Magnificent insight: pick up is sorcery!

[Ulax]

Just now, Olaf said:

@Ulax are you gonna pimp the whole forum?

Yesss. Just waiting on my pimp shades  and then its forum pimping season 

[Olaf]

@Ulax the pimp shades are essential. No shades no pimping. 

[Elliott]

Just being with acquaintences even, people that talk a lot, try to be funny or fun, people can see through that. Everyone else will be having a calm conversation or just watching the entertainment never needing to make the moment 'better' or make sure they're part of the conversation, just being with each other being enough.

 

 

You can get a girl that way don't get me wrong, but you don't need to. it can turn the very best ones off...... depending on what you're looking for

 

Edited 18 hours ago by Elliott

[Olaf]

@Elliott that is why in pick up you focus on self amusement instead of amusing her. I think you mistake being a performative clown with pick up. Simply being in a good energy is attractive and self amusement amplifies your own energy over the hours. Surely you can be quiet, but even then you are radiating energy, either needy, sad, apathetic, self amused etc. If you look at Owen he can pick woman up simply by his energy without saying a word.

Edited 17 hours ago by Olaf

[Elliott]

1 hour ago, Olaf said:

@Elliott that is why in pick up you focus on self amusement instead of amusing her. I think you mistake being a performative clown with pick up. Simply being in a good energy is attractive and self amusement amplifies your own energy over the hours. Surely you can be quiet, but even then you are radiating energy, either needy, sad, apathetic, self amused etc. If you look at Owen he can pick woman up simply by his energy without saying a word.

You try to focus on self amusement, but why are you in front of her, why are you out that night. Self amusement alone is trying even if no one else is there.

I'm not saying it won't work to pick up women, it obviously does.

Sure it works, and could work well for you. That's not what I meant. Some women see right through it and dismiss you for it, it's surface level and you'd be better off just being your own original self if you want that type of woman, the only type I myself would be interested in, but most of you it doesn't matter to, I was just saying some people just see through it and dismiss you for it. People that 'want' to fit in, don't fit in very well in some crowds, anything more than just being there outside of your head is just not going to be kosher, you don't have to do anything or be anything, the trying is annoying, surface level. Every person in the world is an interesting person if you just let yourself be yourself, boring is cool AF even, boring is interesting, boring is nice to be around, the little things about you that you will never notice are interesting and pleasant to be around, like a unique patch of flowers in a garden.

These flowers are "weeds", people pick them and spray them. Some people enjoy them, and love them even, just being with them, no jokes or stories, no questions.

 

You ever been to a pet adoption shelter, do you think the boring ones never get adopted?(most just lay there and do nothing). You think a woman isn't going to love her lazy cat or dog? You already emit a presence naturally, if you get rid of all this bullshit it will undoubtedly be a pleasant one. You don't need to do anything.

 

 

You're here existing in this crazy society, on this rock flying through the sky for the same blip of time as everyone else alive right now, that, that alone, makes you interesting AF. Enjoy the music show, tell the stranger next to you what you're seeing reminds you of or what intrigues you about it, even if it's a 70 year old deaf man. 

 

 

Edited 16 hours ago by Elliott

[Olaf]

@Elliott where else you gonna get a woman come from? knocking on your door? Falling from the sky? You either meet through tinder or some dating app or through approaching in real life, I don't see many other options here and both are equally try hard if you think about it. The only way to passively date is to be a woman on instagram who gets flooded by guys in her dm, but I am not a woman. 

[Elliott]

6 minutes ago, Olaf said:

@Elliott where else you gonna get a woman come from? knocking on your door? Falling from the sky? You either meet through tinder or some dating app or through approaching in real life, I don't see many other options here and both are equally try hard if you think about it. The only way to passively date is to be a woman on instagram who gets flooded by guys in her dm, but I am not a woman. 

I make friends with women all the time through normal social activities, sports activities, volunteering activities, political stuff, friends, just naturally at music shows, everywhere, I don't try to pick them up, I just like to engage with interesting people, and interesting people often engage with me first and I reciprocate. 

Edited 17 hours ago by Elliott

[LordFall]

13 hours ago, Elliott said:

Going out to do pick up is those things

Weird take, it's just an activity like any other where you go with the goal of meeting new people. Some people do the same thing with co-ed sports league or any other type of hobby. There is the added feedback loop of introspecting on your experience and getting advice from others on how to make your socializing more effective. Having a growth mindset and tracking your progress over time are effective ways to get better at any skillset. 

[Elliott]

2 hours ago, LordFall said:

Weird take, it's just an activity like any other where you go with the goal of meeting new people. Some people do the same thing with co-ed sports league or any other type of hobby. There is the added feedback loop of introspecting on your experience and getting advice from others on how to make your socializing more effective. Having a growth mindset and tracking your progress over time are effective ways to get better at any skillset. 

Some people can tell your behavior is synthetic. Even if your 'extroverted' behavior is not from practice or learning, the extra energy is synthetic, either from PUA or the mass psychosis of the culture, or masking.

If you have a hippy town near you, if you want to see what I'm trying to illustrate, next time you're there just sit next to the people at the bar and see what happens. It's not just hippy people that do this but that's where you find the highest concentration making it easily visible. How would your behavior change from a hippy brewery to a typical college bar and why.

You don't need to do anything special to be able to enter someone's life that you're already around, you're already in their life, they're already in yours, just live recognizing that and not hiding yourself. Did you need PUA to talk to your mom when you lived with her, you never made random comments to her? Some people do need help with social anxiety, I'm not trying to overlook that

This phenomena always reminds me of Europeans making fun of americans for having bleach white teeth, some say it freaks them out, it's sort of the same thing.

Edited 6 hours ago by Elliott

[Olaf]

@Elliott I feel this limits your dating options and if anything I would only go to those places to meet girls so it is basically the same thing, because why would I go to random place/concert and waste time? So it is no different then going to a club/bar or somewhere during the day. The biggest difference is that the one actually doing PUA learns social skills/energetic control/frame/confidence/becoming high value which are valuable skills beyond just meeting girls

[Elliott]

5 minutes ago, Olaf said:

@Elliott I feel this limits your dating options and if anything I would only go to those places to meet girls so it is basically the same thing, because why would I go to random place/concert and waste time? So it is no different then going to a club/bar or somewhere during the day. The biggest difference is that the one actually doing PUA learns social skills/energetic control/frame/confidence/becoming high value which are valuable skills beyond just meeting girls

You don't like going anywhere that girls do, except for pickup?

Are you doing pickup for sex, or marriage-dating?

[Olaf]

@Elliott no everything I do is at home, workout, eat, working on my purpose etc. I never have been someone to go randomly to workshops, sports activities, concerts etc. max go to a festival once a year. 

[Elliott]

3 hours ago, Olaf said:

@Elliott no everything I do is at home, workout, eat, working on my purpose etc. I never have been someone to go randomly to workshops, sports activities, concerts etc. max go to a festival once a year. 

Ya id have to do pick up if i was you.

 

3 hours ago, Olaf said:

@Elliott I feel this limits your dating options and if anything I would only go to those places to meet girls so it is basically the same thing, because why would I go to random place/concert and waste time? 

I'm not trying to talk you out of pickup but It's kind of mixed up in my eyes: you say you do pick up to save time, I suspect it takes a lot of time, maybe not, especially when you include dating. If you go out and just socialize treating women as friends you can filter them like the equivalent of dating 10 women at a time, while hopefully doing things you enjoy, apparently maybe not though. AND you don't have to eliminate women that you're just not sure of, you just keep it friends. With dating you waste a ton of time with people you're not sure of.

Do you focus on areas where you think you'll find a fellow homebody, like bookstores?

I'm just curious, I'm not trying to talk you out of it.

Edited 2 hours ago by Elliott