Reflecting on my relationship to this forum...

[Inliytened1]

@Emerald you also have to understand you're talking to a buch of guys here. So take it with a grain of salt.   None of us understand the depth of your studies into the Feminine.  How could we. But maybe we should invest in the course if you have one.  I'd like to understand a woman and I'd pay for it haha

Edited 54 minutes ago by Inliytened1

[Emerald]

48 minutes ago, Inliytened1 said:

@Emerald you also have to understand you're talking to a buch of guys here. So take it with a grain of salt.   None of us understand the depth of your studies into the Feminine.  How could we. But maybe we should invest in the course if you have one.  I'd like to understand a woman and I'd pay for it haha

I do understand that. 

And while I do think it's important for men to integrate their Feminine side (which requires some deeper know-how beyond the cultural conception of the female-like-ness), I get that it may not be their top priority to do so.

The main thing, with my conversation with the other poster is that he's focusing on the question of "What's empirically true about cultural conceptions of Femininity according to studies?"

But my focus is, "What is going to be an effective subjective paradigm on Femininity that I can use (and other women can use) to reconnect with the Feminine in a word that is either unaware of or actively devalues deeper expressions of the Feminine principle?"

So, my perspective is "What's effective for integrating the Feminine?"

And his perspective is, "What's empirically true about woman-like-ness and female gender roles on a cultural level?"

But the answer to his question doesn't give me any tools or perspectives to work with that are effective for my own ends.

And to be fair, I did try his way first. I experienced the Feminine directly at age 20. And I tried to shove myself into the traditional female gender role for the first few years of my twenties. And I was with my husband at 20. And I was a mom by 22. So, I was really trying to be just a mom and wife and to carve away my previous identity.

But this diminished me and didn't feel anything like what I experienced at 20... which was this deep peaceful essence pregnant with eroticism and power that existed in the night and the trees. And I had made myself very very small.

Then, at around 22-23, I stumbled into reading some Feminist literature. And for a few months, I got really into that. And it unwired some more surface-level barriers to reconnecting with m Feminine. But it didn't go deep enough.

Then, at 23, I was listening to Tool in my room and pacing around and was in deep contemplation. And the phrase "Masculine and Feminine principle" jumped into my mind. And I hadn't heard those phrases before. But they felt like something interesting to me.

So, I went immediately to Google and typed it in. And I found this woman's blog called Matrignosis. Her name is Jean Raffa and (at the time) she was in her early 70s. And she is a Jungian enthusiast who speaks a lot about Feminine integration... and her experiences with integrating the Feminine.

And as I read her blog, I felt like I was reading the work of a 70 year old version of myself. And she was wise and deeply connected to the Feminine. And the struggles she spoke of with her own polarization into the Masculine was so relatable... and I'm sure many women would find it relatable.

Then, that was my first effective in-road to the path that leads the deep Feminine.

Prior to that I was just looking in ineffective places... first in traditional patriarchal Femininity, which is very man-centered and Masculinity-centered. Then, I looked into Feminist perspectives, which were more helpful... but still very surface level and still very Masculinity-centered.

So, finding deeper perspectives to go on the journey was necessary. It's been my main internal journey over the past 16 years.