Shaun

2 Gram Mushroom Trip Report

18 posts in this topic

I've no idea if there is any point in me writing this but I will anyway in the off chance that there is someone else to read it.

I made mushroom tea today by placing the mushrooms in a nylon strainer bag. I poured in boiling water and squashed the bag with a teaspoon for 15 minutes. I added honey afterwards. I drank only the tea and did not eat the mushrooms.

At 16 50 I drank the tea.

17 00 Runny nose

17 03 As I looked at the roughcast wall on the house, I could very easily make out patterns in the otherwise random distribution of small stones which coated the wall.

17 06 Apparent body high

17 11 Body high intensifies with random noise in my visual field like that from a digital camera sensor in darkness.

17 14 Even on plain surfaces, patterns were very apparent.

17 16 Went inside and covered my face with a shirt to block out light.

No more notes from this point, relying on memory

I directly experienced that I am nothing more than a series of sense perceptions held together by nothing.

I went for a cold shower. No longer could I say that the other objects in the room were separate from me. I looked at them from a state of intense presence. It was peaceful.

I lay down again. To even think thoughts was too much effort. I vaguely saw the interior of a space ship but that then vanished. I could no longer distinguish myself from anything, it all just faded away while intense presence watched. I don't think ego death happened.

I felt sheer terror for as while. I'm so utterly alone. Is this really solipsism? Am I torturing myself or just afraid of my infinite power?

I put on some channel higher self videos and for the brief moment I saw his face, it was in 3d, the guy was literally there in my computer screen. I quickly scrolled down and just listened which helped me to relax.

 

So it is 22 35 as I finish typing this. I'm still feeling very uneasy as the last effects wear off. There was not much visuals at all in this trip and even when I opened my eyes during the peak it didn't look as if everything was melting.

I'd consider this a bad trip overall but it was also a learning experience.

Edited by Shaun

“Words are like Leaves; And where they most abound, Much Fruit of Sense beneath is rarely found.”

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Allow the loneliness to teach you.


The how is what you build, the why is in your heart. 

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1 hour ago, Shaun said:

I'm so utterly alone. Is this really solipsism?

Yeah, it's a mindfuck.

God is all alone.

Keep going deeper.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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So I never slept much last night but despite that I am feeling back to normal this morning. Could anyone please shed some light on what happened? I think it was a mystical shift of some sort from the world of multiple perspectives to nonduality. Kind of like the mind probe that is me merged back into the one self but only partially.


“Words are like Leaves; And where they most abound, Much Fruit of Sense beneath is rarely found.”

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@Shaun What happened was: you are God imagining the whole universe. You can imagine whatever worlds you want. Mushrooms expand your possibility to imagine new worlds and become aware of yourself as God. You are barely starting to learn how powerful your God mind is. Everything is your mind. You are all alone dreaming all this stuff up. You cannot die. You have been sitting here imagining shit for all of eternity.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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6 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

@Shaun What happened was: you are God imagining the whole universe. You can imagine whatever worlds you want. Mushrooms expand your possibility to imagine new worlds and become aware of yourself as God. You are barely starting to learn how powerful your God mind is. Everything is your mind. You are all alone dreaming all this stuff up. You cannot die. You have been sitting here imagining shit for all of eternity.

How is it you cope with this, Leo? How can you accept that you will go back and forth between intense suffering and joy for all of eternity?


“Words are like Leaves; And where they most abound, Much Fruit of Sense beneath is rarely found.”

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Just now, Shaun said:

How is it you cope with this, Leo? How can you accept that you will go back and forth between intense suffering and joy for all of eternity?

Here’s the thing. These dualities must collapse:

Other people DO exist.

Other people DON’T exist.

 

Even though all is one, every expressed moment of form is utterly sacred. Every. Single. Moment. Are you conscious of just how precious and rare your individual life is? Every minute distinction one could make that is relative to this finite form of Shaun is sacred. So even if we are other people, it means nothing at all because right now the perspective of our finite self is the only perspective possible until physical death. There is something special about the culmination of your experiences. Your life is literally infinite but is also literally finite. That finitude must be seen for what is is, but this is done though a deep, reverence and gratitude for what is so, as it is right now. 

And everyone has this. We are one infinity, but we are also finite by design. The relationship you have with your ego is the same in nature as your relationship to other people’s egos. So try to see this infinity of individuality within yourself, and other’s. That’s how I see it anyway.

 

 

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24 minutes ago, Shaun said:

How is it you cope with this, Leo? How can you accept that you will go back and forth between intense suffering and joy for all of eternity?

I find it very cool. Why would you want to live in a static physical reality? That's so boring.

The weirder and more twisted reality is, the more I love it.

Reality must be the dream of a genius madman. And so it is! How else could it exist? Someone has to dream it up.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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24 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

I find it very cool. Why would you want to live in a static physical reality? That's so boring.

The weirder and more twisted reality is, the more I love it.

Reality must be the dream of a genius madman. And so it is! How else could it exist? Someone has to dream it up.

In the static physical reality I once thought was real, everything mattered deeply. I was creative and full of love and joy. You only got one shot at it so it made sense to live life in such a way that would benefit others and the environment. Now, I have literally seen that it's all just an illusion. When I die, everything will just be wiped clean and I'll start again in some other form. That is tragic and terrifying.


“Words are like Leaves; And where they most abound, Much Fruit of Sense beneath is rarely found.”

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@Shaun Lol, no! The static world you used to live in was miserable and full of fear. Now that you see it's all an illusion you can love it all to the hilt and be joyful because you have absolutely nothing to lose.

You need to go deeper. Your ego is misconstruing things, projecting its own problems on it.

1 trip is nothin', just peanuts.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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41 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

@Shaun Lol, no! The static world you used to live in was miserable and full of fear. Now that you see it's all an illusion you can love it all to the hilt and be joyful because you have absolutely nothing to lose.

You need to go deeper. Your ego is misconstruing things, projecting its own problems on it.

1 trip is nothin', just peanuts.

I will go deeper when I get my strength back. Leo, I just hope you are real in some way. Same for all of you. I want to help others to wake up too but who else is there to help? Should I help others? 

Edited by Shaun

“Words are like Leaves; And where they most abound, Much Fruit of Sense beneath is rarely found.”

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2 minutes ago, Shaun said:

Leo, I just hope you are real in some way. Same for all of you.

Ahahahahaha.... :D

I am as real as you imagine me to be.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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1 minute ago, Leo Gura said:

Ahahahahaha.... :D

I am as real as you imagine me to be.

It still begs the question though, should I help others to awaken? You are doing it so there must be something I am missing. 


“Words are like Leaves; And where they most abound, Much Fruit of Sense beneath is rarely found.”

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7 minutes ago, Shaun said:

It still begs the question though, should I help others to awaken? You are doing it so there must be something I am missing. 

It's quite the paradox.

When I am fully conscious, there is no one left to awaken. All my work is self-entertainment.

When you fully awake you will realize there isn't anyone here but you. But you will also quickly drop back down into conventional reality and treat other people as if they are real and objective. You can't really help it. It's just practical and works for purposes of survival.


You are God. You are Truth. You are Love. You are Infinity.

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9 hours ago, Leo Gura said:

 

God is all alone.

 

God is also the many of the One.

God in never alone for God has invented many imaginary friends including itself.

God is smart in that it's like Q off of startrek... God is everywhere and every thing, not entirely alone. 

Conceptually speaking.. in an attachment sort of way, I the detatched am attached to my imaginary detached attachments. Aka the absurd notion of oneness all alone. . no tripping necessary, it's a mindfucking trip just thinking about all this ...can all be done while remaining sober...don't forget to remember that Leo...God is not a tripper....God is as clear as clarity itself, no belief necessary. :D

Edited by Umar_uk

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31 minutes ago, Leo Gura said:

But you will also quickly drop back down into conventional reality and treat other people as if they are real and objective. You can't really help it. It's just practical and works for purposes of survival.

No, it works for purposes of ego entertainment. . aka conventional mental activity.

 

The reality of  survival instinct is automatic, it's doesn't require any mental imput. For who is there to survive but a mentally constructed idea for my entertainment only?

 

 

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4 hours ago, Umar_uk said:

God is also the many of the One.

God in never alone for God has invented many imaginary friends including itself.

God is smart in that it's like Q off of startrek... God is everywhere and every thing, not entirely alone. 

Conceptually speaking.. in an attachment sort of way, I the detatched am attached to my imaginary detached attachments. Aka the absurd notion of oneness all alone. . no tripping necessary, it's a mindfucking trip just thinking about all this ...can all be done while remaining sober...don't forget to remember that Leo...God is not a tripper....God is as clear as clarity itself, no belief necessary. :D

I think this makes more sense. Just now we are in the world of self and other but through meditation and psychedelics, a mystical shift to yourself as god is possible. Leo can't seem to make up his mind, in one video he goes on about each of us being like probes which god sends down into itself so it can know itself and the next minute, I Shaun am god and all of you guys are just illusions.


“Words are like Leaves; And where they most abound, Much Fruit of Sense beneath is rarely found.”

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