How to practice approaching women?

[fopylo]

@theleelajoker

That makes me happy to hear 😂

Kinda wondered whether people are tired of reading my shit or it's kinda entertaining/interesting. I'm literally suffering for you guys' entertainment haha

[fopylo]

Ok, I'm not gonna gatekeep anymore. I'll just recap like the last week and a half in short. So after the second date I moved to the city she lives in for a bit.

Date 3:

The highlight is that I came more calm, not trying to put effort anymore and allowing more of the silence to be and for her to also fill in some of the gaps. We also kissed towards the end of the date (asked her if I can kiss her), but it felt a little more natural and a bit more comfortable than the last time.

Date 4:

We had dinner (the setting was quite romantic. It was also raining a bit). After we finished eating I asked her if she wants to chill in my hotel room for a bit, and she agreed without trying to sound too eager. Once we got to the hotel it took me a while to find an opening to start kissing and making out with her. But after I found a moment of lingering eye contact I decided to lean in, this time for the first time without asking I f I can kiss her. We started making out and then she was laying on her back on the bed and I was above her and we were making out. I was fortunate to watch before the date Leo's video of how to have amazing sex:

So I tried incorporating the slow kissing, and then started kissing her body with the teasing of not knowing what will come next and preparing for the next part. Then slowly moving to the more sensitive parts until I started fingering her while making sure my eye contact was now more than before. She was getting wet, but it also hurt her, so I slowed down. Eventually she didn't really want me to play too much with her pussy because it just kept hurting her (she said it was about her first time). It was quite a bummer since this was literally blocking any chance of her having an orgasm and kinda ruined my game plan. So I kept kissing her body and played a little with her pussy, and at some point I asked her if she wants me to stick it in (asked her 3 times teasingly while rubbing it through the underwear on her). Then I got to take my pants off and it was soft... Took for it a long time to get hard and took even longer to put on the condom. Eventually we started doing missionary. Now the problem, again, was that it was hurting for her. We then went so fucking slow like 2-3 seconds in and 2-3 seconds out kinda rhythm and also half way in because it was hurting for her. Honestly was kinda boring. And the worst part was that it kept slipping out all the time. Like, all the time. And sometimes it took like a minute before realizing it was out. We were doing only missionary, and she was very passive. She didn't help putting my dick in her (I was struggling myself knowing where to stick it in as I was new to this). But like come on, all she did was lay down passively not try to make things better, kinda reluctant to try a different position, and at some point she just started getting tired and could see it very clearly on her eyes (eyes starting to close and look down). It was such a turnoff. It was a bit annoying. But I was still going. Going for a long time. I was just not feeling aroused and couldn't cum. I pulled out and just released it solo in the toilet. Quite a bummer. But at least we cuddled at night despite the bad sex.

 

Ok I'm gonna post the 5th and final date on another post.

[fopylo]

Ok, I'm gonna sum up the last date we had a few days ago.

This is juicy.

So for this date I remember I was a little nervous because like you said, there was already the sex and now it's the unknown of how it's gonna be now that the mystery is over. There is more of our worth on the line. Anyways, after finally meeting we went to this restaurant bar and got some food. But I felt that the talking wasn't that smooth and I was a little anxious when talking and sometimes the vibe wasn't completely there. At some point during the conversation she told me it's also her last night here in Surat Thani and she'll come back in a few days, so we both kinda understood it would be our last time seeing each other, which put some pressure on having sex, almost like it was expected to happen. After we finished eating and came back from the toilet I asked her if she wants to chill in my hotel and she was like "yes, I can" in a bit of a shy tone, as if this conversation wasn't expected.

We got back to the hotel and I cleaned my feet for a bit, she went to the bathroom, laid our stuff down, and offered her water. I was a bit anxious, especially when we both sat on the bed. I felt a bit pressured, but mostly I just wasn't relaxed enough to find an opening. At some point it became slightly easier, and after a bit of eye contact I said "ok let's cut the crap" as I'm leaning into her. Don't know if it was the best transition because she seemed slightly unsure, but we just got to it. After one kiss I offered both of us some mint sweets to make it more pleasant, and so it was for a bit (I didn't want the aftertaste like last time). So we got to making out, but this was our second time already so it involved a little more playfulness and laughed a little bit. Sometimes it was hard for her to get serious (in the sense she isn't laughing) but it was ok. Started kissing her body slowly until I got to her with my finger, and then 2 fingers gently, and she liked it. I stayed there for a bit, but she started getting dry. I then knew I had to "warm her up" again, so again I've started kissing her body with teases and slowly to the more sensitive areas. But the problem was that mid way she had this idea of starting to ask me all kinds of questions like "are you talking with other women?", "why are you on tinder?", "am I just one of those girls?", "what are you here for?" Like come on... She just HAD to kill the vibe. I sometimes stopped and just asked her if she's ok with what's going on here, because honestly I was starting to feel uncomfortable and didn't like her that much. She gave vibes of insecurity and toxicity. But nonetheless she said it's fine and to continue, even though it didn't seem 100% true by her face, but I continued. So I had to do this routine like 4 times because every time I got to her vagina she was dry like the desert, and then she was like "ohh, guess you have to do it all over..." I didn't quite like it, but I kept trying. The problem was that momentum just kept getting lost, whether she had to pee, laugh, or ask those stupid questions. No wonder I had to work like a slave (at some point when she went to pee I was already not in such a loving mood and so when she came back I asked her if she washed her vagina, with soap. After a little awkwardness but looking at her like I am not playing games she then went to wash it. I didn't care anymore). I was so desperate already, and so I told her I'll try it one last time. I got out of the bed, stood up, did some mental preparation and hyped myself, and then went in ALL in. I did it very slow and powerful. Thankfully she decided not to laugh or cut the momentum this time. I managed to pleasure her very good she started moaning a bit, and then also I got to play with her vagina which was wet, and it was great. But after a short time it became dry again, and it was annoying. I told her I was just trying to warm up her vagina enough before I stick it in. I asked her regardless if I should stick it in. She said "yes.." like it was obvious. So I go take my pants off and I'm soft like a macaroni. I was just not hard. I went to put the condom on my soft penis (luckily it was easier that way). Then I cam back, but it just still didn't get hard no matter how much closer I got to her even when I was kissing her body with my condom on. Eventually I tried sticking it in when it was like a third hard, which of course failed. She kinda suggested I go jerk it a bit in the toilet to make it hard. I decided I should. But I was a little frustrated. Frustrated that no matter how much I jerked it it won't get hard, and that she didn't really try helping. She might have thought this is embarrassing on my part, but I believe it's a lot because of her cutting of momentum all the time and making me feel uncomfortable with her questions so that I just probably didn't feel relaxed enough around her for it. After a long time in the toilet just trying to get it hard I've decided to give up and end the sex, and that I'll just take the condom off and jerk off in the toilet. Taking the condom off didn't help however. I wasn't really in the mood, and decided to just pack it up. It was a little bit of an awkward atmosphere in the room afterwards. But then we were both lying on the bed and we just started talking a bit in general about life and stuff. Then out of nowhere she wanted us to do some TikTok video that we are like hugging and kissing, like those cringe couples even though we are not a couple. I understood she has some ego of portraying and what people think which adds up to the stuff above I've already said that made me not really like her anymore. I eventually went to seven eleven, and even got her something she asked for. When going to bed we this time didn't cuddle, and each one had his own blanket. In the morning she woke up before me, and while I'm still kinda sleepish we were being playful and tickling each other and teasing and also talking. Felt like we were couples. It seemed more like this was more of her fantasy even though I know we are going separate ways in a few hours, and probably she knew in the back of her mind. So that was that. We gave a hug for goodbye, said a few words and then she left. This was the end.

I then stayed 3 more nights in Surat Thani just chilling and reflecting. This phase of Surat Thani and that Thai girl has ended, and now I'm in Khao Sok.

[fopylo]

Man sometimes I just hate this forum! Writing something long and then as I click "post" the website goes down and everything gets erased and have to write it all over again. Why the hell does the website keep falling down? Not first time.

 

Anyways, I wrote something along the lines of ever since seeing her from January 1st to January 10th I haven't been doing any approaches, which would make sense since I've been putting most of the energy in our dates and building this learning experience of the different stages until sex. Not enough learning yet, but still some good gems. Now it is already January 15th, and I still haven't done approaches...

Spending those days with her made it very easy to just be alone and not socialize with other people since she was the main focus (I stayed at a hotel also). But now that I'm at a hostel and in a generally more social environment I feel it to be hard to socialize, let alone approach. It's mostly the state, just hard to get into state. I lost the momentum I once had.

But then - what is the point of game? If it is to just keep sleeping with women then it would make no sense... It wouldn't make sense because if it is doing approaches then many of the times sex won't happen the first time you meet and that'll turn into getting to future dates and spending more time getting to know eachother and escalating and making moves... This requires energy. Can't do that with a few women at the same time and ALSO keep approaching new women at the same time. Kinda enforces the mindset that the current woman isn't enough. And I'm not even talking about the women that would despise you for talking to other women while you're dating them, and the fear of being in this situation.