in fear and it kinda made me think how can I overcome it. Or is fear just the same as happyness? Just the different meaning my mind projects thus getting different cause/effect?

@Waken Yes there is nobody, but still there is fear somehow. Terrible fear of death and not being "here" with everyone else. I had a psychedelic trip recently where I talked with myself and I understood how much of a devil I was, and it felt like the self was confessing how much it was a devil to God. I confessed every shit and suffering that I made to others, that I was no angel and I had to go through a lot. And when I said that I have done so much shit to everyone else then It felt like I had an insight that all my karma was inside my body somewhere locked up. This conversation with myself shook my body so much, I started to shake very rapidly and I felt that heat was being generated with that shaking, and that shaking was so deep, like to the bone. Even my heart rate went up to like 130 BMP instantly (not so much that it would mean death) but that was frightening and the only thing I thought about was death. And IDK if my survival mechanism kicked in or what but I just wanted to stay alive. And as I was in fear I thought about why am I in fear, what is being feared. That totally interrupted my trip...

@sunny33 Ahh the ego awakening. Good job, that devil is very slippery to catch.

@Schahin Have you awaken to what is infinite intelligence? Have you seen that material is mind? If not, you won't understand why you are creating everything. Stop thinking that YOU are creating it with YOUR own mind. It's not how it works. God is creating everything with his infinite intelligence. Go see the video of "Infinite intelligence" to make some things clear. This is a very deep deep awakening that not a lot of people have awoken to. I see a lot of people are misunderstanding this.

So I've been looking at Ozen Rajneesh lately just to see whats going on and I've came across this video. Whats going on here? Is he channeling something to them? Are they on some substances? It looks like people are opening them selves to an experience. If someone understands whats going on please I would like you to elaborate more. Thanks

@remember So this is one of those deeper meditation dances?

@Bill W lol I'm not literally speaking that there is a red devil with horns and evil beard

@kira Don't over-complicate this. Just put it in a mini plastic seal bag (the one that is used to keep weed in) and just put in the freezer.

This is a good one!

If it's already on paper just put it in the freezer. Works for me.

@Adilbek You are a "It" no gender, no form, but everything at the same time at once. When Leo is saying that he is God he doesn't mean it from an Ego's perspective, he is speaking from the absolute sense, because there is nothing else but God. Total non-duality, total singularity. Once you have a mystical experience you wake up from the illusion that you are a human being, separate from God, and then you realize that you are One with it, later you understand that you are literally God. This work takes time, don't think it's one awakening and your done. In my personal experience I've gone through several awakenings and you understand more with each awakening. You understand it more clearly, you can wrap your mind around it.

Such arrogance

By the way our normal consciousness level is yet too low to awaken fully, it's a part of evolution. Consciousness grows on it's own when you are getting older, you are way more conscious then when you were a teen, and you will be more conscious after 10 years. This is where yoga/meditation comes in, you "speed up" your normal consciousness evolution and after 10-20 years you might grow it enough to awaken fully. It's just evolution.

Doing Yoga will heal your body if you do it correctly which is beneficial on it's own but this is another topic. Growing consciousness/awareness through meditation/yoga is crucial in this work. Once you have a nice base then trying psychedelics will just sky-rocket your built consciousness through the roof, you might not even handle such consciousness, tripping you might "feel" some things, but you can't understand what it is. It takes time. In my experience when I do a lot of yoga and smoke weed at the weekend my consciousness just blows me out so much that I just can't handle so much awareness, also I'am using a vaporizer to smoke it, it makes more of a mental high than a body compared to a bong hit. Also I smoke max 0.4g, that's enough for me cause when you are stoned af you just can't contemplate normally. Also I've worked with it for a long time now, not many people can awaken through weed. It's a tool and you must learn how to use it to your advantage, not just surrender to laziness and entertainment like Youtube videos, music, movies and food cause that will be a temptation towards those things. Here this pic might help you to understand more about how consciousness works. (it's just a model, but you might benefit from it)

@ttm That's how reality works. Some "rant", some "defend".

@Justine You will out of this home-retreat. Maybe not as much as leaving your home living near a forest (electronics/radio waves/wifi signals tires the body.) But still do it!

We are probably both projecting stuff. Understand that it's very very hard to communicate through some forum using written words. To completely understand a persons view you have to have a linguistic conversation face to face because a lot is said by HOW you said something. You must hear the intonation and the emotion behind the words spoken to fully understand. I don't mean anything in an angry way, you probably read and thought that, that's OK from my POV cause I understand this problem. Which is also not spoken by other people and I myself see tons of confusion here on the forum and else where like emails, chats, public comment sections such as youtube etc. Im not here to defend.

I can't take people seriously when they speak such things.

You see how you yourself are dependent on Leo? If he does something that no other man is trying to do (go that deep to the extreme) you start to doubt spiritual work. Tons of people left Leo when he started spiritual work and moved pass Stage Orange (basic self-help material). Tons of people left Leo when he started to say that he was God. Tons of people will doubt and leave Leo after this retreat. If you doubt him then leave and let it be, don't just rant about it here on the forum. You are probably just angry that he goes deeper/faster and doesn't resonate with you anymore.

@ElenaO Reiki kinda helps a person to get grounded, especially when the person is in a lot of anxiety and worry. It helps to relax a person, also reiki energy heals. I got a first initiation a while back, but I'm so lazy to give myself reiki everyday. But once I do it I feel it immediately, calmness/love flows through my body.

@moon777light You feel it because the meditation itself grew your awareness and thus making you more self-aware of your emotions. That's why you are feeling it, your awareness is like a knife which now became more sharper. Also your ego is resisting it, that's why you feel bad emotions so you quit and degrade to your base level for a little while until you still find the strength to meditate and restart all over. These on's and off's are quite frequent for myself. I do yoga and just can't stand it for weeks until I go back to my earlier stage. That's the magnetic pull of the ego identity. My tip would be just do it no matter what comes up. You will break through it eventually if you have accumulated enough inner strength and will power.