Commodent

How to make a realistic plan for living the life that you want?

13 posts in this topic

Hello,

I am currently attending a Computer Science course which is an integrated master’s (5 years). I am now reaching the end of the second year.

I have always enjoyed programming and the endless opportunities it offers. I was about 13 when I decided to attend this course, and I worked hard for years in order to get in. But I feel like my interests have shifted. I no longer want to stare at a screen “solving puzzles”, ultimately ending up in a career making products I don’t care about for corporations I don’t care about either. I want to do something truly meaningful, like helping people becoming whole, or doing something really creative. Like making music, art or maybe writing a novel. I also want to spend more time connecting deeply with others, and I want to be more in nature.

But most of all, I feel like I have so much to share that could be helpful to so many people, and it almost feels selfish keeping it to myself. Because it has helped me so much. I have spent so much of my life reflecting, researching and most importantly, applying that knowledge to myself in order to heal my inner wounds. I feel like I have come so far in this work that the time has come to extend this gift to other people.

I feel it very strongly now. I still enjoy programming and by following this career path I’m almost guaranteed a well-paying job, but that is not really where my heart is at. So, I am wondering, what now? I want to dedicate my time fully to creative pursuits and helping others, but still, I need to make a living somehow. And I’m not sure how I would go about doing that. I want to do lots of different things; make art, make music, write a novel and write self-help.  And thus, I also feel like I need some time to discover exactly where I'm going to place my focus. I have enough money in my bank account to live comfortably for two years (maybe three) without any income, so maybe I should just take a year off to learn and try different things, and see what works out? Or maybe I should just half-ass my way through the remaining three years of the Computer Science course while pursuing my passions in the spare time? That’s the safest option, at least. I have also considered switching to “Industrial Economics and Technology Management”, which is an engineering course that combines both IT and business. I’m less interested in economics/business than IT, but I figure that it might be useful in making a living out of what I want to do. And if that idea weren't going to work out, I’d still have the most sought-after education in my country.

Long story short, I am very aware of the direction I want to go, but I don’t have any concrete plan. Just ideas. So, I wondered if you could offer any advice? Given my current situation, how could I go about actualizing my vision? Are there any realistic ways?

Thank you


I am myself, heaven and hell.

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@Commodent You got lucky man! At a young age, you realized that the path you're currently on is not going to be fulfilling enough. Most people have a mid-life crisis and 2 heart attacks to get there :)

Getting your degree could be important if you want to get a job in engineering or working for someone else. But if you want to help others, you have to get a little more specific. Are you thinking more of therapy sessions, or one-on-one personal development sessions? What type of personal development would you focus on, and how can you advertise and market for that? What I'm saying is, if you want to start your own business in the field of personal development or artwork, a degree is probably not a necessity.

A few questions: Can you really live for 2 years without any income? During that time you can work your tail off and create the foundations and groundwork for your personal development/therapy/whatever-you-want-to-call-it business. Could you simply switch your major to psychology or philosophy? That would lessen the burden of deciding what you should be doing right now, and give you a few years to study and gain knowledge while contemplating what your next professional moves are. What are your financial goals for the next few years? If you want to live a minimalist lifestyle, you can take on very different work compared to if you wanted to own a mansion and Lamborghini. 

I think the most important question you should ask yourself is: What kind of work and job will challenge you and help you grow and learn in the direction you want to improve?

Hope this helps!

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@Commodent You can do it all and still finish your CS course. It's just a matter of time management.

Computer Science gives you a powerful set of tools to do a lot of things in your life. I am a computer scientist myself... I got my master's degree in 2018 in Artificial Intelligence. If you want to talk about the depths of CS on how it can help a LOT of people or talk about time management, feel free do do it here or just send me a PM.

Good luck!


unborn Truth

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Every kind job is a struggle in some way, and you will face countless difficulties even if you're doing your 'purest' passion. 

Anyway there is always a way, and you can succeed only if face it in a pro mode. 

1) Make sure your work is going to be valuable in the real world, so aim to make it world class quality. But also world class unique. 

2) Make a concrete plan, pick one big goal. Then slice it into quarters, then slice them again until you have actionable things to do. Then do one thing at time, with extreme focus and forget temporarily the next things to do. Every once in a while take an off time to review your plan, but try to stick with it.

3) Learn constantly, your field is important but don't forget accessories things. Like marketing.

 

 

*For the first point, i suggest to read Cal Newport works, but also this article is truly valuable to be a unique creator: https://www.nateliason.com/notes/cook-chef-musks-secret-sauce

*For the second point, i suggest to use software for task management. There are plenty of them. But i recently use AirTable, is a powerful app and very versatile. An article about that: https://www.nateliason.com/blog/airtable-goals (I recently heard that Elon Musk uses it lol)

*For the third point, i suggested "marketing" not only to sell better your product, but also to shape better your product in the first place. But every field of knowledge is a goldmine.

 

Hope it helped!

 

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Thanks for the replies. It's been a hectic week with exams and such so I haven't had the time to reply until now.

@Wyatt Thank you. I have thought that helping other people in one-on-one therapy sessions would be a good fit for me. However, in order to get licensed I would have to enter a 6 year study programme, which is a problem. I generally don't subscribe to what they teach in the clinical psychology courses and I think it's just a huge waste of time.

I can live for at least 2 years without income yes. If I were to do so I would just need a good plan first, so that I don't end up spending all that time and money for nothing. I have never been a big spender, and I strive for minimalism both in my environment and in my actions. So I don't have any lofty goals. I feel like the ideal thing would be to create something that generates a passive income, so that I can spend my time doing the things I want without the pressure of having to earn money.

I am thinking of maybe writing a book, I think that would be really fun. I'm thinking of spending this summer writing lots of short stories in order to brush up my writing skills.

@ajasatya Yeah, there's a good chance I'll just do it alongside of the CS course. I think AI is very exciting and I've chosen that as a specialization for the remaining three years. You work with AI, no? What is it like working with that?

@Kubia Thank you for the useful advice, it helps a lot. I loved Cal Newport's book "Digital Minimalism", and I'm going to read his book "So Good They Can't Ignore You" which someone else in here recommended.


I am myself, heaven and hell.

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Hello mate.

From our chats it’s obvious to me that you would be an incredible teacher in the field somewhere. Whether that’s as an author, a therapist, a psychologist, a life coach. Whatever it may be. Time is on your side to explore and find your purpose.

I’d recommend the book ‘shapeshifter’ by geoff thompson. 

He’s a guy i recommend for a lot of things, and typically i advise that people understand his life story first, possibly by reading his autobiography ‘watch my back’ or by researching him. Reason being that understanding that context makes his work much more powerful.

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@studentofthegame  Hey mate :)

You are partly what inspired me to seriously consider this route, so firstly I'd like to say thank you for that.

Yes, luckily time is on my side. I think I'll start with writing, as that is more immediately accessible. If I were to do therapy of some sorts I feel like I would need at least a degree in psychology or something for credentials.

Ah, I remember you mentioned him. I have added "Shape shifter" to my reading list, thank you. :)


I am myself, heaven and hell.

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Commodent,

I can speak from personal experience.  After 7 years of professional training and 3 years in the field, I became burnt out and dispassionate with my career.  I came very (I repeat, very) close to completely dismissing my career choice and starting over.  I was extremely fortunate to accidentally stumble into a niche area of my profession that provided the exact challenge and both professional and personal satisfaction that I desired.  I can honestly say now that I absolutely LOVE my career.  I continue to be enthusiastic, passionate and grateful to come to work everyday to do what I do (I even moved my family to another country to pursue advanced training within this niche subfield).  This is possible for you.

Although I am understand I am projecting my experience on you, I would encourage you to explore ways of continuing your current education pathway and finding a way to integrate both your interest in computer science and your passion for helping people? One where you utilize (and optimize) your current training to create a professionally and personally satisfying career where you help people.  

I am not familiar with the computer science field so I will struggle to find realistic examples or suggestions, but is it possible that you can leverage your professional training for this?

Just to brainstorm: 

- Create a career-guidance service for young and aspiring computer science students

- Create a career-guidance service for people within computer science that become dissatisfied with their careers and reinvigorate/redirect them to optimize their career training to an area that better serves them

- Become a writer/photographer/journalist for computer science topics

- Work for companies or take contracts only that are aligned with your interests/visions

- Become a computer science instructor and integrate personal development within your lectures (or create a personal development club for those students interested).

- Become a computer science instructor and allow your progress within personal development permeate your students through experience and example

- Create games for kids to play that generate interest in computer science: and help build esteem, confidence, ability to work independently and as a team.  All critical fundamental personal development tools.  

I have said this on this forum 100-times, and I will continue to say it 100 more times.  The personal development coach has SIGNIFICANTLY more cache and ability to generate revenue if they have experience and success in the field that they are targeting.  As Leo says, you need to create massive value for your audience/clients.  To me, with few exceptions, I would be 1000X more likely to pay a personal development/career coach if they had experience/success in my field, than I would be to pay somebody whose resume only had "personal development coach".  

Maybe computer science isn't for you... but damn, it sounds like you have put a lot of sweat equity into this.  It sounds like you have other interests that are pulling you away, but it always sounds like you are still passionate about computer science.  

I'd try to find something nontraditional within your field man.  My 2 cents.  Best of luck as you navigate the next few years.  No disrespect intended for the personal development coaches out there.  

 

 

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5 hours ago, Commodent said:

You work with AI, no? What is it like working with that?

It's amazing. The hardest part is becoming part of some challenging project that's financially viable. But you can start working on that from today. Build an interesting portfolio (Github page/repos, Kaggle competitions/kernels etc) and things should go a lot smoother for you in the near future.

For me, working with AI = creativity + mathematics. It gives me the feeling that I'm working at my peak.


unborn Truth

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@Commodent

good stuff man.

As for finishing the computer science degree, I tend to agree with others that seeing that through and closing that chapter feels like the proper advice to give. But that is for you to contemplate. 

Another 3 years is a long time to commit to something that your heart and head is no longer in. On the other hand, if you can draw up a list of the benefits of finishing the course, how you can explore other passions around it during the 3 years, possibly the discipline it will help to build by staying the course, you might feel it's the right thing to do. 

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@exhale  Thank you. You have lots of good ideas, but the thing is that I very much want to help people work through serious emotional problems (which, to be fair, we all have), rather than helping people land their next job etc. I apologize for not making that clear enough. I have found that I on multiple occasions have been able to help those who have been to several psychologists and have been deemed "treatment resistant", maybe because I was such a case myself. Just yesterday several people on another forum wanted to know who I was and assumed I must be a therapist when I gave my advice to someone struggling with self-loathing. So I definitely feel like I have something valuable to offer in this realm, although I don't have the credentials.

I have thought of combining therapy and CS, but as stated I'm not really interested in "mere" coaching. I want to go much deeper than that. So, how does one go about helping people heal their deepest inner wounds, while at the same time applying my CS knowledge? That just sounds extremely, extremely niche to me, and I'm yet to find a path combining those two.

@ajasatya I'm glad to hear that. I'm going to learn lots about AI over the next three years and I'm very excited about that, although I have heard it's pretty dense material. The potential for AI is just astounding. Do you feel like you get to innovate and come up with new solutions? I just wondered since I have heard lots of AI work just involves using models someone else have made and pruning datasets. But I guess that depends on the job.

@studentofthegame Yes, I think I will finish the remaining 3 years. I honestly didn't expect to get into the AI specialization because my grades are kinda mediocre, but I got in. So now I'm a lot more excited about the CS course because I get to learn about stuff I find super fascinating. So yeah, I definitely feel like I'm getting pulled in both directions now. On the one hand AI is very fascinating, while on the other hand I feel like I could be able to help people in a much deeper and more meaningful way if I were to go the author / therapist route. With the latter I feel like I could actually offer something truly valuable to the world.


I am myself, heaven and hell.

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2 hours ago, Commodent said:

Do you feel like you get to innovate and come up with new solutions?

It's inevitable. Specially in new fields/services.

2 hours ago, Commodent said:

I have heard lots of AI work just involves using models someone else have made and pruning datasets. But I guess that depends on the job.

It depends on the job. Particularly, I am a Data Scientist, so my work is to analyse datasets and design statistical models. But there are also Data Engineers, who are responsible to ensure the data quality. And there are the Machine Learning Engineers, who plug models designed by Data Scientists in production.


unborn Truth

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