How To Cope With Guilt ?

[Time Traveler]

Hi, everyone !

I have reached visible success with my strongest negative emotions fear and anger.

These were nasty, but relatively easy to deal with cause they was so strong.

Now I started to see that I always  feel guilty for no reason. This is much more subtle emotion, hard to be aware of, hiding in the background, but poisoning my life nevertheless. 

I conquered anger by just observing it and that was easy, it didn't hide. But with guilt it's different, when I look at it, it hides but continues to live in the background.

I worked with fear by doing what I was afraid of, but that doesn't work with guilt.

Could it be that I just need to rise my consciousness level so that I can observe guilt easy ? Or is there some other method ?

[Mal]

@Time Traveler

Guilt in my opinion is a big one. 

From what I can tell (for me) it stems from a programme that tells me I should not be who I am, that I must take care of others needs and well being. 

It is beginning to look like a pathology that doesn't allow all seperate forms to be seperate forms.  A kind of self hatred of being seperate.

The New Age system doesn't help much with this, perhaps perpetuates it somewhat with its fake "high consciousness" values being imposed like any other religion?

Not very Integral!

Just my thoughts on this right now

Edited July 11, 2016 by Mal

[egoeimai]

I think you can fight guilty emotions by thinking that you are not the reason things are happening around you and you are not the center of the cause.

That you cant control things and people and by not blaming you own acts and thoughts because nobody's perfect.

We act as we act because we know that this is the right reaction at the moment. This is far away from the emotions of guilt that come next. When you do something you know that its right. Then why you blame yourself after? Its nonsense.

Also by not having damaging thoughts and self injuring. Some time we do that. Maybe do something good afterwards so that it can make you feel better. But the thing is to not feel guilty at the first place.

Or be aware of what you do every moment. But that's a bit difficult and it takes effort and practice. I dont know If you can control it all the time and not drive you insane or neurotic or anxious.

By the way...im not an expert obviously. 

[Mal]

@popi

You don't meditate, do you? LOL

[Nathalie]

@Time Traveler

First, you can choose to call it responsibility instead, which is, in my opinion, more objective . See it neutrally, it helps... because you are never the only one responsible, are you?

Guilt has much to do with education, religion and it's often used by people who want you to act the way they've decided.. They want to shine like an authority but in fact they aren't..

So one could say, as long as you feel guilty you are the victim and not the doer.

When I have this kind of problems,

- I sit down and relaxe my mind (e.g. observing my breath until my mind is quiet)

- I search it in my body (where is it? What does it feel like? Is it moving?...)

- then I look at the problem from differents perspectives, ask questions, Do I feel it all the time? What's the use of it? For me? For the others? do I really have to get rid of it?  Or can I acknoledge it because it also heps me to be attentive, if so can I use an other way?...

Just stop to be the victim of underlying, unspoken expectations

 

[ProblemSolving]

You have to see guilt as what it is. It is a tool to make you adapt to the standards of somebody or a system by assaulting you with negative emotions. A freakin good tool to manipulate people. The fun starts when you resist to accept guilt in certain situations. I still struggle with guilt, but sometimes I own the moment. And it feels great. Somebody says something to me so that I should feel some sort of guilt but I just decide to feel good about myself. Because that is what I want to feel. 

 

[Allinthemind]

Keep reminding yourself that you're doing the right thing and redefining your own sense of morality. You can feel guilty when you are changing a bad habit, but with repetition, the guilt eases.

[99th_monkey]

guilt is how we are raised. "do this, dont do that, or this will, or wont happen". Guilt is a prime code in our operating system. one of the main tools of that crazy border collie, maya, as some would put it. Its all illusory. but finding it, and recognizing it is up to the individual. Everyone's guilt is the same but different.  

[Christian]

For me, I also have a problem with guilt and have dealt with it for over a year. It has been painful and you're not alone my friend. Guilt is one of those emotions that are very tricky to deal with. I have tried various different techniques  and many have not work because they are not tackling the root cause of guilt which is self hate. Guilt exists as a result of self hate and its purpose is to create even more of it. 

Note that if this is the case, then all guilt can be solved by cultivating self love and accepting yourself 100%
 

 

[charlie2dogs]

On 7/11/2016 at 7:33 AM, Time Traveler said:

Hi, everyone !

I have reached visible success with my strongest negative emotions fear and anger.

These were nasty, but relatively easy to deal with cause they was so strong.

Now I started to see that I always  feel guilty for no reason. This is much more subtle emotion, hard to be aware of, hiding in the background, but poisoning my life nevertheless. 

I conquered anger by just observing it and that was easy, it didn't hide. But with guilt it's different, when I look at it, it hides but continues to live in the background.

I worked with fear by doing what I was afraid of, but that doesn't work with guilt.

Could it be that I just need to rise my consciousness level so that I can observe guilt easy ? Or is there some other method ?

you have guilt because you are a human being identity with an ego, you have not conquered anger yet, for as long as you are the human identity anger will be lurking close by and when you least expect it, it will appear out of no where, yes i know you are seeing it but you have not conquered the human identity yet, and to do that requires a fully awakened or self realized consciousness.  so the answer to your question is the evolution of your consciousness, now how will you raise it? what can you do to raise your level of consciousness or cause a greater awakening of your consciousness.  do you hold a belief system at present, have you examined the programing that you have been subject to and have accepted into your own belief system. so far in your life you have been looking through a cloudy glass,  one that warps the perception of what you see, feel, think, and do,  how now can you see clearly to liberate yourself from your programing and false belief that is keeping you functioning as the human identity.

[MIARIVEL]

@Time Traveler Hi Time Traveler, have you asked yourself why do you feel guilty? why are you allowing yourself to keep feeling guilty? what is this guilt doing to you? 

It is normal to feel guilt, but once you find out the reason why, you are on your next step to overcoming it. Sometimes we make mistakes, sometimes we have regrets and sometimes we do things we never thought we would be and we shock ourselves in the type of person we think we have become. But at any time we can change the trajectory of our life, this all starts with the decision to choose what we focus on. 

 

[Time Traveler]

@MIA.RIVELI see a beggar and feel guilty for him. What is the reason ?

[MIARIVEL]

@Time Traveler In a dream this usually represent someone who is seeking knowledge. It can also imply sorrow, worry or distress so maybe you feel guilty for not helping this beggar?

[Sen]

On 25.07.2016 at 5:36 PM, Time Traveler said:

@MIA.RIVELI see a beggar and feel guilty for him. What is the reason ?

Look closer to what belief is triggered when you experience it.

[Rocky]

You probably already know this but remember, you are your awareness not your thoughts, therefore you have the ability to recognise these negative thoughts without attaching to them whilst still being aware of them, i personally find the worst thing i can do is associate and believe the negative emotion or thought is part of me, instead i just recognise and observe them but dismiss them by realising that they are only a part of me if i let them or want them to be, the awareness can always be focused on other thoughts and emotions.

Edited August 3, 2016 by Rocky
more detailed explanation

[30secs]

On 7/26/2016 at 10:36 PM, Time Traveler said:

@MIA.RIVELI see a beggar and feel guilty for him. What is the reason ?

On 7/26/2016 at 10:36 PM, Time Traveler said:

 

Projections of your mind(false)

language(I see a beggar and feel guilty for him. What is the reason ?), emotions(I can feel my self as a homeless man), logic, intuitions(I should help the beggar because it feels right, if not I look myself heartless).

Look yourself talking, all this stuff has been discussed "How your mind distort Reality" . Thats why getting rid of the ego is very important, because there should be an ego in the first place before all this guilt can occur.

Edited August 18, 2016 by 30secs