Am I Heading In The Right Direction?

[electroBeam]

So I want to get involved in personal development, because I'm very aware of the fact that one day I will die, and if I don't do something now, I'm going to regret it. The only problem is, I'm not entirely sure what I want to do, or what I should do. I know I want to impact the world somehow, or get involved in a startup, but not exactly sure which startup or why. 

Recently I have taken on a lot of projects, volunteering projects at university, being apart of toastmasters, hanging out with friends moreso(improving my introvertedness). I have been doing these projects for 6 months now, and while these tasks I have taken on for myself are positive, and what a 'good person' does, I'm not feeling any better about doing them. I feel kind of out of place, and weirdly like doing these projects are a waste of time. I'm not getting any meaning out of doing these projects. Its hard to describe, the feeling you get when your doing something that is pointless.

Does everyone feel like this after doing activities you should be doing after 6 months, or is my dissatisfaction telling me something? If it is, what should i do instead to improve my life? I don't want to just sit back and piss my life away, I want to do something that will develop my experience, and grow myself.

[J. M. Wigglesworth]

Glad to see you want in. Here's a very simple model of what you should be doing right now.

1. Find your life purpose.

You have vague feelings and intent. You must distill a purpose out of that haze. Achieving incredible results requires a concentration of force into a particular area(I assume you want kickass results). Find that area. Furthermore, the feeling of fulfillment is most clear when achieving/ working toward a goal and fulfillment is the antithesis to the regret you wish to avoid so much. As Leo put it "If you don't have a life purpose, then your purpose is to find a life purpose."

 

2.Build your foundation.

Form a routine that will strengthen the core of your personal development: you. There's a lot of things you can do which if practiced well and consistently can turn into massive benefits for you. Don't try to take on too many at a time(3 is the max, don't push it, consistency above all else.)

Here are a few.

Meditation.

Self-image reprogramming.

Cleaning up diet.

Exercise

Rhythmic deep breathing.

Reading/listening to high quality self-help content.

 

One last thing... stick around for the long haul. You're eager to jump into to the exciting world of self-help. I get it. I really do. Know it's going to take some time. Just stick with this stuff. It will blow your mind open, implode it, rejigger your neural networks and launch you back into the darkness again, only a little bit wiser. It's awesome . Become a self-help junky like us forum-goers here and in a few years, after you've developed some traction with powerful habits and clear life purpose(a supportive environment helps too), you can skyrocket. 

 

 

[charlie2dogs]

15 hours ago, electroBeam said:

So I want to get involved in personal development, because I'm very aware of the fact that one day I will die, and if I don't do something now, I'm going to regret it. The only problem is, I'm not entirely sure what I want to do, or what I should do. I know I want to impact the world somehow, or get involved in a startup, but not exactly sure which startup or why. 

Recently I have taken on a lot of projects, volunteering projects at university, being apart of toastmasters, hanging out with friends moreso(improving my introvertedness). I have been doing these projects for 6 months now, and while these tasks I have taken on for myself are positive, and what a 'good person' does, I'm not feeling any better about doing them. I feel kind of out of place, and weirdly like doing these projects are a waste of time. I'm not getting any meaning out of doing these projects. Its hard to describe, the feeling you get when your doing something that is pointless.

Does everyone feel like this after doing activities you should be doing after 6 months, or is my dissatisfaction telling me something? If it is, what should i do instead to improve my life? I don't want to just sit back and piss my life away, I want to do something that will develop my experience, and grow myself.

it is because you are doing these things for the wrong reason.

[Yukise99]

I think a new perspective on why you feel these projects are meaningless to you is because your definition of what a "good person" is a construct given to you by society and other people. Volunteering projects that have no meaning to you will be meaningless if you do not see a meaning in them. It's like giving change to a homeless person and expecting it to end homelessness. If you want to help out a homeless person then by all means please do, but don't expect giving change will make you a "better" person. Here's something for you to think about, who deserves $5 more a waiter busting his chops or a homeless guy on the street? I say the waiter because he has much more obligations to fulfill, but that is my opinion. You might say that a "good person" would give it to a homeless person, but are you that type of good person? How do you truly feel about this situation? And would you act upon it or go with what society considers to be the good choice? 

Once again realize that there are no right or wrong answer for this scenario, it is a thought exercise designed for you to think about who or what you really are. What exactly do you want from personal development? I highly doubt you want to be an idealistic altruistic spiritual figure that you project yourself by doing "positive projects that a good person does". Your ending statement is that you want to develop your experience and grow yourself. Ask yourself "How do I want to grow myself within the next 5 years?" Do you want to be funnier? Do you want to entertain life with philosophical thoughts and be a better writer/philosopher? Do you want to go on spiritual retreat and experience the voided existence of reality? I don't know what you want so I ask you to think about it. And of course once you figure it out, your next step would be to set goals and work at them. There's really no one size fit all answer. Explore, create and make mistakes. It will all count for something, but never what you think it is. 

[MIARIVEL]

@electroBeam What are you passionate about? What makes you happy and drives you to want to do more of it? Perhaps you are not finding satisfaction in doing these things because you are after something bigger and better or something more challenging? 

Why don't you try something that you are passionate about by getting outside of your comfort zone? something to challenge you and your mind? for me (being a life coach) I feared public speaking for as long as I could remember and I had people asking me to give talks to teenagers to motivate them, talk about confidence and self esteem and talk to corporate organisations to motivate staff to love their job and who they work for more. I was absolutely terrified of the thought of doing this but knowing that being a coach is my passion and purpose, i felt the fear and did it anyway and I never looked back. This then opened the door to more opportunities for me. So maybe think about what could be something to challenge yourself on in relation to personal development.

Dont think of anything you are doing as a waste of time, I believe anything to do with personal development (weather you realise it or not) is helping to develop you in some way or another. Weather you are learning something great from the experience or you've learnt that this isn't really for you and to try something else. Its all about growing and learning and developing.