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Preety_India

Priti Health Journal

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Chapter 31 

Need to read the book the healing self 

Edited by Preety_India

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BChapter 32

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God is like a force.  God is an instinct. A feeling. Intangible. A sense like the sixth sense. 

God is nature. Not entity. 

God is the voice of conscience.

God is like a judge, like the balance held by the lady of justice. God does not have an animated form because it's more like a quality, a sense, a perception. 

God is like a mirror that shows right from wrong. That stands with justice. That speaks  the truth and admires honesty. That shows righteousness. It cares. It has empathy and only wants good for everyone, not someone particular hence it is impartial and hence it considers everyone equal. It is like a judge. The judge is not your personal friend or companion, but he wants good for you, wishes you well, and does justice to you, is impartial and supports you only when you are right but not when you are wrong and tells you the truth. But a fanatic or comrade is different.  a supporter, accomplice or fanatic is someone who is always along with you all the time and supports you in everything that you do, both right or wrong. They are like blind followers, sometimes even enablers in something bad that you do.. However God uses discernment and proper judgment. That's a godly quality. 

There has to be a part in the brain and  I will call it the God part.. The God part in the brain. The part that perceives the feeling of God or God's existence. Now there are 2 groups of people. One who believe that God exists because it's their general belief that makes them feel secure and good. The other group that a actually feels the feeling of God or they can feel God or God force [Godforce is a better term than God because it takes the focus away from the entity or idol and places it on the nature or quality.] so the other group actually feels the Godforce within them. They feel guided or they feel protected. The parts in their brains, the God parts are more sensitive to emotions and conscience and these parts are easily activated. The sense in then is strong. Such people are generally empaths. 

Three things that many people who feel this way claim to experience, not that this is a proof of God's existence but it is a feeling that people experience. Maybe God is a phenomenon, an event, a form that suddenly exists during a state, a response created by our consciousness. Maybe God is like a phenomenon like an allergic response. And we get to experience this phenomenon sometimes but not all the time. These experiences enrich our life and survival. These experiences happen sometimes and when we get glimpses of such phenomenon we feel connected to the Godness or Godnature or Godforce. This can be called as periods of blessing or "grace" or "divination" where we get protection or grace or guidance from a supernatural source that is not human. Such phenomenon can be called God phenomenon or divination glimpses.. Maybe such phenomenon arise from our own brains or Subconscious mind but one thing is sure that these phenomenon happen and they are mysterious but they leave us with a sense of peace. 

1. Feeling like they are being protected from harm [from others] and danger [from non living objects or events] 

2. Feeling like something guides them. Like intuition. Like inner guidance. Premonition. Instinct. 

3. Feeling like they are being sustained or helped to survive and live. Taken care of or looked after. This is commonly described in many religions and by many people as "living in God's grace" 

 

There is nothing like good or evil. Or devil. Or Satan. Only destructive behavior. Pro and anti personalities. Anti social behavior. Incompatibility. Destructive personality. 

There is no demon.. 

It's only destructive personality. Sociopathic personality or behavior. 

It occurs in stages. First there is non resonant personality. It is devoid of emotion or empathy. This is not malignant. It is nascent. It is just born. When it begins to attract destructive sociopathic elements that's when it begins to behave and act on these impulses that's when it becomes a full fledged destructive device or structure or person. 

 

The theory of 3 pyramid blocks. 

Imagine 3 pyramid blocks. One is clear, fully transparent. The other is translucent or semi transparent. . The last is fully opaque. Let's say it's made of thick absorbing opaque sponge. . The first represents a good conscience, a solid conscience where a person is caring, understanding and has good intentions. He will never harm. He does good. His conscience is strong. This pyramid is resonant. It allows gods voice to be heard and accepted. It allows the conscience to permeate and guide the path. It allows light. It relies on the conscience. Any negative impulses and sociopathic tendencies are quickly deflected. If water falls on this, the water slides away or slips away and drips. The crystal block doesn't absorb but deflects or evades the water. The water represents dark  impulses and instincts. The clear transparent nature of this block represents a clear guilt free conscience. 

The second block which is an opaque sponge is bad conscience or no conscience. Absence of God like qualities. This is non resonant or incompatible. It does not let light pass through it. It blocks light. It's not transparent. It has a guilty conscience. It blocks the voice of truth and shuns the light of wisdom and guidance. So when water which is bad or dark impulses or sociopathic environmental stimuli falls on it in the form of water droplets, it  gets absorbed. When it's very heavy with water it turns into a time bomb ready to go off and becomes destructive. Thus there is no evil or devil or Satan or demon. The thing itself turns into a devil in itself. I will call this destructive element. Until now it was an empty sponge. Now it has been morphed into a destructive element as a result of the expression of dark impulses. This element will now try to act on those impulses and bring destruction of innocence. It is rightly said the empty mind is the devil's workshop. Because bad thoughts occupy the place where no light or wisdom can enter. 

The last pyramid block is the semi transparent one. It allows some light. It is neutral. It is neither good nor harmful. It does not harm anyone. But it also doesn't do good. It doesn't fight to create good or defeat bad. It's like a spectator. But it doesn't bring any benefit. It's good but not admirable. It does not help or contribute in prevailing good. 

In our nature we would try to be more like the first block, good in our conscience, create good and deflect bad. It also means that those who are destructive need reform and help, helping them to feel empathy and understand their harmful nature rather than wanting them to suffer in hell. 

A pro personality is resonant and mimics the qualities of the first block. An anti personality mimics the qualities of the second block. 

An anti personality remains dormant when it's not exposed and or is under influence, control and fear and pressure. Once these barriers are lifted, there is no fear or control or pressure, and enough exposure to destructive impulses causes an anti personality to eventually turn into a destructive element. 

God like qualities or God nature 

Justice   gentleness 

Calm

Righteous  

Truth and honesty 

Goodness  protectiveness 

Caring and Empathy 

Wise and guiding. 

Understanding and prudent 

Not coddling. 

 

Example of 2 friends one is right and the other is fanatic 

Let's say a man has 2 friends. Both are good friends. Both are loyal. The first friend however is a follower fanboy type. Very fanatic. He is like a partner or companion. So whatever the man says, he does without resistance or question. He blindly follows instruction and has a zealous attachment like a fan. So if the man plans to commit a crime, he helps the man and does his part. The other one is wiser and neutral. He questions if he finds anything suspicious. He hesitates when realizes if something is immoral. This one represents God nature. He wishes well and is caring but he won't support something bad. He will confront the man with the truth and only do that which is right. God is not going to be affectionate or coddle you. Though he does want the best for you. 

 

And the last concept is there is nothing like hell. You create good outcome or bad outcome by your own karma. 

 

The only thing that possibly describes heaven is the feeling of peace when being united with the feeling of God inside. Not God itself. But feeling like being  united or being one with that protective instinct or protective force. 

[ the bad ones inflict or provoke, the good ones endure] 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Chapter 35 

 

Divination process 

Divination guidance box and divination Rituals. 

  1. Connect with the voice of the conscience. Write down what it says. This tells you about righteousness. 
  2. Connect with the wisdom of God/sol. Write what this wisdom guides to do. Move the pendulum to get divination wisdom. 
  3. Talk to the scrying mirror. What truth does it reveal about you. This will need shadow work. 
  4. Water bottle. What negative impulses tempt you now.

Keep the notes in the divination guidance box. 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Ch. 

Three focus points 

Divination and mentalism and inner relationship with God

Edited by Preety_India

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Chapter 36

 

 mentalism project. 

Power of belief or placebo

Power of intention 

Power of law of attraction 

Power of intention 

Power of mental state

Power of suggestion 

Power of connection to inner self 

Power of loving care 

Oxygen, water and iron required for cells. 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Chapter 37

Both sociopathic and psychopathic tendencies are present in varying degrees in every person. 

You have to look for traits which indicate both sociopathic and psychopathic tendencies in every person you observe. 

Key elements to observe include

Body language and facial expressions 

Words spoken or written. The meaning of the sentences. What is implied shows the thought process of the person. It's like a decoding technique. 

People who show lower scores on both sociopath and psychopathy are less of a threat. People who show higher scores are going to hurt directly or indirectly. 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Chapter 38 

Where do you see and find God. 

God is found in deepest darkest most silent moments. Most serious most aware. 

The words or phrase in weakness you find strength makes a lot of sense. 

In weakness, you try to find strength. You find this strength through God. That's where you find God. 

In darkness you try to bring light. That's where you find God. 

It seems like those who suffer more are closer to God. Because in suffering the soul craves or yearns for freedom. That's when it wants to come closer to God because being close to God symbolizes freedom. 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Chapter 39

Empathy represents growth and love. Care. Psychopathy represents greed. Sociopathy represents sadism. 

Where do we invoke God 

Traditionally, the seven Christian virtues or heavenly virtues combine the four classical cardinal virtues ofprudence, justice, temperance andcourage (or fortitude) with the three theological virtues of faith, hope andcharity.

We invoke God in hope, silence, faith, courage, love, peace, goodness, empathy, kindness and positivity and wisdom. 

So the cultivation of following qualities are necessary to feel the presence of God or invoke God or he closer to God apart from practices of prayer, meditation, reflection, and divination. 

The qualities are -

Silence 

Faith 

Hope 

Charity or generosity 

Empathy 

Kindness and mercy 

Forgiveness 

Peace 

Goodness and abundance

Grace humility and acceptance 

Courage 

Love

Wisdom 

Gratitude 

Positivity 

 

 

 

 

Therefore people who show these qualities or traits or emotions in them appear more deep or spiritual because through these qualities they constantly experience closeness to God. These are not enough. The regular practices of prayer and inner self connection are equally important. 

Special mention of the word grace. 

 

What it means to have grace?

It means going beyond your inclinations of trying to get the upper hand or revenge on someone who hurt you. Having grace in your heart and soul is choosing to be the bigger person. It does not mean forgiveness but acceptance that someone is choosing to do wrong but you will not choose to do wrong. You will stick to your decency even if the other did bad. You will be humble and carry on and accept defeat because it's better to accept defeat than take revenge. 

The other meaning of grace is to live in simplicity and humility and by God's will. Not considering yourself to be all powerful but rather surrendering to God's power and living in his favor, living in his grace and relying or trusting that God will take care of your needs and you will be provided for by his grace or favor. 

The difference between trust, faith and hope. 

Trust is built over time and exists because the past record has helped develop trust and so there is no room for doubt. Trust is broken only when there is deception. Trust is with a specific person or relationship. 

Trust is not blind and comes with logical reasoning and questioning when troubled with doubt. So trust is built through realization and rationality. You trust because you saw. You trust because you know. You trust because it has always been this way. So it's rational to believe that it will always be this way. 

Faith is blind. It is not based on logic or rationality. You believe without proof of a previous record or evidence. You don't need anything to believe. You have a firm belief that it is always good and that your faith will never be contradicted or shattered. You do not challenge your faith, you simply believe wholeheartedly. Faith is for both the present and the future. 

Despite dissatisfaction and disappointment faith holds on and hangs on. The disappointment is a test of faith itself. It is supposed that faith wins in the end. It's a quality that has to endure over time to prove that having faith was worth it. 

Faith breaks in exceptional circumstances when there is continual defeat of hope or only when something happens that is extremely contradictory or unbelievable. 

Hope is for the future. This is anticipation that things will be good. It is not based on trust but based in faith. It is based on the premise that the outcome wil be good if you hope for a good outcome. However it does not mean that bad things won't happen. It only means to have a positive outlook even in the face of uncertainty. It's like having a positive attitude is better than a negative attitude. 

Edited by Preety_India

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Chapter 40

Divination focuses on 4 qualities of God. 

They are 

1. Truth and honesty ..... Mirror 

2. Wisdom.  Pendulum 

3.Righteousness. .   A spiral on a rectangle. Conscience 

4. Love... A rosary bead or just a beaded chain or necklace string of beads. Scroll this string between the fingers as you chant to yourself that God loves you are cares about you. 

 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Chapter 41

5 symbols 

Mirror 

Water bottle 

Pendulum 

Spiral on rectangle 

Beaded chain 

 

Edited by Preety_India

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Chapter 42


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Chapter 43 


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Chapter 42 

3 concepts 

1. If I wasn't so hungry for affection I wouldn't been so needy. This neediness is not fake. Rather it's a sign of a deeper hunger due to lack or deprivation at early stages in life. This deeper need was never fulfilled even once as a result there is a gaping void that is left that was never fulfilled that in turn gave birth to extreme emotions, feelings of inadequacies, insecurity and low self esteem and lack of trust in others. Leading to hyper vigilance and hostile defensive behavior. Also causing moodiness and low motivation. Never felt motivated enough to do something for someone else. To live for others. That maturity never came. There is a huge difference between attention seeking Narcissism and deep hunger for love.. In hunger real help is needed. Its like saying to a homeless person seeking a home, "you are being very selfish." this is very abusive. 

And there was nothing to compare to. No positive emotional state to compare to. Nothing to draw from. No earlier or previous boost for self esteem to rely on or draw from. 

2. Projection of character. 

 

If a person does not try to put effort to understand you better and make you to be something you are not and project your character to be something it's not, and this is consistently happening and despite you requesting them that's its just their misunderstanding, they still do not believe you, then such people are only going to hurt you more down the line. It's best to avoid them because eventually they will only shate and disagreement. Those misunderstandings are never going to be resolved no matter how much you hope for it. And such people are eventually going to prove to be toxic to you. Therefore you should avoid them and they should not have a place in your life especially when you did nothing wrong and they are still misunderstanding you. Their misunderstanding means they don't deserve you, because you don't deserve people who misunderstand you despite claiming they love  you. You deserve people who understand you.

 

4 qualities of people who love you. 

1. They care about every little thing about you 

2. They have deeper communications with you 

3. They fight and get angry and upset and possessive about you. 

4. They do not want fights with you. So they believe you 

5. Let go. 

 

 

 

 

 

When someone tries to project your character in a certain way then they are either causing huge misunderstanding or they are doing this on purpose because they don't want to put the effort in understanding you. They just don't want to be on the positive side of you or think positive about you. This I will refer to as either lack of understanding by mistake or on purpose, when it's on purpose for narcissistic self serving goals then I will call it projection of character. If someone is trying to project your character in a way which is not even remotely close to who you are then they are covertly demonizing you. This is a covert attack or covert bullying. In  such a case, this person does not deserve to be in your life as your friend/partner for the simple reason that the person who truly loves you will try to understand you in the best possible way, mostly in a positive affirmative way unless you are showing very abnormal behaviors where it's difficult for them to support you, otherwise they will mostly be supportive of you and they will try to resolve any misunderstandings and they will know you for who you truly are. This line is golden. The person who loves you knows you best, that is, they know you for who you truly are, and you know yourself better, you know who you are and how you feel so there should not be much difference between what person thinks you are and what you think you are. If there is a huge difference then it means either there is a true misunderstanding or they are trying to judge you on purpose mostly to serve their own goals. But love is sorta intuitive. So eventually at some point the misunderstanding will resolve as the person tries to live you more and know more about you, 

 

Narcissistic Behavior article excerpts 

Calling you things that you are not

A classic example, “You’re cheating on me,” when you are not, but you can bet they’re cheating on you.

Or, “You’re selfish because you don’t want to do what I am asking you to do. You only think about yourself.” Meanwhile they are the ones who constantly make up excuses, break promises, are unreliable, think only about themselves, or compete with you. Not only that, they will forget all the things that you have already done for them.

2. Projection.

One sure sign of toxicity is when a person is chronically unwilling to see his or her own shortcomings and uses everything in their power to avoid being held accountable for them. This is known as projection. Projection is a defense mechanism used to displace responsibility of one’s negative behavior and traits by attributing them to someone else. It ultimately acts as a digression that avoids ownership and accountability.

While we all engage in projection to some extent, according to Narcissistic Personality clinical expert Dr. Martinez-Lewi, the projections of a narcissist are often psychologically abusive. Rather than acknowledge their own flaws, imperfections and wrongdoings, malignant narcissists and sociopaths opt to dump their own traits on their unsuspecting suspects in a way that is painful and excessively cruel. Instead of admitting that self-improvement may be in order, they would prefer that their victims take responsibility for their behavior and feel ashamed of themselves. This is a way for a narcissist to project any toxic shame they have about themselves onto another.

For example, a person who engages in pathological lying may accuse their partner of fibbing; a needy spouse may call their husband “clingy” in an attempt to depict them as the one who is dependent; a rude employee may call their boss ineffective in an effort to escape the truth about their own productivity.

Narcissistic abusers love to play the “blameshifting game.” Objectives of the game: they win, you lose, and you or the world at large is blamed for everything that’s wrong with them. This way, you get to babysit their fragile ego while you’re thrust into a sea of self-doubt.

Edited by Preety_India

INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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Chapter 43


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Chapter 43 


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Chapter 44


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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44 minutes ago, Speedscarlet said:

@Preety_India I’m surprised that you can be doing personal development in India. Do you have enough food to survive? Is your house about to collapse? ?????

Dude, enough with your offensive comments.


"Not believing your own thoughts, you’re free from the primal desire: the thought that reality should be different than it is. You realise the wordless, the unthinkable. You understand that any mystery is only what you yourself have created. In fact, there’s no mystery. Everything is as clear as day. It’s simple, because there really isn’t anything. There’s only the story appearing now. And not even that.” — Byron Katie

 

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2 hours ago, Speedscarlet said:

@Preety_India I’m surprised that you can be doing personal development in India. Do you have enough food to survive? Is your house about to collapse? ?????

Did you get your high? Happy? 

This world is not as  much a sad place without food or a home as it is with people like you. 

You are a cyber bully. 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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Chapter 45

 


INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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16th October 

I'm depressed. I'm trying to heal. Today is a bad day. 

Edited by Preety_India

INFJ-T,ptsd,BPD, autism, anger issues

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