My self exploration journal 2

[Preety_India]

 

One thing I need to know is how to switch mental states from depressed to happy in quick succession. 

It's very easy to get depressed. 

So yes this is a real struggle. 

I shouldn't let a day be wasted feeling depressed. 

 

[Preety_India]

Sometimes I feel weary and tired and I want to rest and..... 

[diamondpenguin]

@Preety_India search for what makes you happy. Idk if it'll work for you though, it worked for me though. 

Edited July 12, 2020 by diamondpenguin
Love

[Preety_India]

@diamondpenguin thank you for your kind words. 

 

[Preety_India]

Certain things suck the motivation out of me. 

It's difficult to feel active all the time. 

But I try. 

My sole focus for the next 6 months is me. 

Also I want to stress more on explicit thinking. That is thinking before you take leap. I've been pretty impulsive all my life but this quality has also helped me to have a sharp sense of intuition. 

The problem is if I use too much of my brain to think, I stop thinking with my heart. 

And thinking with my heart is essential for the growth of intuition. 

But anyway there should be a balance. 

Also I wanted to bring in the rhythm system. 

Negativity sucks. It takes away a lot of the energy that you have. 

 

[Preety_India]

My goal is to focus more on motivation and inspiration.

To work extremely hard. 

I have always been a hard worker, an extreme hard worker all my life. 

Hard work is what got me so far. 

Sometimes it becomes difficult to convince myself to work harder. 

But that's what I need to do. 

I have to prepare myself for the moment. 

There is no point in being lazy. 

I know tiredness sets in after years of hard work and that's what happened to me. 

But that's okay. 

I can look for new ways to getting inspiration and motivation. 

. 

 

[Florian]

13 hours ago, Preety_India said:

 

I will see if I can put my witchcraft to any use. 

 

 

 

What did you mean by that?

+ 

Have you ever heard of the Sedona Method? I just read this whole journal and thought to myself that the Sedona Method could help you a lot. Probaply because I just use it so much and to me it's like I guess what 5-Meo-DMT is to many people here (don't take this too serious I don't know much about psychedelics it just seems like many see it as the pill for everything here)

 

[Preety_India]

@Florian what's the Sedona method? 

 

[Preety_India]

Sometimes I feel like I am so used to being depressed that I don't feel upset anymore. 

 

[Preety_India]

Yes I have been looking for new ways for motivation and inspiration.. 

 

[Florian]

@Preety_India it's about letting go emotions. The book about it is on Leos booklist. I think it's just called The Sedona Method and it's written by Hale Dwoskin

Edit: Basically it's about letting go asking yourself some questions, but there is also this great explanation about 4 deeper wishes that every human being has that are the cause for those emotions in the first place. You can let these wishes go as well and then it clears you up a lot deeper. The wishes are the wish for control, recogniton/love, security and being seperated. Obviously to understand those you should read the book, if you want me to write more about it I can do that though.

Edited July 12, 2020 by Florian

[Florian]

And it also explains emotions in general and the right handling with them.

[Preety_India]

Digging into sources of inspiration or motivation 

• One thing can be watching motivational videos 
• Keeping 10 minutes for focus only and warming myself up 
• Keeping a timer to track 
• Being positive. Focus on mental state 
• Keeping high levels of physical energy 
• Gently coaxing myself 
• Not giving into negativity. 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

One thing that I noticed was that Africans have really inspired me very deeply. 

I didn't know much about African culture. 

But learning something new everyday about African culture is helping me greatly. 

I see Africans are very hard workers. I saw this in the videos.. They are extremely hard working. 

They make amazing art and craft out of sheer hard work. 

This inspired me to work harder. 

Survival is a key component in Africa. It's not easy to survive in Africa under a harsh weather and scarce opportunities for vegetation. Most animals are in the forests who also have a hard time surviving during droughts. 

Water is a huge problem in Africa because it's not easily available. Especially in the jungles where a lot of animals need water to just survive. 

So survival in Africa is a tough job. Yet the African people have a great spirit to make it through day to day. 

 

And survival teaches a lot of ground values necessary for success. 

Africans have a strong traditional value system grounded in honesty and humility. 

They take life as it comes without having extraordinary demands. They are simple people who try to make life simple and logical. 

A lot of African practices directly stem from logic. 

They need the system to be a certain way to function in the right direction. This is a ground truth 

Within a very short span of time, I learned a lot from Africa and African culture. 

Africans place a huge value on color. They like things colorful because they probably see it as a way to decorate life and living. 

They usually prefer bright colors. As seen in the picture. 

 

 

[Preety_India]

Energy and motivation or drive are two most important components. 

 

Sometimes I just get too worn out and feel spaced out like I can't remember stuff.

The frame which is required here is 

Energy 

Motivation 

Goals 

Action 

 

If I follow the above 4 strictly it will help me

 

Because of my depression and childhood trauma it's very difficult to feel passionate about anything. 

It's like being stuck in the same rut. And not doing anything about it but at at same time being aware of being stuck in the rut. 

There is no straightforward way or short cut to motivation. It has to be built. 

I think this is also a problem for men in dating. If they want to seriously date, they need to get off the couch and meet more people in life. But they may not get the motivation to actually the work that is needed like Leo says 

I also blame culture somewhat.

For example when I order takeout food., I'm less likely to cook. 

When the takeout restaurant is closed, I get off and start cooking on my own. 

This is human nature.. We get lazy when something is easily available. 

We work hard when we know it wont be easily available otherwise. The modern generation, my generation, is used to getting things that are wished. I can spend money and get what I want.. But is that motivation? 

Our ancestors worked very hard for stuff that we take for granted. 

Back in my father's time there was no internet in the 90s. They didn't have smartphones. So my dad had to use a payphone sometimes.. 

I never think of a payphone. There is no payphone in my place. Because everyone around me has a cellphone a mobile phone that they keep stupidly staring at. 

So yeah, human nature can get pretty awkward and docile and dependent 

It's easy to be lazy.. 

I never had this problem in school. I was very motivated during my school years.. Back then, nobody had to tell me what to do. I would just jump at everything. I was super motivated back then. 

Somehow this reminds me of the ants and the grasshopper Aesop tale. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited July 12, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

 

The frame which is required here is 

Energy 

Motivation 

Goals 

Action

 

I also wanted to discuss the importance of insulation. 

Insulation is extremely important to growth. 

 

[Preety_India]

The energy that is a part of motivation, I will simply call it motivational energy or MEE... Motivation enriched energy. 

Now this MEE is very different from normal energy that is required for doing things. 

This energy creates a drive or motivation. 

Primal energy is basic energy required for everything in the beginning. 

For example of you're a terminally ill patient you will have extremely low primal energy or starting energy. 

Zero starting fuel.

Starting fuel is absolutely essential for getting anything done. 

 

Insulation and deep focus (without distraction) helps conserve both MEE and primal energy and doesn't allow it to dissipate easily. 

 

Edited July 13, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

Visualization and inspiration for MEE

MEE simply doesn't drop from the sky. 

You have to build it up. 

How do you build it? 

This is like a fireball that you need to build up. 

This is some pathetic crude work. It's same like hunting a partner for sex. You simply have to do it and there are no short cuts or beautiful elegant ways of doing it. 

It is riddled with frustration just like dating is riddled with frustration of rejections and efforts. 

 

You will need to visualize yourself slowly being motivated. 

Let's say you have a huge amount of pending office data that needs you to read it and sort through it. 

You might feel very lazy and not want to do it and keep pushing it for tomorrow. Because you know it's stressful. 

 

One thing is that you need to lessen the stress factor. The build up of stress will actually prevent you from wanting to do it. The stress will like an eater of energy.. 

Stress can sometimes get you so overwhelmed just with the idea that there is so much to read and sort that it will almost impair you and you will dismiss the project at hand

Once you have handled the stress factor really well, the next step is to visualize how you are going to be motivated. 

Use any form of inspiration, crude or modern. 

Visualize yourself in happy surroundings. 

. Visualize yourself being happy doing it 

 

Visualize yourself positively. 

Visualize yourself getting motivated and feeling the energy of motivation, not like pressure, but happiness. 

Both visualization and inspiration are awesome 

But I can use a host of other techniques to get me on board the motivation ship. 

 

Edited July 13, 2020 by Preety_India

[Preety_India]

 

You can either happily motivate yourself or motivate yourself with pressure. 

The problem with pressure is that it's stressful and unhealthy. 

But some people like getting pressure. They see it positively and don't seem to be stressed out by pressure. It's similar to negative motivation. 

For example body fat. 

Some people love being called and praised. It helps them give up bad diets and focus on getting healthier. This is a part of body positivity. 

However for some fat people, fat shaming is better. It works as negative motivation. They work on themselves with great enthusiasm when they are shamed and they use this criticism to actually work on their issues. 

But this is not the same for all. 

 

So happy motivation has far more advantages over unhealthy motivation. 

I wouldn't mind a bit of unhealthy Motivation for a temporary period of time to serve my purpose.. 

It's like whatever works works. 

 

 

 

 

[Preety_India]

 

 

The frame which is required here is 

Energy 

Motivation 

Goals 

Action

Insulation 

Fortification 

 

You will need Fortification. By Fortification I mean rapid exclusive growth. 

But this cannot happen without insulation. 

You need growth, spurious growth. This needs some investment and hard work. Like Stage Orange. 

But at the same time, this needs insulation from distraction.. 

Pure focus/effort  and insulation are key components. 

Are you purely focused on your goals or just half assing it. 

 

Edited July 13, 2020 by Preety_India