now is forever

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Posts posted by now is forever

  2. Posted

    3 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

     

    @now is forever Jesus told him, "Anyone who puts a hand to the plow and then looks back is not fit for the Kingdom of God."

    I'm not giving up. I've never been able to give up on what I love. I have to learn to balance and integrate it with my real life. I will and I am. 

    I don't have to support myself, I already paid off my house and I can be a housewife if I want. It would be easy just to give up and be the well balanced highly effective yet isolated person I was before. This is going to hurt like hell, but it's also what I really really want. It's what God wants and I owe him something still.

    When my mission is done and my purpose is fulfilled I can leave. 

     

    on what kind of mission are you? i thought i could run beforehand.

  7. Posted

    33 minutes ago, mandyjw said:

    @now is forever You're one of the only ones who mutually understands how to converse nondualy and now you're lraving. This happened too quick and I keep feeling crazy. Everyone I interact with is my higher self or a shadow mirror or both. Please don't leave. We all need to learn to reconcile the dualities of in person connection and real life and our online connections. It's too late to choose one or the other. 

    my online life is heavily interfering with my real life. there is also a bunch of work coming into my direction. and i can’t go on like this. it’s not healthy anymore. not for me and not for the people in my sourounding. it’s hard for me, too, but it’s overdue. these eruptions like with joseph have to happen - we all start to fall asleep here at some point if we don’t leave at the right time. don’t miss that point mandy! we all start to get eaten by the nothing after some time. depending on what we came with or came for. 

  9. Posted · Edited by now is forever

    19 minutes ago, tsuki said:

    I'm still missing @Zweistein.

    She posted here a few days ago. I hoped she would drop by and say hi.

    thought you where joking. also what she wrote seems like a prophecy - it was maybe the one grain of sand that brought out the sphinx. xD we were both so much into the neverending story.

    she even posted a bunny. although i can’t remember what the bunnies where about... ah it was about the monty python ?? fear bunny.

    i actually wonder if they ever heard the story of the seven swabians.

  11. Posted

    the manual cleaning takes to long. and i got headaches. i realize how the ego slowly softens it out again. i could keep it... i could still sometimes... no. no. NO

    i really must go, i don’t like some developments here. i also understand why joseph had to do what he did! i also want to leave. he somehow inspires me, the deeper the bonding the more radical you must be with how you leave. emotions involved. people hurt. don’t want you to leave because we cling together like cow on ice.

    i loved how zweistein left, she was so virtuous in ice skating she didn’t get stuck.

    i=you=we

     

  12. Posted · Edited by now is forever

    @Leo Gura can you please erase all content i ever posted. i tried to do it manually but i get headaches and i realize it’s better if you would do it. do i need to give up my account then, too? it’s a little bit scary.

    i just post it here because mandy will understand. it’s not about the topic.

    you know that @mandyjw don’t you - it’s not about worth! a person does not have a price. if you struggle with giving all the love you could give at the moment it might be because you are struggling with some other values right now. same goes for feeling unworthy.

  13. Posted

    24 minutes ago, Shin said:

    I'm sorry but you've missed your chance woman !

    I'm only interested in Natashas butt now B|

    hehe you mean the dog hole ? natasha mentioned? i don’t mind shin who’s butt you fancy you’d probably not fancy my melons, i’m not asian. it doesn’t matter i still wanted to tell you that. thank you!

  15. Posted · Edited by now is forever

    On 16.5.2018 at 7:57 AM, now is forever said:

    it's about wanting something so much they will burn themselves.

    the question i posted was:

    why do moths burn themselves flying towards the light?

    there is this german song:

    in the free fall through space and time. towards infinity. moths fly towards the light, the same as you and me.

    somewhere somewhen, somehow the future starts. i will not wait for long. love is made of courage. don’t think for long. we move on fire wheels towards the future through the night.

     

     

     

     

  16. Posted · Edited by now is forever

    8 minutes ago, DrewNows said:

    i constantly misunderstand/misinterpret  you in what you share with me. Do whatever you see fit for your own expansion ?

    Btw I don’t appreciate your judgement against projection and seemingly against survival 

    carry on with the processing of yourself, this seems strange ‘as if’ you might actually forget that which is you,

    anyways it can certainly be as if I were never here, never even existed

    “maybe you’re perfect now and you don’t wanna ruin that” 

    “I think that’s a super philosophy; that way you can go through your your entire life without really having to know anybody” 

    love these quotes from good will hunting 

    Have a great day or night 

    i appreciate your attempt. but you got me involved with you very late to my story here, and it’s not against you. i already forgot myself - i forgot myself here. even though i started to forget myself much earlier on. i probably started to forget myself the moment of my birth. i can know a person only when i spend time with them. and to spend time here i left other people alone. you see the problem. of course you will never know anybody in your life! you can only be there for them and understand them, or you won’t. 

    it’s contraction/retreat not expansion.

  18. Posted

    On 23.5.2018 at 0:06 PM, now is forever said:

    yeah but there is no absence of thing. thing is made up of energy. and energy has rules.

    be happy, you are a verry high organized being in an itself creating environment out of pure not nothingness, you are a mystery.

    if you accept that, you can find out about every layer in between, everything has information to it you don't have to believe in just one point of view, you can create your own reality with it. but ultimatively you need a body for that, i love to create with my body heart and mind, my hands are the highest good i have, though.

     

    On 23.5.2018 at 1:29 PM, now is forever said:

    my favourite artist: robert montgomery:

     

    IMG_4140.JPG

    maybe i forgot to mention the soul. without the soul the heart is junk food for the ego.

  19. Posted

    5 minutes ago, DrewNows said:

    No escaping YOU, so what are you doing here...

    i am journaling and you take part in it as you wish to. i don’t limit you. you project on me and i tell you where i don’t agree. you can stop taking part in it any minute. can you? obviously not! 

    so what am i doing here. i process something - is this ok with you? do i need to ask you for permission? i’ll delete it afterwards - i’d do it somewhere else, but the problem is in this space connected to this space, my traces in this space. i told you i’m wrapping up loose ends.

  20. Posted · Edited by now is forever

    4 minutes ago, DrewNows said:

    The dream is part of itself, part of your story including humanity. You won’t be able to escape/run away or end it 

    bring love and acceptance to the demons you see “out there” in this world, THIS IS consciousness work  

    who says, this is not? it is impossible. if it won’t work here, where will it work? it has always been impossible. i just didn’t mind before.

  21. Posted

    1 minute ago, jbram2002 said:

    You say we don't understand, don't know you, that we're wrong. Help us understand. Why exactly are you leaving?  

    You say you don't like the egos on the forum. Yes, there's a lot of ego. We all have ego. You included. If you didn't have a massive ego, you wouldn't be going through every post, rereading your own wisdom, and resharing it. You wouldn't delete your posts if you had no ego. You maybe think you're deleting your ego with it, but you're simply growing it.

    You have several people here who are genuinely concerned about you. Some of what you're saying sounds like depression. Some of it sounds like the same walls many others have hit on their path to enlightenment. You are pushing hard against anyone who challenges your view. Why?

    It's ok to want to leave. People grow and move on. But what you're doing here looks like a cry for help. The people who love you are standing up and asking how they can help. Open up to us. Even if you have to do so in PMs. But more importantly, open up to yourself. 

    so first of all of course i have an ego, but i only share these past thoughts with myself - who do i talk to? to no one i just let the thoughts run. it’s like talking to myself. sorry you get concerned! i just try to creatively actively figure out myself - it’s a deconstruction process. i’m sorry you got involved. i’m sorry i made you integrate me as a friend. i’m probably not. i have not been from the beginning. we all just use each other to mirror ourselves as soon as the ego can it strikes. i’m not particularly talking about you. i just got tired of it. i thought the last video would bring people to reflect it actually did that to me. i thought about what needs to survive in me and the i saw what survives in others and it made me so sad and angry and empty. i don’t know whom i’m doing this for as i never did this just for myself - i didn’t even want to be here in the beginning.

    it’s the outcome if people play with spirituality. there was a chaos storm going on here when i arrived now i am that. this is rage and the will to destroy.

  22. Posted

    On 23.5.2018 at 9:04 AM, now is forever said:

    if a mirror mirrors itself, it just mirrors itself. if it had awareness it would be aware of mirroring itself and its nature as a mirror.

    awareness in a human is looking into the mirror and realizing, that is me.

    awareness in a person reflecting about itself is: oh that's me!

    resulting in oh maybe i remove my self - then i can see clearly!

    what a joke

     

    On 23.5.2018 at 11:17 AM, Highest said:

    I see where you try to point to by saying ''awareness'' but awareness is another relative concept conceived in the mind my friend. The only thing which exists is that which exists. Now you can call it whatever. Awareness is a good name but ultimately this has no name, it's beyond language. It can only truly be known internally.

     

    On 23.5.2018 at 11:21 AM, now is forever said:

    keeping the thought's running huh ?

    but it is not the self that you have to remove it's the awareness!

    i really love the answer from The Ultimate Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: it's 42

    life only happens if you try not being aware of it happening. because as long as you try that you are not aware about it happening. awareness is awareness on the moment.

  24. Posted · Edited by now is forever

    space is there to be filled. the question is with what we can fill space with ego or we can fill space with space.

    On 29.5.2018 at 11:45 PM, now is forever said:

    so sorry - was fixed on my own problems...

    is it better now?

    i'll try to explain my model of it: of course there is a future and a past, but they are not real (they are only in your mind) in my reality there is no time, just space. in this space is movement, everything that moves has it's own time. so you are living on the earth and are linked to the earth time. but not exactly because the earth will take space much longer than you will be taking space on it. so earth time is longer. your awareness of time is fragmented in movement, of spaced fragments. for example your eyelid movement, the ability of your muscle and skeleton movement. it is also fragmented in the rotation of the sun and moon around the earth. that in short.

    so what is now? now is the space you are in now and now and now and now.

    so it is you processing through that space.

    that's really not something i would want to stay in forever...so let's ad emotions.

    for a human being it means you have the power to change your own outcome you just have to be intensely in that moment. and you can't change all of it at once, you have to work on every part you are unhappy with, with a lot of care and effort. still need to ad things to your system though - and for me interaction with the outside is mandatory.

    if you are always thinking of past nows or future nows. you forget to listen to what you need now. and that might be what you really need. so i said, give yourself more space!

    because space is everything, processing, creating time.

    yourself is your me your i your body your self.

    and it's always about: with what will you fill your space. (yourself and the space you are processing through, interacting with)

    i don’t think it’s good to try to provide a spiritual forum to an ego game - it will never change. its just another soul on sale. its impossible to teach colours to the blind. my mistake.