Reframing emotional pain mega-thread.

[Rishabh R]

@Lyubov Yes negative emotions are built on lies and stories which we tell ourselves about particular event. And keep telling oneself the stories which cause negative emotions or switching to empowering stories is a choice.

As per my belief it's impossible to remain happy 24x7. Our emotions are not withing our control but how we respond to our emotions or our ability to regulate our emotions is within our control.

[Rishabh R]

22 minutes ago, Lyubov said:

Because what else would negative emotions be built on but lies? “I’m not good enough, there’s something wrong with me/life.” Is that even true?  Do you want to build your perception of reality on lies? 

That is the point of this whole thread. Reframing or viewing reality more accurately.

[Lyubov]

Why do you believe it’s not possible to always stay aligned with truth? What about that notion do you believe is false? I’m not saying it’s a failing if you choose otherwise or you need to chase perfection or doing everything right. Why do you believe that is an impossibility to you? I mean you recognize you create your emotions through your beliefs. So what’s stopping you from no longer creating what you don’t want? I don’t think it’s about the switching to a positive story. It’s seeing through the story until you see it’s so false that you could never choose to believe it again. 

Edited Sunday at 11:52 PM by Lyubov

[Natasha Tori Maru]

I think we are beginning to touch on what some term 'emotional bypassing' or toxic positivity? 

Reframing is powerful in that it can invigorate us with a powerful drive to get up and try again.

Using this drive to suppress the emotion behind the negative outcome is what you do not want. This ends up as a cognitive bias that will loop. And you can end up with all sorts of bad stuff like samskara. The emotion or hurt is felt - whether we choose to perceive it or not.

So they key is to ALLOW the emotion, but not be completely overtaken by it and know it will pass. Feel the hurt, and know that the next steps are to let it go to proceed to action to try again. Know that it will not harm you. It will pass.

You need to have it in your hands (feel it, allow it) to let it go. Otherwise it ends as bypassing and toxic positivity or a toxic growth mindset.

With that in mind I think reframing is great - everything in balance  

 

[Rishabh R]

@Natasha Tori Maru Yup radical self-acceptance of negative emotions is necessary. We must not supress our emotions but rather process them.

[Rishabh R]

Guys,right now I was emotionally reactive and was cursing/reacting violently the people who did wrong to me in the past. However, later I sat down and did nothing which calmed me down.

[Yimpa]

https://giphy.com/gifs/lemonerdy-amazing-you-rock-youre-J7GGZj4j96Bl7V8LtB

[Rishabh R]

@Yimpa Thanks.