Alfonsoo

Can’t ego die

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I’ve been experimenting with LSD, and I’ve been getting great insight and all of that but un this las trip I was really able to see how the ego creates the life story and how it pulls the focus away to keep it self from discovering the tru nature and this is because a felt how my true self (no self I guess) was graying to discover itself but the ego tricks keep fiercely opposing this breakthrough. I felt I understood the nature of this but I didn’t quite get the ego death. I still identified as me, although a very distorted sense of self at this point but still a sense of self. This is the second time I can’t get a full breakthrough. This was on 100ug. How can I go full ego death nex time. How can I calm down the ego until it fully extinguishes?

also, from all the research I’ve done I feel like this was an unusually profound and embodying trip for 100ug, I think it might even be comparable to what people ma experience on DMT. What do you think

Edited by Alfonsoo

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Trying to kill the Ego, is Ego. 

Become Aware of the Ego, Know Ego is part of the Self. Let is fall off you like a cocoon, just enjoy, don't force.

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1 hour ago, Alfonsoo said:

How can I calm down the ego until it fully extinguishes?

Inspect the thoughts & beliefs you are attached to. “It” will not “extinguish”. It goes out more like an alien demon baby ripping through your chest trying to drag you to hell by your innards, while mindf’g you in ways you’ve never thought of or imagined, which are paradoxically expressions of your own sneakiness.  And you just don’t judge it. Don’t condemn it. Don’t wish it away or put it out of the light. Don’t make it wait, and kick & scream for attention. Find balance & equanimity through the practices, and love everything it does unconditionally. I’m not suggesting you think about it, and find your thinking way to ‘acceptance’. Just love “it” no matter what “it” does, unconditionally, without - prior to even - thinking about “it”. Bring “it” intimately close, into your space. Genuinely want to see it, learn it’s nature like a curious impartial student. Give it your attention, which is powerful, and all that is needed. If that didn’t “work”, you are not loving unconditionally, so uncover the conditions by writing about how you’re feeling, shine the light of understanding on them. If that still doesn’t “work”, call an old priest & a young priest... 

Then when you’ve established the demon baby is gone, realize that’s merely a testimony to your sneakiness. It’s this sneaky...

God: Now go forth and remember what’s been revealed here.

The Ego: Ok, I will. 

 

 


  Nonduality & Meditations  Now

   “ ...every revolutionary act, is an act of love...”  - Zach de la Rocha

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