Andrewww

How to deal with stage orange environment when you're used to stage yellow/turq?

18 posts in this topic

The lack of stage green in their psyches is a bit of a red flag but I have to adapt somehow. 

 

 

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Is there really a Stage Orange environment?  Says what/who?

Edited by Joseph Maynor

firstphilosophy.org

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@Andrewww I'd start with not judging them for being whatever stage you peg them to be and realize that they're just human beings like you. Why do I think you're judging them? Well, your choice of words like this being "something to adapt to" or this being a problem worth sharing shows me that you kinda look down on them. Oh, and then there's you saying that a lack of stage green is a red flag. Seriously, just treat them like you would treat any other person and let go of this "the people around me are so underdeveloped"-mentality; that's just ego which loves to tell itself how high up on the SD-hierarchy it is.

And if you want to talk about a topic that is a bit more nuanced for the average person then do what you're doing right now: The Internet is your friend

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9 minutes ago, Andrewww said:

@Joseph Maynor I mean like a workplace full of people with stage orange mentality for example. 

What are those "people" though?  Like if you look at stuff where you're paying attention to just what's coming in your awareness ports.  And what are the thoughts that get attached to those "people"?  

Video on point to watch:

 

Edited by Joseph Maynor

firstphilosophy.org

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@Zizzero I'm bothered by it because I know they could be better but they aren't. If I was on their level of development or they were on mine then we would have an easier time. I simply want to know how to bridge ourselves together in a smoother way without clashing values.

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@Joseph Maynor What's coming in my awareness is that we sorta barely get along. I desire extreme levels of reasonable equality while they desire to be on top no matter what it takes. The thoughts that I attach to those "people" is that they could do better an the way they're operating in reality is not the most optimal for the whole system of humanity.

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13 minutes ago, Andrewww said:

@Zizzero I'm bothered by it because I know they could be better but they aren't. If I was on their level of development or they were on mine then we would have an easier time. I simply want to know how to bridge ourselves together in a smoother way without clashing values.

People can do with their lives whatever they want, it does not matter what you want. What you consider to be "better" might not be better in their eyes. 
What prevents you from relating to them probably isn't their development, but your judgment of their lack of development.
In terms of practical advice, here's what I'd suggest:
1. Let go of your judgement. Treat them as human beings, not as colors.
2. Don't impose your values on them; they have every right to do things differently than you and it doesn't make them bad people. What I mean is this: I rarely drink alcohol. When I go out into nightclubs for example and people ask me why I don't drink, I don't tell them that drinking water is better health-wise and that they probably only drink alcohol to cope with suppressed traumas even though it's probably true. I just tell why I made that decision and don't make a big deal out of it. No one likes teachers and know-betters, rather; people like people who treat them as equals. So, you don't want a clash of values, then don't clash values. However, I'm not saying don't have a spine or your own opinions; just don't lower the vibe of the interaction.

Edited by Zizzero

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18 minutes ago, Andrewww said:

@Joseph Maynor What's coming in my awareness is that we sorta barely get along. I desire extreme levels of reasonable equality while they desire to be on top no matter what it takes. The thoughts that I attach to those "people" is that they could do better an the way they're operating in reality is not the most optimal for the whole system of humanity.

If you could get what you want (your most sought-after objectives), would you be worried about equality?  The people in life standing on the sidelines of life screaming "no fair" often just don't like the game.  Don't hate the game.  Own the game.

 

Edited by Joseph Maynor

firstphilosophy.org

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@Zizzero Alright I'll let go of the judgement. I'm sure there are those who judge me the same way.

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@Joseph Maynor Well getting what I want is one of those things which is greater levels of equality. So no. Once equality becomes more well established and refined then I wouldn't worry about it as much. Maybe I misunderstood but this is my answer.

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@Joseph Maynor Don't hate the game? Is that the whole it's better to die a slave than to die a resister to the system- psyche switch to make oneself feel better? Very old move in history. Just embrace the madness :D. 

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@Andrewww There will always be people who will judge you. Time's not worth worrying about that. People judge cause that's what people do. 

But now, if you want a real challenge it's not just letting go of you judging them for who they are, it's letting go of judging them for judging you - that's when no-judgement gets really difficult.

As I said, people are people; they are nothing scary. Just treat them as what they are and not as what you project onto them. No worries, you got this ^_^

Edited by Zizzero

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@Zizzero Would you say the solution to no judgement is just a desire for love/compassion  than anger/hate?

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I don't think the fastest road to anything is desire. But I'm not an expert on spiritual things, so I'm not an expert on the big picture connections between judgement and emotions. But sure, when you truly love something you accept it for how it is and treat it with compassion rather than judgement. Judgment seems to me like it fundamentally comes from a place of not-understanding; you don't understand the thing you judge and decide to view it as an error; as something that "he should not have done" for example.

More practically speaking when it comes to social interactions: Instead of having a picture in mind of how this other person is supposed to be according to your moral beliefs, give them space to be themselves instead and have empathy and seek to understand them. However, this note is important because that's what nearly every green-person does wrong: Realizing that they are less developed than you does not count as understanding them. Forget this spiral dynamics stuff when talking to people; forget these labels. Don't put people in boxes. You say that you are green or higher, so it should not be news that people aren't evil. Everyone is just trying their best. To put everything I said into one sentence: Treat them like they are your best friend: You know that your best friend has a lot of mistakes to him, but you love him anyway. Also, you don't really care whether a topic is orange or green or turquoise, - me and my best friend we typically tell the same jokes and stories every time when we hang out - you just enjoy the vibe that you and your best friend have together.
Just imagine these people were yellow who like to talk about orange topics: there goes your judgement.

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@Zizzero  Yep.  Concepts can be a double-edged sword if not treated wisely.

Edited by Joseph Maynor

firstphilosophy.org

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We are all different and different things work for us. We are all valuable human beings and deserve respect because every single one of us can become great at something! Just because people aren’t like you or doing things different way or you don’t like them doesn’t mean there’s something wrong with them. Let them do their thing and focus on your thing and everyone should be happy :)


I have an opinion on everything :D

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Things that make you mad and piss you off. Use them as a mirror my friend. Its a neat trick. Abort the reactionary process when it comes up, and pull that mirror off your spiritual pocket.

Try to see where you do you do the things you despise, or consider to be lower, in what area, in what sense, to  what degree, its the very same process that will bring love and understanding, as you'll start to understand that you do the very same crap and you just do not see it, therefore understand how and why they do it.

Its an on the fly shadow work technique, milks juice and dodges reactionary states. Say in your head "Engage protocol Alpha 345" and do it.
Also do meditation, always do meditation, just always.

Hope it helps. :x

Edited by Yog

O.o Ooo

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