Something casual

[Gesundheit2]

Introversion is an ideology for the introverted, "extroversion" is just part of the ideology. These categories only existed lately, nobody was this or that before, because the natural state is preference-less. Introverted people hate themselves at the core, so part of that hatred gets projected outwards through this lens/ideology and other means.

As well, introversion is a covert form of narcissism, and for extroversion it's overt. In both cases, you want to be the star of the show and the center of attention. Only you fail in achieving that when you lack the required traits/skills that make you an extrovert.

The natural state is neutral and undefined. It can be this way or that way, it doesn't matter, and you won't mind. You're just a human, not the star of the show, and certainly not the center of the universe, maybe except to yourself. In which case, you'll rightfully suffer the consequences of loneliness and egotism.

I could spend my time with people or alone. I enjoy my time either way. I feel socially liberated, free from self-criticism/hatred and detached from what people think. It's the best way to be.

Edited March 1, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

There's nothing in this world that disgusts me more than hippies and everything related to them.

[Gesundheit2]

Hippies are the only proof that exists that men are not better than women. I guess there's one good thing about hippies after all.

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

A view from the hospital where I get my training.

Nothing spectacular, just my reality.

[Gesundheit2]

Stress creates unclarity. Enlightenment is the transcendence of that into clarity. There's no enlightenment without stress.

[Gesundheit2]

Everything in my life is shit, except my health. And still, health trumps everything else. I am grateful.

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

My PC got infected with the VYIA blackmail virus, which encrypts files and refers to a link that can decrypt them for about $500. A number of files were lost, but luckily they're not very numerous nor important.

I don't use any Anti-Virus software, and I have my reasons for that. They slow my PC down (it's old and low-end to begin with), they interrupt a lot of usual stuff with their false positives, and if you don't keep up with the latest updates they won't catch the virus, so it would be a false negative, and they need activation code and registration which can give me a headache. Besides, I often tend to be careful with the files I let into my PC, so no software is really needed to begin with. I even have the built-in Windows Defender disabled for these reasons. However, this time I downloaded the file, and it seemed suspicious but I curiously let it slide anyway, and I regretted it. Not much was lost, but I had to go through some trouble trying to fix this thing. Besides being logged out of all major sites because of "suspicious behavior" (basically they took my password and searched my social media for money, which I don't have, so jokes on them haha).

On the other hand, I appreciate what happened because it's the first time I encounter this virus. I heard about it a lot, but never got it before. I heard devastating stories of completely lost hard drives.

However, it wasn't pure luck that I caught on to the virus very early; I always keep the Task Manager running in the background, so that I can monitor all software activities and how much resources they are taking. I saw a bunch of weird files eating up the CPU, RAM, and disk. So I immediately turned off the internet and started killing off the malignant processes one after another, and then going to their root files and deleting them. I think having an HDD instead of a SSD is a good thing and it helped in this case, because SSDs are a lot faster, so the virus would have spread like fire in that case. I also have another Windows installed on a different partition (Windows 7 ), I made it exactly for occasions like this (and others) as a backup system so that I can debug freely from there.

Anyway, hard luck for me for the lost files. I searched for recovery methods and tried some, but nothing seems to work. The most important thing is that none of my porn was affected, and that's all that matters haha.

Edited March 9, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

There are some things life that you're just born with and can't do much about. I think it's most things, actually. For example, I was born with a low IQ and EQ. I've developed myself so much over the past 5 years, but I'm still somewhere near average in both. And that took a lot of mental work, which hindered my life in other areas such as career. It just sucks that things are the way they are. I really wish that someday I would be able to speak my thoughts clearly and communicate my understanding of the world fluently like it occurs in my head, but that just doesn't seem possible, at least without huge efforts and environmental developments.

I'm starting to get the idea that at least 90% of one's life is determined by genetics and environment. The personal component to development seems pretty much insignificant in comparison.

[Gesundheit2]

Delusion

"A delusion is a false fixed belief that is not amenable to change in light of conflicting evidence. As a pathology, it is distinct from a belief based on false or incomplete information, confabulation, dogma, illusion, hallucination, or some other misleading effects of perception, as individuals with those beliefs are able to change or readjust their beliefs upon reviewing the evidence."

[Gesundheit2]

I am beginning to see the nuances of social interactions. There's not one right way to act in all cases, it's more complex than that. The most important things are the ability to tap into the other person's perception of you, assessing your value in their eyes, understanding the circumstances, understanding the story that brought you together (history), body language, then finally verbal language which is the least important of all.

Interesting.

[Gesundheit2]

 

[Gesundheit2]

What other people think doesn't really matter, neither does what they say. It's what they do that actually matters.

But...

What they think influence what they say, and vice-versa. And that in turn influences what they do.

So, that's why what people think/say might matter. It's always the case, but it can be very twisted sometimes.

[zurew]

On 2022. 03. 09. at 6:19 PM, Gesundheit2 said:

I don't use any Anti-Virus software, and I have my reasons for that. They slow my PC down (it's old and low-end to begin with), they interrupt a lot of usual stuff with their false positives, and if you don't keep up with the latest updates they won't catch the virus, so it would be a false negative, and they need activation code and registration which can give me a headache. Besides, I often tend to be careful with the files I let into my PC, so no software is really needed to begin with.

There are some good free antivirus softwares out there. Here is a list:https://www.safetydetectives.com/blog/best-really-free-antivirus-for-windows/.

I am using Avira right now, the free version and it is good enough for me. Of Course you could argue, that because it is free it not nearly as good as the premium version, but thats still better than not having any antivirus software. I don't know how slow you PC is, but you can switch off your antivirus if you really need more power for specifical tasks. 

You can catch a virus not just through downloading files, so i think its better to have an antivirus software (you can catch a lot, just by browsing on the internet and clicking on something you shouldn't have). Its not just that it can destroy your PC, they can steal some of your passwords and then they can blackmail you ( I think the password stealing is what is one of the worst case scenarios). You won't have a headache with the registration code process, if you use a completely free version.

But if you really don't want to use it, thats your choice. But overall i think it has more benefits compared to the negatives.

I will write one virus story down if you are interested:

There is a virus i don't specifically remember its name, but it was a virus that can change what you have in your clipboard ( when you press ctrl+c the stuff go to your clipboard,  just saying if you don't familiar with it). So this virus was undetected because it was made that way ( there are some sites, where you can check if a file has any virus in it these sites check your file with the top 10-15 virus softwares, so if you don't want to download an antivirus and you think you found something skecthy then you can check those files there).

So for what they can use the information that you have in your clipboard? They don't use that information, instead they change the information there, and put other information there. To be more specific, this virus was made for stealing money from people using a clipboard trick. So if you are familiar with crypto currencies, you know that bitcoin have a specific address structure. Everyone has their own specific address, and these crypto addresses lets be it bitcoin or ethereum they are built in a different but specfic way. These hackers made an algorithm that can detect if you have an information structure in your clipboard, which is kind of like a bitcoin address structure. So the virus changes that address to another one(for an alternative bitcoin address that the hacker has) , so when you want to pay some money to someone via bitcoin, you will send it to the wrong person. It is very smart from the hacker's perspective, because we are talking about cryptocurrency the hacker can't be traced back who he is(or with just very very great effort).

Most of the time if you want to pay someone via using cryptocurrency you ask for their address and then you copy that because it is really long it can have numbers letters and capital letters in it as well, so it would be silly to write it down by hand ,because you can easily make some mistakes. So thats why they made the virus this way. Overall this hacker's address has more than 2 million dollars on it, and because of blockchain and because it is public, you can see the transactions there. You can only see different kind of addresses that sent him x amount of dollars. So it is crazy.

Overall you have to be very careful with viruses, thats why i wrote this story down.  Have a great day!

[Gesundheit2]

2 hours ago, zurew said:

There are some good free antivirus softwares out there. Here is a list:https://www.safetydetectives.com/blog/best-really-free-antivirus-for-windows/.

Hey, thanks for the suggestions.

Quote

I don't know how slow you PC is

Intel core i3 1st Gen CPU; M 370  @ 2.40GHz.

Quote

You can catch a virus not just through downloading files, so i think its better to have an antivirus software (you can catch a lot, just by browsing on the internet and clicking on something you shouldn't have). Its not just that it can destroy your PC, they can steal some of your passwords and then they can blackmail you ( I think the password stealing is what is one of the worst case scenarios). You won't have a headache with the registration code process, if you use a completely free version.

But if you really don't want to use it, thats your choice. But overall i think it has more benefits compared to the negatives.

I'm sold. I didn't know that viruses can be transmitted merely through the browser. It's a little bit ironic because I should have known that already since I'm on the way to becoming a web developer. I'll probably go with Avira if you recommend it.

Quote

I will write one virus story down if you are interested:

There is a virus i don't specifically remember its name, but it was a virus that can change what you have in your clipboard ( when you press ctrl+c the stuff go to your clipboard,  just saying if you don't familiar with it). So this virus was undetected because it was made that way ( there are some sites, where you can check if a file has any virus in it these sites check your file with the top 10-15 virus softwares, so if you don't want to download an antivirus and you think you found something skecthy then you can check those files there).

So for what they can use the information that you have in your clipboard? They don't use that information, instead they change the information there, and put other information there. To be more specific, this virus was made for stealing money from people using a clipboard trick. So if you are familiar with crypto currencies, you know that bitcoin have a specific address structure. Everyone has their own specific address, and these crypto addresses lets be it bitcoin or ethereum they are built in a different but specfic way. These hackers made an algorithm that can detect if you have an information structure in your clipboard, which is kind of like a bitcoin address structure. So the virus changes that address to another one(for an alternative bitcoin address that the hacker has) , so when you want to pay some money to someone via bitcoin, you will send it to the wrong person. It is very smart from the hacker's perspective, because we are talking about cryptocurrency the hacker can't be traced back who he is(or with just very very great effort).

Most of the time if you want to pay someone via using cryptocurrency you ask for their address and then you copy that because it is really long it can have numbers letters and capital letters in it as well, so it would be silly to write it down by hand ,because you can easily make some mistakes. So thats why they made the virus this way. Overall this hacker's address has more than 2 million dollars on it, and because of blockchain and because it is public, you can see the transactions there. You can only see different kind of addresses that sent him x amount of dollars. So it is crazy.

Overall you have to be very careful with viruses, thats why i wrote this story down.  Have a great day!

Haha kinda scary thought that such a simple program can steal that much money.

Edited March 18, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[Gesundheit2]

Thanks life, you're awesome ?

[Gesundheit2]

I'm starting to think that what people call a religious experience or God experience or direct consciousness, etc... is actually my baseline state of consciousness. No one I know in real life talks about any of the stuff here from experience. All of them parrot religious wisdom without comprehending basically anything, because they're mostly materialists and wear the religious mask due to conformity/out of peer pressure. I always found trouble relating to others, now I'm thinking that's because we're not on the same frequency to begin with, hence I still manage to relate eventually with some effort. The people on here and on other substance-induced awakenings sites create a lot of drama around God and view it as a weird/rare artifact, which indicates that they don't experience it long or deeply enough, or that they're full of ego and the contrast brings them to their knees. I can't be fully sure until I try the drugs first, but boy does it seem like what they consider God is just the mundane to me. I wonder if that is actually the case, and if it is then what would a drug do? For me to actually be efficient in the materialist world, I put lots of efforts, which seems effortless for almost everyone else. Sometimes I struggle to think a sentence. Sometimes I wonder how people can go on and on and ramble about anything basically non-stop when I can't speak about anything from memory. Almost every time I talk or respond to someone whether online or in real life, I find myself automatically tapping into the words themselves in the moment without much tapping into memory. In other words, I rarely rely on memory or the subconscious mind to think or interact with people, rather I mostly talk from the now. I actually used to have more trouble in the past couple of years when I was fully dedicated to spiritual practice, right now I'm not at that frequency and life feels somewhat easier, albeit being less happier.

[Gesundheit2]

I used to have low IQ and EQ, but I used to (unconsciously) think a lot (not the same as overthinking) in order to make up for the low IQ, and somewhat the low EQ. In social interactions, my physical appearance (clothes, style, hygiene, glasses, elegant watch, etc...) used to do much of the work for me. People always assumed that I'm top tier and gave me leeway and special treatment without me actually saying or doing anything special, well except being successful in school which I don't consider an indicator of intelligence; people apparently think differently. Some people could see through me and treated me as I deserved which I found cruel or cold at the time but now I find fair and logical. I always lacked confidence and charisma, which is why I didn't have a lot of success with the opposite sex or with my former job as a sales representative. As for confidence, I used to do religious affirmations and they worked like magic. But charisma has always been a bitch with me. It's hard. You can't make a John Cena into The Rock. The gap is so big and obvious. Cena doesn't have charisma. The Rock has it. How and why? Nobody knows. I'm John Cena; boring, flat, unemotional, I even joke with monotonality, etc... So, in order to fit in with the expectation that I'm top tier, I used to counter the lack of charisma by acting like a hypermaniac with verbal diarrhea. Luckily, I didn't do that for long, because I actually got burned out quickly, but jeez looking back now I definitely was disgusting I would kill myself. Right now, I still don't have the charisma that I want but at least I'm comfortable with myself, which allows me to act somewhat charismatic and it seems authentic when I do so.

But back to the original IQ topic, right now my IQ levels are average or slightly above average according to the test. However, in a way I feel dumber because I don't think as much as I used to, sometimes I doubt my ability to think. But when I think even for a little, I'm smarter than many people. As for my EQ, I can now read other people's energy and emotions very easily and with very good accuracy probably because I can read myself, but I'm still working on how to respond correctly in a way that not only promises a win-win scenario but actually guarantees and secures it. In theory, my EQ is very high, but in practice it's still below average. It sucks, but it will change with more practice and awareness.

Edited March 18, 2022 by Gesundheit2

[zurew]

4 hours ago, Gesundheit2 said:

I should have known that already since I'm on the way to becoming a web developer

Good luck with that!

Do you want to be a frontend developer or a backend one or a full stack? Do you want to get into that field because of money or you are just interested in it?

One skill that is going to be essential down the road is a good googling skill and the ability to being able to read documentation. If you can google for the right questions and if you save some sites that can help you to find answers for your bug problems it can save a lot of time.

There is this thing called google-dorking. You can use google dorks to get much more specific results for whatever you want to search.

For example:

• if you use site:actualized.org intext:love  ---> google will only give you pages that are on actualized.org and all those sites will have the word love at least once in them.

But basically a good rule of thumb is that whatever coding problem you will have down the road the chances are that someone already solved it or encountered with it, is very high. So if you don't have a lot of time to struggle or grapple with a problem, you can search for it.

Firstly recognise the problem well and then articulate it in a google search way.(Of course there are some cases, where you need to use google just to recognise what errors or problems you have that is also powerful)

One other helpful thing to solve coding problems better, could be using different kind of coding forums and asking your questions there.

 

Edited March 18, 2022 by zurew