The Inherent Condition of Failure

[Jacobsrw]

Failure is something I typically deal very well with at a high capacity. However, ordinarily, today in a statistics psychology class I felt a strong urge of self defeat after coming to incorrect answers for simple questions. I have never been one to be very skilled at arithmetic. Though, the sensation I felt throughout the class was very demoralising. More so than bigger life changes or adverse situations. It would seem this plummeted feeling of failure has just dragged along with me since my history of maths as a child. 

Its not so much the maths that bothers me, as funnily enough I enjoy statistics. It’s more my instinctual reactive response to the situations involving it. Some inherent fear seems to be pervading my psyche that seems beyond my awareness at this stage.

Humbly, I feel I have developed enormously after starting, reflection, meditation, writing, cold showers and contemplation over the years. Yet there still remains some fundamental deep issues to attend to. A faculty of the unconscious that requires deeper exploring. Self enquiry is something I have been attempting to do now and then yet seem to lack any progress in it so far. Any feedback or insight in similar experiences would be greatly appreciated!

[seeking_brilliance]

Are there physiological reactions when this fear arises? Hot, clammy forehead or anything like that? 

[WelcometoReality]

@Jacobsrw what chooses what's right or wrong, Failure and success? Does failure actually exist?

It's good that one can see that it is past condition that arises. If it keeps coming up it might be needed to dive deeper into that to see what belief is there that causes it.

2 hours ago, Jacobsrw said:

Its not so much the maths that bothers me, as funnily enough I enjoy statistics. It’s more my instinctual reactive response to the situations involving it. Some inherent fear seems to be pervading my psyche that seems beyond my awareness at this stage.

 

[Nahm]

@Jacobsrw 

Perception+separate self in thought story of past = emotion “not good enough”

Sensation meets you there with a resounding insight - That’s not true!

But then sensation is hijacked by thought and so it is...

”Failure”. 

 

You can’t get it wrong brother. Can’t actually fail. Can only believe the thought in the misinterpretation. 

Tell another, you’ll see this more so true for you. Sorry, it’s just that way. 

We’re ‘takin back the perception’, are we not?

[zeroISinfinity]

God damn from where all These wise snakes come from ?

Scam guru Scam guru! ?

Everything explanes in previous post. 

Edited August 6, 2019 by zeroISinfinity

[Jacobsrw]

@seeking_brilliance yes to some degree. There is an increase in body temperature and tension. 

@WelcometoReality I would say these dichotomies are human constructions that have no real substance to them at all. However, since we have created them and become the creator that has deceived itself, it has is now a serious problem. Ie. morality, fear, love/hate, prejudice etc. Basically the human condition. So now there needs to be a purifying process it would seem.

For my example I would say it is quite possibly a self deception to which I require deconstructing. It just seems to be in an area the conscious mind does not want to go.

I agree and have felt the same. I feel more introspection and reflection is required in this matter. Hence why I wanted to do psychedelic makeup to penetrate the subconscious. 

[Jacobsrw]

@Nahm this I would agree with. However, I am not enlightened at this moment and may never be haha. However, I have made huge leaps in consciousness and conceptually understand all these concepts you speak of. It’s just the understanding of the psyche has not yet penetrated the physicality of my very being. This incessant human condition which we all seem to be conditioned by seems to be inherently programmed within us. 

So psychedelics do seem viable at this point for small discrepancies of this sort. Even though they are not necessary and I have a quite healthy and self aware lifestyle. The could be conducive to the subconscious mind.

What are people’s experiences of self enquiry? I believe in it though I have yet to have much traction.

[seeking_brilliance]

17 minutes ago, Jacobsrw said:

@seeking_brilliance yes to some degree. There is an increase in body temperature and tension. 

 

I think you could benefit from The Work by katie Byrons... I can also link you to a facebook group that the moderator can guide you through a session if you'd like. 

[Nahm]

@Jacobsrw

The “I” you refer to as, the “unenlightened one”, is a thought believed...no such “actual” thing. Nor is there an “enlightened one”. 

32 minutes ago, Jacobsrw said:

@Nahm this I would agree with. However, I am not enlightened at this moment and may never be haha.

Laughing because you haven’t realize that’s no more than a thought? Or because you haven’t admitted this to yourself, and don’t get ‘the joke’?

Which creates fear?  Terrified laughter’s pretty rare, no? 

Are you fearing gravity? 

Are you feeling it?

Ever ‘been’ without it?

However, I have made huge leaps in consciousness

Have let go of beliefs about me.

You’re already absolute perfection, in the face of all appearances, you = appearance “too”.. Feel into it. Let the ‘gravity’ show you how much more there is, of you. Keep it coming. Feel. 

♥️

and conceptually understand all these concepts you speak of. It’s just the understanding of the psyche has not yet penetrated the physicality of my very being.

We are sneaky creatures indeed, me too - but ‘physical’ is a thought, psyche too, you are not these - because you are you. 

Let beliefs go. Gravity’s already doing ‘it’s thing’, just let it go. It’ll suck it right out a black hole for ya, or melt it into the sun, or take it and explode it into a trillion new universes. Just let the beliefs go - aware of ‘them’.

This incessant human condition which we all seem to be conditioned by seems to be inherently programmed within us. 

Seems like the lady in the box gets cut in half too. Bruce Lipton says she doesn’t. I think he’s on to something. 

So psychedelics do seem viable at this point for small discrepancies of this sort. Even though they are not necessary and I have a quite healthy and self aware lifestyle. The could be conducive to the subconscious mind.

Yep. Watching another hour of tv is what’s not neccessary. Buyin more shit is what’s not nessessary. Psychedelics have never been more neccessary. I’d prioritize them over proper spelling even. Can’t wave at a particle, can’t apart the wave.  

What are people’s experiences of self enquiry? I believe in it though I have yet to have much traction.

That will always be a thought. Don’t believe it. Inquire through it. 

 

[Jacobsrw]

@zeroISinfinity haha it’s all in good sharing and discussion regardless of first enteree ?

@Nahm interesting narrative. I find it deeply thought provoking. However, I think you may have taken some of my statements too literately rather than figuratively.

I cannot figure whether this method of message is for patronising purposes toward the ego or whether they are for deep contemplation.

A formal response may have been more conducive. Thank you for your response though, it is much appreciated ?

Edited August 6, 2019 by Jacobsrw

[Nahm]

2 minutes ago, Jacobsrw said:

I cannot figure whether this method of message is for patronising purposes toward the ego or whether they are for deep contemplation.

Perfect.

You are forced to simply be you. Luckily, that’s the best possible scenario and you already are.

[Jacobsrw]

@Nahm Haha this is gold. The great paradox one could call it. I appreciate your input.

Edited August 6, 2019 by Jacobsrw

[Nahm]

@Jacobsrw Spend just one day helping others, doesn’t matter big or small. If you lift one heart, you’ve lifted them all. You can find some answers to everything that is, but in truth you’re seeking love - and it’s already you to give. This rhyming thing, no idea. 

[zeroISinfinity]

It's already you to give.

Give yourself to everything that is you.

? Dance

 

[WelcometoReality]

20 hours ago, Jacobsrw said:

@WelcometoReality I would say these dichotomies are human constructions that have no real substance to them at all. However, since we have created them and become the creator that has deceived itself, it has is now a serious problem. Ie. morality, fear, love/hate, prejudice etc. Basically the human condition. So now there needs to be a purifying process it would seem.

For my example I would say it is quite possibly a self deception to which I require deconstructing. It just seems to be in an area the conscious mind does not want to go.

I agree and have felt the same. I feel more introspection and reflection is required in this matter. Hence why I wanted to do psychedelic makeup to penetrate the subconscious. 

So they have no substance. They are an illusion. Part of maya. See that for what it is as it arise. When you think your failing, see that it's an illusion, past conditioning. It's only a problem if we believe that it's true.

You can contemplate on the matter by asking yourself where you learned that in the past.

What's the earliest memories of being a failure?

What's the earliest memories of being learnt that it's wrong to fail. Etc.

There are also feelings in the body connected to these thoughts. Where are they in the body and how do they feel. Go into these feelings.

Not questions for you to answer to me but something to ask yourself.

When we see where in the past these conditionings are learnt it's easier to let go of that conditioning.

 

Edited August 7, 2019 by WelcometoReality