Rigel

I won’t take your word for it to avoid weakening my intent but I’ll be open about it & admit you were right if that’s the case.

That’s exactly what I am going for. I feel like I am about to go to war. I am prepping for & anticipating war. Catharsis is the right word I think. definition: “the process of releasing, and thereby providing relief from, strong or repressed emotions.” Purging is a good one too. Thanks for hyping me. I’ve told too many people to back off now lol. Time to put my money where my mouth is.

I decided to trip on day 4 from 10am onwards. I’ll do a moderate dose of mushrooms. I am expecting it to feel way different & deeper after 3 full days of emotional work/meditation.

Yeah I think seeing the sun everyday would do me some good. I was planning on going for a light run as part of my 1hour exercise routine.

Yes I did.

Those are all great ideas thank you 🙏

@The Crocodile Thanks for the inspiration but I don’t want to fill up my apartment with candle fumes.

I eat home made kimchi every day & I have noticed a significant improvement in my digestion. Nice, non-sticky logs that come out in one piece without struggles. No gas, no bowel discomfort. I used to get gases when eating chick peas. Now I don’t. And I just love the flavour of kimchi. I make it super spicy. Goes especially well with carbs like sweet potatoes, rice, whole grain bread & legumes. Meat as well. Tangy, hot & spicy health boost!

Thank you for your input Davino. Reading your comment makes me want to boil down & distill my intent to its most simple formulation & make it a sort of mantra. Something I can repeat over & over when I find myself loosing focus. Maybe write it down on a piece of paper & stick it to the wall where I’ll be doing the work.

I didn’t think of it but it makes a lot of sense. I fully expect my mind to try every trick in the book to derail my efforts during the week. If I can remove all guess work before going into it & know exactly what I should be doing at any moment, it should make it easier to stick to it & not take my mind’s bullshit at face value. Thank you for your perspective. I’ll contemplate whether I should trip or not during the retreat this week & put it (or not) in the schedule in black & white.

Your advice is basically what the book says lol Practice. No book is ever going to fill in all the gaps but it’s a good read.

Yes sensei. Real movement ability doesn’t come risk free😅 Although I like the idea of using Bulgarian bags or ropes to do those movements even more. Ropes is best imo. @Something Funny check out RMT club if you want to take @Michael569’s advice to heart & you are dead set on using a mace type tool.

That is an excuse & a story. You don’t need to feel better to start moving. Get on the ground & roll around if anything else feels overwhelming. Once you start moving you increase your ability to move more. You don’t by waiting to feel better. By crawling you set yourself up for walking. By walking you set yourself up for running. By sitting & waiting to feel better you set yourself up for sitting more & feeling worst.

I don’t have experience the mace but I do a practice with heavy ropes that involves a lot of similar movements & I can say it has been SHOCKING. If you want to move well you need some kind of practice that works on rotation & coiling of the spine, supination & pronation of your joints. The problem with traditional lifts you are doing is they teach you how NOT to move by bracing your spine in a neutral position. Don’t get me wrong, pull ups, pushups & such are great for building strength but they are inadequate to train you how to actually move like a human can & should in everyday life. I was socked to discover that most people don’t even know how to walk properly because they either don’t move at all & sit all day or (even more socking) only lift & squeeze their muscles & call that training. Most people can’t walk in balance because their spine won’t move. I think the mace can correct that from what I have seen. @Michael569 Sorry but you are very wrong on this one. I would choose to do mace work or other practices that involve coiling of the spine before all the other practices listed. Balance & movement ability >>> hypertrophy hypertrophy is great if it’s built on a fluid & balanced foundation.

I don’t remember the brand I am using. It’s been a few years already. But you’d probably have to cater to the company your audiologist is working with. I had my ear doctor make the molds & they sent it to a company that took those & made the ear plugs. I wish I remembered, sorry.

Have some some custom molded made. They are a bit pricey but they are a million times better than anything off the shelf. One of the best investments I ever made as a musician. You also get to change the noise reduction level whenever you want by changing the filter in them. Very easy to do. -15db, -20db, -30db. Whatever you want & all with a neutral/flat eq curve.

Never done 5-Meo but I don’t get visuals at all on other psychs.

I don’t think I understood #5

With your mind. You set a rule for yourself that you’ll only use the search bar. Takes some discipline & willpower. Maybe there’s an extension out there I don’t know.

Anything that is fed trough algorithm is appealing to the lowest part of your psyche. Only allow search bar queries. That goes for YouTube as well. There’s great stuff out there but they ain’t recommending it to you.

The fermentation process transforms a lot of the already small amount of sugar into stuff that is pretty good for you. There are also many different qualities of kimchi. A lot of them don’t put malt syrup in it. You could also make it, it’s pretty simple & the sugars from the cabbage & radish is enough to kick start the fermentation.

Oh you are still tormenting yourself. How is it going?

You are inventing all of that as well. Your interpretation of what is going on with Leo’s teaching is just that, an interpretation. You are creating hell for yourself as you are projecting all of that. A solution you ask? For what? Why would reality have to change in any way? The irony is it’s the devil that wants to get rid of the devil. Leo crossed a line you arbitrarily created out of nothing & which you use to morally flagellate yourself.

Notice that you are the one bringing this suicide talk to actualized.org right now. Not the other way around. You are inventing this black & white moral interpretation that either the devilry, slavery & suffering ends or you kills yourself. Why?

It’s a neat feature when your commonplace book becomes huge. I can’t remember where I put everything. You don’t need per say if you don’t want it then go wild. I think it’s especially useful if you keep journals where you brain dump & brain storm in unstructured ways. Sometimes an insight will come up related to a topic that I have a structured note about for instance addiction. I can then go to that structured note & link that journal entry for future reference. I definitely won’t remember which of my hundreds of journal entries I wrote that down in. You could just copy the insight down in the structured note but I like to have the context of where that insight came from years after the fact when this specific struggle comes up again & a lot of that context doesn’t belong in the structured note. That’s just one exemple. I find many useful ways to use interlinks.