BjarkeT

How to finish what you started

8 posts in this topic

Posted (edited)

Would be really useful with a video on this. Without this skill you can't really do any personal development.

something called loss aversion may be useful to use as a technique to finish what one started.

some other ideas:

delayed gratification.

grit.

habits and routines.

Edited by BjarkeT

*Destiny is a gift. Some go their entire lives, living existence as a quiet desperation. Never learning the truth that what feels as though a burden pushing down upon our shoulders, is actually, a sense of purpose that lifts us to greater heights. Never forget that fear is but the precursor to valour, that to strive and triumph in the face of fear, is what it means to be a hero* Quoted from the Troll hunters tv serie

“A sign of wisdom and maturity is when you come to terms with the realization that your decisions cause your rewards and consequences. You are responsible for your life, and your ultimate success depends on the choices you make.”
Denis Waitley

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Posted (edited)

@BjarkeT look up kylo ren. you're welcome.

Edited by Timothy

"Smile, because it confuses people. Smile, because it’s easier than explaining what is killing you inside." - The Joker – Heath Ledger

"Yesterday's truth is today's bullshit. Even yesterday's liberating insight is today's jail of stale explanation." - Brad Blanton

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Posted (edited)

@Timothy what have star wars to do with this? I already seen the movie but not sure how its supposed to help with this.

When i search for hes name nothing related to this comes up so i am a bit confused. 

It seems a bit unrelated. 

Edited by BjarkeT

*Destiny is a gift. Some go their entire lives, living existence as a quiet desperation. Never learning the truth that what feels as though a burden pushing down upon our shoulders, is actually, a sense of purpose that lifts us to greater heights. Never forget that fear is but the precursor to valour, that to strive and triumph in the face of fear, is what it means to be a hero* Quoted from the Troll hunters tv serie

“A sign of wisdom and maturity is when you come to terms with the realization that your decisions cause your rewards and consequences. You are responsible for your life, and your ultimate success depends on the choices you make.”
Denis Waitley

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Contemplate  And visualize the importance of finish of projects  and the consenqueces on ones life  ! 

Or try the pre morten technique to avoid project failure   , Leo has a vídeo about this 

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@BjarkeT haha sorry to mislead you I was just kidding. 

But here I'll actually contribute. I'm a musician so I've started and also not finished many music projects. I have a decent personal recording studio also so it's a lot of fun. 

I attended the Peter Ralston retreat and learned so much. One thing I learned was staying on purpose. Which can also mean: why am I actually doing something? What's the actual purpose of this endeavour I'm engaging in? And this also ties into authentic behaviors and desires. 

Is this endeavour I'm doing a manipulation to get something out of it? Attention, fame, trying to prove a point etc. Am I trying to suck things out of people that I want? Or am I actually contributing? 

I was working on an album. Told people I was gonna release it, and do a big release party. After I attended the retreat, I cancelled the album a few months later. Only completed about 4 songs. 

I actually wasnt event that passionate about this particular music I was making. I was trying to be this big front man like John Mayer or someone. It was mostly for the attention. And I cant maintain that image of myself because I know I'm actually insecure so I have to stay true to that, and of course dig in even more to get underneath. 

Of course I was also looking forward to gaining recording skills and singing skills on this project, but those were secondary motives. 

I actually really like beautiful, emotional and even feminine music that makes me cry and experience a whole range of emotions! And my music was trying to be cool and badass which was a misalignment. 

So I cancelled the project. I'm very happy with my choice. Now I work on music I actually love and it's way easier to complete a music project because it's on a more authentic level of what I love, and that makes it more contributive rather than value taking.

Some might think that it's out of integrity to tell people that I'm gonna do something then not do it. In my case I'm so happy I dropped this project. If something done is on a flawed purpose that doesn't give you joy, help people, and show love and beauty, then you have every right to drop it and never complete it. Selfish endeavours dont deserve my completion. There's so much garbage put out in the world that I don't want to add on to any of it. I'd rather spend my whole life time trying to create something truly beautiful and not putting it out there, than having something decent and getting it well recognized. That's where I'm at.

Not sure if you can relate to this but this is my personal experience.


"Smile, because it confuses people. Smile, because it’s easier than explaining what is killing you inside." - The Joker – Heath Ledger

"Yesterday's truth is today's bullshit. Even yesterday's liberating insight is today's jail of stale explanation." - Brad Blanton

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No worries that make sense. Thanks for the infomation:) If I understand it correctly is it to do something authentic to help one being motivated to finish? 


*Destiny is a gift. Some go their entire lives, living existence as a quiet desperation. Never learning the truth that what feels as though a burden pushing down upon our shoulders, is actually, a sense of purpose that lifts us to greater heights. Never forget that fear is but the precursor to valour, that to strive and triumph in the face of fear, is what it means to be a hero* Quoted from the Troll hunters tv serie

“A sign of wisdom and maturity is when you come to terms with the realization that your decisions cause your rewards and consequences. You are responsible for your life, and your ultimate success depends on the choices you make.”
Denis Waitley

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Posted (edited)

Exactly! 

So what Peter Ralston teaches is that authenticity from a relative perspective, exists in different degrees.

So with this music example, you could say that at first, I authentically wanted to make this kind of music. That's all I knew at the time. Then doing lots of contemplation, I saw that the music I was making was trying to construct an image of myself. A big image, a sexy image, a strong and capable image. But why? What is that trying to compensate for?...

Oh I'm insecure. I can feel it through my whole being. I'm using this music as a manipulation to hide this insecurity. Ok good. Now authentically I know I'm insecure, so I go ahead and drop this music. And it wasnt an intellectual realization, I broke down in tears on my retreat and felt how insecure and vulnerable I was. You have to truly feel it. It hurts :/

Anyways, now that I've stopped making music for attention, I focus on music that makes me feel good! Makes me cry and experience love n such. I dont focus on validation, I just care about the beauty (not fully but I'm working towards it). So I've cut out the music that communicates ego, and I listen to music that communicates love and beauty, and amazing vibes. 

So you could now say that I authentically like high purpose music. Great that's way different than before and I actually enjoy doing it! So that may help you. 

......

But how can we take this even deeper? This is where I'm at now. What is this so called "beautiful, high purpose" music trying to do? What is true in my experience that motivates me to pursue this experience of beauty?... 

Oh my God I fundamentally feel empty and unhappy. This is why I'm desperately pursuing a beautiful expericne through music. Now I have an authentic desire to resolve this emptiness. See how this works? 

So instead of listening to music trying to resolve this emptiness, I just focus on the emptiness and now that's my endeavour that I want to complete. Because it's this emptiness motivating all my actions that the actions themselves can never resolve. 

Of course there's a difference between enjoying music and chasing experience through music, but for me, I chase experience all the time. And that's what's hurting me.

So my authentic desire now is to resolve this emptiness and insecurity. I don't see myself every giving up at this because I desperately want to be happy and for now, that's authentic. 

Edited by Timothy

"Smile, because it confuses people. Smile, because it’s easier than explaining what is killing you inside." - The Joker – Heath Ledger

"Yesterday's truth is today's bullshit. Even yesterday's liberating insight is today's jail of stale explanation." - Brad Blanton

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I recommend reading Jordan Peterson's book, 12 Rules For Life, and may that be your final self help book ever.

I also recommend you unsubscribe from Actualized. It only promotes overthinking and nihilism which WON'T help you at all. Trust me, I was brainwashed for two years, too, but I'm free now, and I've never done better in life since I got out of Leo's grasp and read this book.  

This'll either shock you, or you'll dismiss me and tell me to "keep meditating deeper" and "stop critizising" (which is what Leo - the self proclaimed enlightened guy - teaches you to scare off people who genuinely threatens his business). 

https://www.quora.com/Is-Leo-Gura’s-Actualized-org-a-scam

Read the first response to this question carefully, and reconsider whether Actualized is either helping you a lot, or keeping you brainwashed and stuck in a rut (the latter is the case). 

https://www.quora.com/Is-Leo-Gura’s-Actualized-org-a-scam

Why am I here on this forum? To try and save at least one life from this corrupted cult!

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