Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0
Behind20

I became angry because my eyes had become really bad.

44 posts in this topic

1 hour ago, Behind20 said:

I would even thought @Hojo to be a part of them.

They cut me off or ban me from a lot of things so that I had to be in public so that they could see me.  writing this

 

God given is but I went back and all things bad had happened. 

Should I write it fully? what if they're watching me? 

 

When I was writing this I only want a 

Can I even say these? 

 

 

Lt m put it clearly , cctv? That was the last immeadiate thing I could think of at the top of my state now (that is not so good like you could say you can un alive me because of how much I'm tired or exhausted right now (eyes & above) . ) totally utterly tired but I couldn't stop or do anything about it and things are just stacking up. one after another. (You think I got the will to continue this thread? No.) But I can't stay still either. Of course I am not ready 100% or at all but the time is coming? Short term mind / thinking as if I hadn't already lost it. 

Friend? That was a few years ago. (My mind would go between year and then coming back to now.  That why I said I'm better dead). why can't it be just immediate thing?  - stacking up things - forgotten - bad. - and on top of that my eyes could barely even still working (am I exaggerating? Nowho knwos. ) 

Think of ...  An old person. 

None of these , none of everything ive ever written shall come out of my mouth. none. 

 

@Hojo life are too silly for me these days (that immediate things are happening to me) so I'd wanna put (or I search for all the cctv that are in my state /city (outside cctv) to see what happened in the sky that moment. (But there aren't any. Cctv. Online. That I could look for. ) So I thought I wanna put one outside in case if anything happened.

But this just passed by. Until some day ago. When I bring it up , without ever telling anyone. I havent but I'm about to. And then ,  as if I hadn't been summoned already everyday , it happened. I've been surrounded (from front and back , or left and right) however you wanna see it. And it happened. I was pulled. My thought was taken. Maybe , my headache had been caused by the hair oil im using. Because in this dream , I saw three of those up in the air floating. And then I pull it back down (inside my room) its happening inside the house. I pull it back down and take it out from the luggage /suitcase. I dont remember anything else . And these things are still like floating. and before this , I saw a cctv screen right above my head at the corner nook of the room.  Ceiling. Up. it was , looking at me. And outside was that. i wouldnt get any of these or all of these if (idk.) and then , also it was about 2024. 3? Idk. that memory was brought or summoned too . (Idk why seriously.) So as soon as i woke up i went to x to ask her to do that. And it was fine. Though im sick. sickening. unresolved thing? (Because we cant act like nothing happened.) And act like nothings happened (so I was a bit sick. (Sickening.)) so i just do it. And somehow , closing my eyes would be better. Felt better. (I said im tired even after waking up.(morning.))

So i was just sleeping on my mom's bed waiting for her saying that i wanna do the laundry (eventhough I actually didnt.) wanna. It just appeared on my dream and had been brought back or someone had summoned that memories 

 

Backward?      Way.   Backward.    

And of course I did things that are out of the ordinary *not what wslas usual* because that dream freaked me out so I went back 

They had summoned me and then my mom and dad summoned them and that how it goes. For a moment , truth can be seen and then it ended. Turning back to normal or whatever. But the sorcery was done and can be seen.   I can choose not to do it at all but they keep on making me part of it. Without me ever wanting it. to be involved. in their shi. But I was used anyway whether I wanted to or not. Things had gone really backward. they too were freaked out and then gather or had to be together. (Among themselves.) And at one moment they had to leave their child to me alone. because of the sorcery. So all these while i was the child unattended by any of my parents. Huh? And it would be a moment , when i turned away that they would took their child ,in a second and was lost from the scene. so they too were freaked out but had to leave their child to make the sorcery work. Idk. Idk. This is some deadly deadass ancient old type of sorcery. (Wtf im not interested) But things that they learned or whatever while being in --- (x) 

 

This shouldn't be it but I'm weak.   (To fight that which they should do or leqrn in x) I'm on my deathbed.

I mean , *to fight that which they learn in x . I'm on my deathbed. 

 

And maybe they are born like this and I wasn't. (Because they do it all too easily . ) the sorcery. 

If I were 

See what I'm saying.  What the hell did I just read .you were raped .it happens. Don't worry you are unconditionally loved.  Love is real .God exists .but stop with this nonsense. Write like a human being .and let's think of a solution like grown ups 

 


 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

This could be the one case where putting your comments into chat gpt and asking it to rewrite it is a good thing.


Sometimes it's the journey itself that teaches/ A lot about the destination not aware of/No matter how far/
How you go/How long it may last/Venture life, burn your dread

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Imagine being with your rapist everyday. How does that not make you weak? Weaker. 

 

I blocked that guy @Hojo

Edited by Behind20

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
24 minutes ago, Hojo said:

This could be the one case where putting your comments into chat gpt and asking it to rewrite it is a good thing.

I wanted to write it again fully but nah. 

I pitied those who have to read* it or read it with its missing link. /something missing. Unfull. But there's 

 

(Someone that's watching me? I said there are those thats watching me)

Edited by Behind20
*something tht had been cut

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
9 minutes ago, Behind20 said:

Imagine being with your rapist everyday. How does that not make you weak? Weaker. 

 

I blocked that guy @Hojo

Blocked me or Hojo ? You were physically raped .Hojo is braindead more done with life than Leo himself he will make you mentally raped as well . But I'm cutting the bullshit with you . You were raped .that's a fact. End of story .it happened. It did .can't go to the past and change it .but you can..once again..stop writing like this and write clearly so that help can be provided.  Otherwise I have no mercy for you. But God has infinite mercy for you . Rape is unconditional love .


 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
16 minutes ago, Behind20 said:

I wanted to write it again fully but nah. 

I pitied those who have to read* it or read it with its missing link. /something missing. Unfull. But there's 

 

(Someone that's watching me? I said there are those thats watching me)

Awesome. So you insist on being weird. Maybe you actually have autism but i don't think it's impossible for autistic people to say :" this is what happened to me .what should you ?".

And since you ignored my guidance about 3-5 times ..then I'm suspicious that  you being raped is even real .I mean you could be lying right ? No honesty from your part = goodbye from my part .


 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
20 minutes ago, Behind20 said:

something tht had been cut

And what exactly should that evoke ? Many Christian monks in the past literally used nails to ruin their eyes to lose vision or chopped off their penis in order to transcend sexual lust altogether and can just worship God and be pure spirits . Why are you saying when you are a female ? 

I'm seriously out .for real this time . I don't appreciate mumbling around .it's cringe and sticky .and cold.  I don't get why people like you exist. 


 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I ordered a meditation brain wave device to show you how brain dead I am.

I am sorry you were raped in your shit hole country that devalues women and they have no help. I would he paranoid too that shits fked up.

Edited by Hojo

Sometimes it's the journey itself that teaches/ A lot about the destination not aware of/No matter how far/
How you go/How long it may last/Venture life, burn your dread

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
2 minutes ago, Hojo said:

I ordered a meditation brain wave device to show you how brain dead I am.

I am sorry you were raped in your shit hole country that devalues women and they have no help. 

Dude he has mental stuff going on. Relax. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@PurpleTree i am being empathetic.


Sometimes it's the journey itself that teaches/ A lot about the destination not aware of/No matter how far/
How you go/How long it may last/Venture life, burn your dread

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Hojo who cares ? Nobody actually exist .and I'm you and you are me and it's all love . Once you realize this you can be swimming In volcano lava but enjoy your time .


 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
3 minutes ago, Someone here said:

@Hojo who cares ? Nobody actually exist .and I'm you and you are me and it's all love . Once you realize this you can be swimming In volcano lava but enjoy your time .

You should change username to “nobody here”😂

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Someone here Because when you need empathy you want it and it feels good to have. If you ever go to sleep again you need it or you get stuck in an infinite spiral of terror. Only empathy from other versions of yourself can save you. So be what you want to have to you when you go to sleep again.


Sometimes it's the journey itself that teaches/ A lot about the destination not aware of/No matter how far/
How you go/How long it may last/Venture life, burn your dread

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

@Sugarcoat I just read a guru called Robert Adams. I'm sorry for betraying Leo but this guy Robert Adams made me go to heaven. 


 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
1 minute ago, Someone here said:

@Sugarcoat I just read a guru called Robert Adams. I'm sorry for betraying Leo but this guy Robert Adams made me go to heaven. 

Good for you. I’ll check him out

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
5 minutes ago, Hojo said:

@Someone here Because when you need empathy you want it and it feels good to have. If you ever go to sleep again you need it or you get stuck in an infinite spiral of terror. Only empathy from other versions of yourself can save you. So be what you want to have to you when you go to sleep again.

Pardon?  Then you get upset for calling you braindead. I bet the brain disappeared and there is empty ethereal space inside the skull .

Ps .come on man we are playing right ?😂 We are not gonna lose  our imaginary online friendship. We make for a good gay couple .


 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
16 minutes ago, Sugarcoat said:

You should change username to “nobody here”😂

There's just some things in this forum which are just uncrossable lines . You can't change your username unless you're mod . No idea what's the idea here.  Another one is go to the search bar and search for the word " God " but you won't get any results .Leo disabled it. Even though you could argue its the most used word here . Leo disabled it .why?  Ask him . Actually go do it and you will laugh .it made my day .


 "When you get very serious about truth you accept your life situation exactly as it is. So much so that you aren't childishly sitting around wishing it were otherwise.If you were confined to a wheelchair you would just accept it as how reality is. Just as you now just accept that you are not a bird who can fly."

-Leo Gura. 

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!


Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.


Sign In Now
Sign in to follow this  
Followers 0