I'm lost, help please

[Ulax]

@Gabith Also I'm reading a boook called Never Split the difference by Chris Voss atm.

I understand it to be about negotiating under high pressure. I think it could also be of value to you in your current situation as well.

[Bazooka Jesus]

7 hours ago, Gabith said:

I recently started training to become a masseur. Training that lasts 1 year, 3x a week.

That sounds amazing. I would like to do something like this too but have no idea how to finance it... how do you manage the whole thing, if I may ask?

(Bit off topic, ik, but I am just too curious to not ask)

[Gabith]

6 minutes ago, Bazooka Jesus said:

That sounds amazing. I would like to do something like this too but have no idea how to finance it... how do you manage the whole thing, if I may ask?

(Bit off topic, ik, but I am just too curious to not ask)

I live in Belgium and the price is 350€ (+- 300$) 

I'm a bit disappointed because there's too much useless theory (sometimes useful but rarely) and not much practice.
I will practice on a friend to get better 

[Jannes]

Love isn’t about being nice and soft all the time. Of course it’s also that but it’s also about being hard when you have to be. If you love yourself you would want to protect yourself and even if you love these other people you would want to be hard to them because otherwise they learn that they can get away with manipulative shit and wont grow. That’s hard to except as a soft person. It certainly is for me. 
 

Edit: If this is a recurring struggle for you you might want to go to the gym and build some muscle. You don’t have to become huge, just being better build then your normie is an easy way to gain some respect and it’s also healthy.

Edited October 21, 2022 by Jannes

[Ulax]

@Gabith Hey again dude, had the idea that maybe learning the letting go technique could be of value to you. My thoughts are that you could apply it whilst you grayrock. I personally find when I try to grayrock I can find it quite taxing emotionally, and I think using the letting go technique could help you deal with the emotions that come up, and actually come into a more relaxed place. Plus I think they'll actually bother you less if you do the technique.

[Gabith]

@Ulax Hey, great idea! 

I used the letting go technique for almost 2 weeks everyday and soon after, I forgot about it... 

 

[Ulax]

@Gabith Haha I think I do the same thing quite frequently with various techniques!

I'd be curious to hear how things pan out for you dude with your current situation btw. So, feel free to update me on how the situation develops with regards to these folks. I get it might be tough at times to deal with.

[Gabith]

Thank you I will.

Sometimes I am able to see this situation as a gift instead of a curse. It's uncomfortable but it's a kind of situation that will help me to grow and I really need to set boundaries with toxic people. It's hard to keep this positive view on it but I'll do my best to learn without too much resistance and worrying 

[Ulax]

Just now, Gabith said:

Thank you I will.

Sometimes I am able to see this situation as a gift instead of a curse. It's uncomfortable but it's a kind of situation that will help me to grow and I really need to set boundaries with toxic people. It's hard to keep this positive view on it but I'll do my best to learn without too much resistance and worrying 

@Gabith I think I understand dude. Sounds like you are feeling some fear and also some courage.

I like your mindset.

[Gabith]

Thank you for your support 

[Ulax]

@Gabith ?

[Gabith]

@Ulax update, I sent an email to the center to explain the problem and they agreed to put me in the other classroom, I feel relieved

This helped me to realize how much I was naive & too much open to people I don't even know 
I will work on setting my boundaries & letting go 

[Ulax]

@Gabith Hey again dude, pleased to hear from you.

Sounds to me like you had a situation you were uncomfortable about, came up with a solution and were assertive about implementing that solution. Respect!

Also, looks to me like you've noticed some areas you want to grow in. I wish you well in those efforts.

Edited October 24, 2022 by Ulax

[StarStruck]

Respect has nothing to do with love. Being all love dovey doesn’t mean people will respect you.

You are giving love away without them deserving it so it is in human nature to not value something they haven’t deserved. 

You get respect from others if you respect yourself. Be more focused on yourself. You attract what you are. Keep that in mind.