No motivation to change for a better health?

[Kay100]

I often hear stories about people saying they would rather suffer all the illnesses than give up sugar and their favorite desserts. I can’t understand the psychology of it. Why would people rather suffer than change to a more healthier diet?

Recently I found out that one of my friends was one of those people. She’s always loved sugary foods and when I suggest that she can eat more healthy she would not admit that her diet is not healthy and shows me that she has cabbage and carrots in her fridge. I don’t understand the reason for the denial?

Later I tried to let her know why sugar is not good, and I told her that she can make her own healthy desserts by just replacing sugar and flour with healthy ingredients, she never responded to that. I’m guessing she thinks it’s too much hassle?

But she’s been suffering for months of all kinds of symptoms and her GP couldn’t figure out the cause. After suffering for so long, she’s still not motivated to make some positive change in her diet and lifestyle, I just don’t get it?

I don’t know why feel so annoyed about this and I feel kind of angry... I don’t even know what I’m angry about... I just don’t understand the reason, it’s not logical to me... how can someone keep on suffering and don’t want to do anything about it?

[Roy]

10 minutes ago, Kay100 said:

how can someone keep on suffering and don’t want to do anything about it?

It's one thing to have knowledge that things like sugar or smoking are generally bad for you. It's another to be truly aware of how deep the suffering can go. Most people will verbally acknowledge it's not good for them. The ego won't realize or fully admit the true consequences until it is completely engrossed in them, and by then it's mostly too late. Your friend isn't suffering enough for that to click yet, which is sad but it is what it is.

You're angry and frustrated because you personally are aware, and are trying to make her aware as well. But you have to let go and accept things as they are. It's likely no matter how much preaching or educating you attempt it will be pointless, you can't lead a mule to water. There will just be endless resistance.

Let her come to her realizations on her own, and gently support her along the way. That is the path which will lead to peace for you @Kay100

Hope this helps - Roy

[Michael569]

Some people have built their identity around suffering. It becomes who they are, how they think and how they perceive people. Every conversation gets turned to them and their sickness. It becomes the ultimate excuse, they don't want help but they will leech your positive energy. 

There is a medical name for people who become healed but don't know how to go on because their life was built around being sick and fragile. You cannot help them and frankly, you shouldn't even try if they are not receptive. 

 

Edited June 6, 2020 by Michael569

[Elisabeth]

Number of reasons.

At the very moment you crave sugar, trying to resist that craving feels like more suffering than whatever illness is there (or might be there in the future).

After you've "kinda tried" and failed a number of time, you just don't feel like change is something you can do. Just talk about diet will bring up a feeling of failure. 

Identity and habit, as mentioned above. What you eat is part of who you are, those tastes bring back childhood memories and bond you with your family. 

Sometimes it's even resistance against authority figures. Don't think you're the first one telling her that sugar isn't healthy. 

And sometimes, if depressed, the simple in the moment pleasure of sweet taste is one of the few things left you enjoy about life. You wouln't want to give up something that brings you enjoyment, however crude, if you have little of it overall, would you?

Leave her alone. Or invite her for healthy cake, but don't be surprised if it doesn't like it too much. 

[Yarco]

Short-term gain vs long-term suffering.

If you choose to eat your favorite sugary snack, there's a 100% chance it will taste delicious right now.

Getting heart disease, diabetes, or cancer is something that seems far off in the future and may or may not affect you. So it's easier to mentally minimize those chances.

If you hate your job and life, and you have no energy or willpower, junk food might be the only opportunity you have to get an easy win and some enjoyment.

[Onemanwolfpac]

On 05/06/2020 at 11:34 PM, Kay100 said:

I often hear stories about people saying they would rather suffer all the illnesses than give up sugar and their favorite desserts. I can’t understand the psychology of it. Why would people rather suffer than change to a more healthier diet?

Recently I found out that one of my friends was one of those people. She’s always loved sugary foods and when I suggest that she can eat more healthy she would not admit that her diet is not healthy and shows me that she has cabbage and carrots in her fridge. I don’t understand the reason for the denial?

Later I tried to let her know why sugar is not good, and I told her that she can make her own healthy desserts by just replacing sugar and flour with healthy ingredients, she never responded to that. I’m guessing she thinks it’s too much hassle?

But she’s been suffering for months of all kinds of symptoms and her GP couldn’t figure out the cause. After suffering for so long, she’s still not motivated to make some positive change in her diet and lifestyle, I just don’t get it?

I don’t know why feel so annoyed about this and I feel kind of angry... I don’t even know what I’m angry about... I just don’t understand the reason, it’s not logical to me... how can someone keep on suffering and don’t want to do anything about it?

Lazy. Why study stem when you can get a degree in fluffy bunnies? Its the same for body positivity. Fast food and high fructose corn syrup is killing everybody but shutdown the global economy for covid. Little did we know, the cure to covid is mass rioting and looting (not serious). 

Its laziness to answer your question. Fitness and health is a better look. Proven longevity and quality of life.

[King Merk]

On 6/5/2020 at 7:04 PM, Kay100 said:

I don’t know why feel so annoyed about this and I feel kind of angry... I don’t even know what I’m angry about... I just don’t understand the reason, it’s not logical to me... how can someone keep on suffering and don’t want to do anything about it?

You’re creating suffering in yourself out of the desire to control someone else... good intentioned sure but try to focus on yourself and your own development

Edited June 9, 2020 by King Merk

[Hansu]

On 6/6/2020 at 5:04 AM, Kay100 said:

But she’s been suffering for months of all kinds of symptoms and her GP couldn’t figure out the cause. After suffering for so long, she’s still not motivated to make some positive change in her diet and lifestyle, I just don’t get it?

I had three back disc injuries before I understood that I have to change. For the first two I just waited them to heal, without healing the root problem. I didnt know there was a root problem, everyone told me that "Its in your genes, everyone in the family tree has these problems" so I just waited them out thinking I could do nothing about it.

Fact is, my family tree has no gene problem. It has an attitude and exercise problem Could be same for your friend?