Joseph Maynor

Do Any Of You Resonate With Any Of These Roles? How Did You Shake Them Off If You Did?

5 posts in this topic

The quitter
the antisocial
The outspoken person
The person who doesn't give a shit
The rule breaker
The weirdo
The arrogant person
The person with low self-esteem
The lone wolf
The nice guy
The dick
The wounded bird
The perfectionist
The person who lacks confidence
The person who permits being abused
The loner
The outcast
The abused one
The insecure person
The fuck up
The mistreated one
The person who's angry that someone didn't come to their defense
The iconoclastic personality -- I will be heard!
The person who is super sensitive to being abused
The person who has a defensive barrier as to try not to be viewed as vulnerable or not smart
The spoiled brat.  I don't want to do this shit.  I don't have to do this shit.  There's gotta be a better way
The person who feels like something about their appearance holds them back
 

Watch:

 

Edited by Joseph Maynor

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@Joseph Maynor Any conceptual sense of self aka role seeing yourself this way or that way, whether positive or negative is Ego.

behind every positive self concept is the hidden fear of not being good enough. Behind every negative self concept is its desire of being greatest or better than others. Behind the confident ego's feeling of and continuing need for superiority is the unconscious fear of inferiority. Conversely, the shy, inadequate ego that feels inferior has a strong desire for superiority.

That's why its important to drop the ego (false you) and to identify with true you(awareness) which is formless consciousness.

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Resonate but not identify with being spoiled to some extent, but it just good to know what your weakness is so you can work on them.  

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I resonate with the following 

  1. The Lone wolf
  2. The quitter
  3. The person with low self-esteem
  4. The perfectionist

I try to get past these by working on myself everyday. For example I'm trying to work on not being a quitter by pushing myself a little more and believing that if I can do this, I can also do that.... so far it's helping. 

Although breaking out of these modes of behavior requires intense discipline and self transformation. 

@Joseph Maynor 

Btw the labels are really cool.. Perfect description of different personalities. 

Edited by Loreena

  1. Only ONE path is true. Rest is noise
  2. God is beauty, rest is Ugly 

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All roles are self-concepts created with the (backfiring) intention of wanting to feel competent within a certain social grouping (or to please someone).Once these are created then they continue to dominate your experience (even when you are alone there is no social demand) in the form of  "self"(egoic) - defining thought patterns,emotions,etc. The function of these self concepts is to seek some sort of "definition" so as to maintain a boundary. And the efforts made by these self concepts sabotage your happiness. 

 

Imagine your authentic self as a naked body.Meaning roles are costumes worn unconsciously and mistaken for the body

Step 1 : Become aware that you are not supposed to be immediately aware of a certain role,since it is a self-concept which is evident ONLY with certain circumstances UNLESS a contemplative effort is made.

Step 2 : Before making the contemplative effort, first commit to being ABSOLUTELY HONEST throughout your inquiry. Because when you start to find the birthplace of the role the egoic self senses threat and will come up with ANY thought pattern to distract you from letting go of the role.

Step 3 :  Once you choose a certain role 'X' go back to your memory to accurately pin point when in your life you seemed to have adopted this .

                          To help make this easier I suggest a conceptual framework.A  role may come anywhere in between this spectrum.

 

          ||||                                          ?                                                        ?                                                           ?                                                                    ||||    

VICTIMIZATION ___________________X_______________________________ X__________________________________X________________________________POWER-HUNGRY

           A                                                                                                                                                                                                                                               B

                                                                              Try to figure out where in this spectrum X lies.

 

 

If X lies near A try to remember the times you felt powerless, when you could't manipulate reality to your needs, and how you let your mind create thought patterns to confirm this belief of powerlessness.Subsequent actions were taken only to confirm this belief and you have come to identify them as yourself.By confirming the belief the role has been created, LO AND BEHOLD! the self has been defined.The costume has  been worn (because to be naked is to be open to the possibility of harm).

If X lies near B try to remember the times you felt powerless, when you couldn't manipulate reality to your needs, and how you were offended.You wanted to gain more control over reality and so the mind proceeded to adopt thought patterns to confirm this belief of having more control and seeking to constantly be in a state of power , constantly alert to any threats that make the self feel powerless. Thought patterns of wanting power created, there was seemingly sort of control at that situation, LO AND BEHOLD! the self has been defined.The costume has  been worn (because to be naked is to be open to the possibility of harm).

 

Step 4 : Once a role's roots have been discovered notice HOW its defining you conceptually and not allowing to directly experience yourself,                               restricting your authenticity. To help make this easier...

                                             Conceptual self (role)     --------------      Nature is goal-driven ( it's to satisfy something, a subtle sense of social pressure,has                                                                                                                    an introverted, self-checking mechanism)

                                             Authentic self (YOU)       --------------      Nature is self-expression for the joy of self-expression (NO SOCIAL PRESSURE, you are                                                                                                                  free of defining yourself in terms of the social groups.There is no need to                                                                                                                                        define  yourself --- you are extroverted with people and even when you are in solitude                                                                                                                  with yourself you will notice how even your thinking seems to be extroverted ---there is                                                                                                                no need for self-checking )

Step 5 : If you have been successful in letting go of the role you will notice 

                 a) a greater sense of social freedom, a cosmopolitan outlook ( you feel a citizen of the world, you are not part of any group )

                 b) being more in touch with your body ( you have come out of your head into your heart )         

                 c) increased stability of mind.                                           

                                                                                                                                                            and many other benefits which I will not be going into here.

 

 

NOTE !  :- Don't confuse verbal thinking with progress. Verbal thoughts are meant to point towards greater knowledge and so must always be directed towards the subject matter, in this case are roles. Also the understanding must be connected to the big picture.

 

I hope this short guide will help anyone wanting to drop their roles.This is just one method of contemplation which I think will be beneficial.Other methods will be equally appreciated.  

 

:D

 

 

 

 

 

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