MarkKol

Help with a life decision

6 posts in this topic

In a video I don't remember the name of, Leo said (and I'm paraphrasing) "Sitting alone quietly for a week/two weeks, this will grow you". 

Personal story / why I asked 

I have been living next to a very obnoxious hair salon all my life, in a small village. Now I am finally an adult with a job, my grandparents moved to a different country and they left an empty house only a few kilometers away. I am thinking of potentially moving there since I got their approval (they're not coming back). However, this house is really isolated from most of society. So I feel like moving there would improve my focus and creativity, but it would also bring my social interaction from 3/10 to 0/10 aside from my office job. The social and dating opportunities in my part of the country are astonishingly bad, I really feel like more focus & creativity would help me build up better skills and finally move to a more prosperous place. This will cost me quite a bit though. Worth it, or not?

Overall, I'm quite resistant to loneliness when I built up some momentum. As silly as it sounds, I'm concerned that having 0 social interaction everyday will impair my already bad social skills even more. This house is so insolated I'm pretty much guaranteed to have multiple days where I don't see a single human being.

I'm 19 years old as context. Living in a third world country with a extremely tiny population.

Third option! - Move to a prosperous country right away, I have around 4000 euros/dollars saved up. The difficult part would be finding a job in a foreign country.

a) suck it up, move to that isolated house and built up skills

b) move right away

c) stay at my current home and try to build up skills/study while not completely destroying my (already bad) social life

Edited by MarkKol

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Here's a twist though, my current house is connected with the hair salon and If I want to go to my kitchen or bathroom or living room, I have to pass through the salon first. You could say that my very own house is a hair salon. It's a living hell for someone like me who likes to think out loud.

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Just stay where you are unless you have to pay rent.

Do you know how much logistic and admin work is needed when moving house?

Edited by hyruga

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Wow! what an interesting and unique perspective. I'm from a busy first world country and have always dreamed of living in an isolated house. It's actually one of my life goals I'm working towards with my girlfriend.

I'm 34, have always loved solitude, and nature. You are 19, and sounds like you prefer socializing, cities, and all the things that come with society.

It's not an easy choice, you could try living alone for the spiritual experience (like Waldens Pond). This is an opportunity most people would love to have. I don't get how you would be lonely if you have an office job? And how far is the house from society? 

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15 minutes ago, itsadistraction said:

Wow! what an interesting and unique perspective. I'm from a busy first world country and have always dreamed of living in an isolated house. It's actually one of my life goals I'm working towards with my girlfriend.

I'm 34, have always loved solitude, and nature. You are 19, and sounds like you prefer socializing, cities, and all the things that come with society.

It's not an easy choice, you could try living alone for the spiritual experience (like Waldens Pond). This is an opportunity most people would love to have. I don't get how you would be lonely if you have an office job? And how far is the house from society? 

An office job is my current situation. I’m not lonely per se, at least I don’t suffer from it as much. I always handled loneliness much better than most people, most likely because I can entertain my self with ideas and have a dialogue with myself similar to a normal conversation. However I prefer having a balance of alone and social time, which I’m not having and haven’t in a long time.

The house is next to the village which already has plenty of nature, lots of forests and shiz. And yes, I quite enjoy big cities and busy streets. 

I will probably stay at my current location & job, build up skills and expand my knowledge of marketing and business. I will make it work. I feel better now.

My situation is so unique to the point where I’m struggling to explain it simply.
 

 

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Think bigger picture.

What do you want your life to look like 5 years from now, assuming you did everything in your power to get there?

Whatever the answer to that question is, that's the answer to this moving question. 

If it were me, I'd move to a big city. You don't yet realize how much personal growth you're missing out on living in the tiny village you grew up in.


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