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Guardian

there is no need to over-highlight attraction as a women

11 posts in this topic

it is totally fine not to make-up or act sweet and innocent as a women when it doesn't feel true.

you could view external non-confirmation of your non-conformance to usual images as filtering out the distractors and aligning yourself further with your true self.

by not conforming for the sake of conforming or for a superficial image, you are allowing more men to learn and recognize natural beauty and will be able to recognize/encounter those people easier that form value based relationships.

for a deeper personality matching can occure when less false blinders stand in the way.

for people that see what more you are better want to see that you do not mask what more you are or can be.

Edited by Guardian

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Of course there's no need for makeup and all this shit.

The sad true is that we are women pushed to this shallow corner since we are innocent girls.

Men are never satisfied with us.

When we care about our beauty men say us not to care about our beauty. when we don't care about our beauty you judge us (harshly) for not caring about it.

Then decide, what do you fucking want?

We get contradictory messages from society, be that, no wait, be that, no, you should be that, etc.

 

Maybe instead of judging women for caring about their appearance lets judge the system that brought women to be that way.

 

It's very easy as a man to say:"Leave the beauty, you don't need this" when actually in reality we judged mostly 70%-100% by your beauty, appearance.

 

 

 

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there was no mention of it being easy

but the pain is felt

people that judge by the usual attraction factors are still children, mostly

but if one is still attracted to another displaying such characteristics  ( besides the dislike for intuiting that they might not like one for how one wants oneself to be ) one should not be hindered from still "approaching", if emotionally there exists still some form of attraction ( even though intellectually the limits a painfully apparent )

do engage and when there will be judgment and denial for not being a typical expectation express intention and leave

this will send them on a path on which they will be confronted with the limitations of such perceptions

one has to allow oneself to be hurt to grow

Edited by Guardian

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Personally i have quite high standard when it comes to personality of a girl but not high at all when it comes to appearance. As long as she meets my minimum threashhold of looks i am good (which is not that hard to meet if a girl takes basic care of herself). Therefore i am willing to give a lot of girls a chance on a first date in case her personality ends up being really nice. 

Such guys are not as rare as you think, just try to find and date such people that give chances to average looking girls.

There is a catch though, such guys often are not the most succesful guys with girls that get all the hot girls, but they will treat you well, love you and most importantly give you a chance to show who you are.

Most guys are not like this, this is a relatively feminine way of dating and most guys are quite visual. However they do exist, just try to find them.

 

Edited by Karmadhi

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1 hour ago, Random witch said:

When we care about our beauty men say us not to care about our beauty. when we don't care about our beauty you judge us (harshly) for not caring about it.

Then decide, what do you fucking want?

We get contradictory messages from society, be that, no wait, be that, no, you should be that, etc.

Yea but that also goes for men.

Many women for example say they want a sensitive guy or whatever, but they actually want a bad boy.

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1 minute ago, PurpleTree said:

Yea but that also goes for men.

Many women for example say they want a sensitive guy or whatever, but they actually want a bad boy.

Women attraction for bad boys came from reprssion of "bad" characteristics within herself.

Once woman discover her inner power, inner wild sexuality, she began to see bad boys the way they really are.

Women tend love empathetic men with high EQ.

 

 

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8 minutes ago, Random witch said:

Women attraction for bad boys came from reprssion of "bad" characteristics within herself.

Once woman discover her inner power, inner wild sexuality, she began to see bad boys the way they really are.

Women tend love empathetic men with high EQ.

 

 

Yeah, you are kind of right, women really like empathetic men with high EQ, but still, a lot of the "  masculine"  traits in bad boys are attractive, which makes women feel comfortable and safe. Even though they are unaware of it or don't like to admit it.

The ideal men for most healthy feminine essence women are men who can provide the sense of safeness, at the same that he has sensibility enough to feel his women moods and necessities.

Edited by Tudo

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41 minutes ago, Tudo said:

Yeah, you are kind of right, women really like empathetic men with high EQ, but still, a lot of the "  masculine"  traits in bad boys are attractive, which makes women feel comfortable and safe. Even though they are unaware of it or don't like to admit it.

The ideal men for most healthy feminine essence women are men who can provide the sense of safeness, at the same that he has sensibility enough to feel his women moods and necessities.

Not all the "bad boys" are comfortable and safe, some of them just wild, exiting and kind of adventurous. I think this is what attracts more.

Quote

The ideal men for most healthy feminine essence women are men who can provide the sense of safeness, at the same that he has sensibility enough to feel his women moods and necessities.

I think it's more complicated, I don't thing that there could be someone who is ideal for someone else.

 

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1 minute ago, Random witch said:

Not all the "bad boys" are comfortable and safe, some of them just wild, exiting and kind of adventurous. I think this is what attracts more.

 

Yeah. But what I meant is that usually there is the sense that the " bad boy" is a strong guy that could provide a greater sense of" containment" if he wanted to.

2 minutes ago, Random witch said:

 

I think it's more complicated, I don't thing that there could be someone who is ideal for someone else.

 

Attraction is complicated, but there are some clear behavioral patterns. If you had experience approaching girls in clubs and trying to attract women in general you would know what I'm talking about.

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31 minutes ago, Tudo said:

Yeah. But what I meant is that usually there is the sense that the " bad boy" is a strong guy that could provide a greater sense of" containment" if he wanted to.

Attraction is complicated, but there are some clear behavioral patterns. If you had experience approaching girls in clubs and trying to attract women in general you would know what I'm talking about.

I don't know there's many kinds of men and many versions of "bad boys".

The attempt to put things in boxes and generalizing stuff is very pointless.

The pattern of attracting mostly stage orange women in clubs isn't the same pattern of attracting turquoise women in some retreat, so those patterns are very relative and their successes depends on certain criteria, certain time, certain place and certain level of consciousness and ego development of the people involved in those.

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23 hours ago, Random witch said:

 

The attempt to put things in boxes and generalizing stuff is very pointless.

 

Nah, there are very behavioral patterns. My experience and the work of evolutionary scientists show pretty clear patterns about sexuality. It doesn't mean everybody behaves in a determined way, it just shows that most people statistically have the tendency to.

23 hours ago, Random witch said:

I don't know there's many kinds of men and many versions of "bad boys".

 

But I'm not talking about being a " bad boy". I'm talking about being a good man with some important " bad boy" traits for survival.

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