Examples of powerful therapy/coaching demonstrations

[Wilhelm44]

Share with us examples of valuable therapy/coaching demonstrations, that could potentially trigger a breakthrough for someone here.

Edited April 8 by Wilhelm44

[Wilhelm44]

Being molested as a child is the topic here. Core of the session is from 14:15 until around 27:30.

Edited April 7 by Wilhelm44

[Wilhelm44]

One of the top coaches out there.

 

[Lyubov]

 

 

[Wilhelm44]

 

[Wilhelm44]

Shame and guilt, is the topic in this demonstration.

 

[hyruga]

Personally, I don't really think people suffered huge traumas in their childhood.

Most of the traumas are suffered in their adulthood when people go through dramatic life experiences. So people who just teaches on 'inner child' is not addressing the full problem as there is still the 'inner adult'.

Furthermore, most people forget about things that happened many years ago. Problems at present should take priority over last issues.

[Wilhelm44]

6 hours ago, hyruga said:

Personally, I don't really think people suffered huge traumas in their childhood.

Most of the traumas are suffered in their adulthood when people go through dramatic life experiences. So people who just teaches on 'inner child' is not addressing the full problem as there is still the 'inner adult'.

Furthermore, most people forget about things that happened many years ago. Problems at present should take priority over last issues.

The unhealed traumas from childhood repeat themselves in adulthood, disguised as brand new traumas. That is, until we heal the root. Most people live their 'adult' lives through the filter of childhood decisions. These decisions usually take the form of a self negating lie, ie not being good enough etc. As children we also develop coping strategies to prevent the trauma from ever happening again. Although valid during childhood, these coping mechanisms screw us over during adulthood. Healing basically involves a clear recognition that the original decision was based on a lie, and that it's safe now to surrender the coping strategy, as well as beneficial, because all it's really doing is preventing one's limitless potential from taking the reigns. 

[meta_male]

@hyruga Your argument really overlooks how fragile childhood is. Kids don't have the coping mechanisms adults do, they don't have the language to express what's happening to them. You're basically saying that adults are the ones to experience real trauma, not kids.

It's not about how big or visible an event is, it's about how overwhelming it feels to the person experiencing it. Do only adults lose a family member? Are there no kids in war zones? Only adults experience abuse? You can imagine how much bigger an impact such events have on children. The mind is good at hiding it from them and all efforts to heal trauma are in vain if not looked at the root of where those immense emotions formed. Whether an event is forgotten or not doesn't matter. Trauma is stored in the body, it's not just a memory.

[hyruga]

I was referring to the fact that you may have healed your inner child but you have not healed your inner adult. Traumas sustained during adulthood.

[Wilhelm44]

18 hours ago, hyruga said:

I was referring to the fact that you may have healed your inner child but you have not healed your inner adult. Traumas sustained during adulthood.

Im not saying it's impossible for there to be adult trauma without any link to childhood. But 99 percent of the time there is still some kind of echo. When you look at any adult trauma, and you boil it down to its essential emotion and meaning given, it's still helpful to honestly check when you first experienced something like that with a similar texture/flavor. (even if on the surface it appears to be two different themes.) For example, lets say someone lost a parent at a very young age. And then in their 30's they experience a devastating relationship breakup. Seemingly unrelated events right ? But energetically it could simply be an opportunity to complete the grieving process, for which the child didn't have the capacity nor the intelligence at the time.

 

Edited April 10 by Wilhelm44

[Adrian colby]

@Wilhelm44 Thanks for this topic. I find it very useful to have a collection of techniques as I use Gabor mates compassionate enquiry for preparatory sessions before doing any psychedelic ceremonies. 
move recently started using philosophical midwifery along side compassionate enquiry and IFS as the mechanism of enquiry is the same- tracing back a pattern from a dysfunctional emotional reaction. In Phil midwifery it’s using one’s dreams as a mirror of the day. I’ve also started using peoples day dreams and daily fantasy as an indicator of what is missing or a desire in life they feel they lack. Contrasting that with what the mind presents in the night dream, tends to point to a core beleif much like compassionate enquiry does. It’s fascinating. 
I like to get trauma, psychology, mind traps out the way first before pointing to any kind of advanced spiritual experiences. The learning of the mind continues on in the psychedelic but at least they are some way prepared in how to use it as a tool cause I’ve seen too many going straight in and developing a temporary psychosis that traumatises them on top of everything else. 

[Wilhelm44]

35 minutes ago, Adrian colby said:

@Wilhelm44 Thanks for this topic. I find it very useful to have a collection of techniques as I use Gabor mates compassionate enquiry for preparatory sessions before doing any psychedelic ceremonies. 
move recently started using philosophical midwifery along side compassionate enquiry and IFS as the mechanism of enquiry is the same- tracing back a pattern from a dysfunctional emotional reaction. In Phil midwifery it’s using one’s dreams as a mirror of the day. I’ve also started using peoples day dreams and daily fantasy as an indicator of what is missing or a desire in life they feel they lack. Contrasting that with what the mind presents in the night dream, tends to point to a core beleif much like compassionate enquiry does. It’s fascinating. 
I like to get trauma, psychology, mind traps out the way first before pointing to any kind of advanced spiritual experiences. The learning of the mind continues on in the psychedelic but at least they are some way prepared in how to use it as a tool cause I’ve seen too many going straight in and developing a temporary psychosis that traumatises them on top of everything else. 

Thanks man, IFS therapy looks fascinating, I'm going to look into it more. I tried something a little different/similar once called Family Constellations. The person who's receiving the healing will sit on a chair in the front of the room. The other participants will stand in different positions in the room, representing different family members (alive or deceased) of that person. As the facilitator guides the process, lets say I'm representing that person's grandmother, then I literally experience the emotions of the grandmother, connected to the particular trauma in question. Person in the chair has a lot of aha's and integration when hearing the participants verbalize what they are experiencing. Somehow taking part in the whole process brings healing to everyone involved. Don't ask me how it works, it just does. Haven't tried it for years, but it's really powerful. 

Edited April 10 by Wilhelm44

[Wilhelm44]

@Adrian colby Thanks, I like this parts work type stuff. Really helps one to see parts that have been labelled as 'lazy' or 'self sabotaging' etc in a completely new light.

 

Edited April 10 by Wilhelm44

[Lyubov]

22 hours ago, hyruga said:

I was referring to the fact that you may have healed your inner child but you have not healed your inner adult. Traumas sustained during adulthood.

It’s an interesting topic. I think the inner child is just a label for that part of the mind or the belief system that culminates in some belief of lacking, being separe, not being able to cope, not being good enough. Usually these concepts form in childhood. I think you absolutely can go through some incredibly difficult situations as an adult, life has many of those, maybe even materially harder that anything experienced as a child. I think our childhood belief system though that we maybe have built upon for many years ends up coloring these difficult experiences, making them more painful for us, usually believing the outside world says something about our inherent worth. 

Edited April 10 by Lyubov

[Adrian colby]

Another thing I’ve noticed and started doing prior to any advanced spirituality is ‘embodiment’

if it’s a trauma or neurological or one of many occurrences that makes a person overwhelmed and unable to cope or regulate their nervous system, they tend to disembody or dissassociate. In other words they ( the soul) contracts itself up into the head ( a restricted form of mind). Like living from the neck up. Shut down and lacking access to the body so they don’t get information from their emotional states. Someone who is so contracted can’t even feel the emotions so they have no way to trace their way back to what caused the trauma. It’s what could be described as a total imbalance of the divine masculine and femanine where the femanine ( emotion) is cut off and the masculine ( logical/reasoning intellect) is engaged and lived through instead. 
a person can be fairly successful living from the mind and even have a great ability at metaphysical thought but the lived experience neccessary for growth isn’t embodied so there’s always something unfulfilled or unsatisfied about life. 
most people are disembodied and probably why allot of people seek out practices like yoga, breath-work, qi gong etc. bringing someone back into the body and re familiarising them with the sensations is a first step. 
coming into contact with a strong emotion, trapped emotion or tension in the body is the part therapists are afraid to bring a person to. 
these sensations can be the residues of a trauma and can flood a memory, re-traumatising someone so it’s important to teach emotional and nervous system regulation practices to help someone cope when they begin to face memories or somatic releases.

in the ancient mystery schools this would be likened to initiation and preparing someone for contact with the higher mind by going through the release and purification process of tensions and energies held onto by the body and mind. 
 

psychology and therapy is starting to catch up with this by introducing things like ‘clearing method’ and training therapists to sit with and ‘hold space’ for a client who is coming back into contact with the emotion and thoughts of their trauma. Slowly and gently is best so the client can work their way through it without becoming re-traumatised and shut down or disconnected again ( sometimes worse than before). This is why it’s not always advised to use psychedelic therapy before a good deal of teaching how to regulate and observe one’s self as the substances force open access to the higher mind and increase sensitivity dramatically. 
 

it’s also being noticed that people doing a lot of ‘new age’ or spiritual body practices classes have people going into somatic release or re-embodying to intense sensations and not actually understanding what is happening so the clients are not getting any help or advice how to advance beyond a stage that can end up shutting them down again.