Finished the LP course

[Yimpa]

13 minutes ago, Jannes said:

And now I feel good for whatever reason I cant explain. 

As if I got my hormones. Adhd perhaps. 

 

[Jannes]

On 5.1.2026 at 2:31 AM, Yimpa said:

 

Oh yeah, thats the spirit. 

Its also just the night that boosts my mind. 

[Jannes]

My one friend seems to break up with his gf in the near future. 

I am not sure how much of a role I played in that. It puts the whole dynamic in my old theatre club into question again, I see them both as relatively mature adults ...

[Jannes]

Having with a discussion with another person on WhatsApp about a lecture in university. 

I put some own thoughts into it and get some (in my opinion) unreflected and shallow pushback.

My blood is boiling. There were so many times in my life when I had thoughts about something and people called me something that wasnt true. 

[Jannes]

14 hours ago, Yimpa said:

Keep on peddling the Truth you Silly Little Devil you

 

[Jannes]

I was at my social spot again after about two weeks. Was pretty nervous about it. It was better then before though because I was refreshed. Usually hugging lots of people feels to much for me but now it was super okay. And that was kind of key to my socializing success or that socializing felt easy. I was very little internally as well, much more extroverted feeling.

[Jannes]

I hate getting into body doubling. You meet a complete stranger, its always such a jump into the cold water. Found a Discord channel though with a big lobby that I can just join. That feels more managable. 

[Jannes]

And everyone is just muted as well. 

[Jannes]

Its working perfectly. Pretty much just as good as 1 on 1 it feels like. Holy shit this is fantastic, its so much more comfortable to do this way. 

[Jannes]

What a weird day. I talked to my study group and a friend of mine on the phone for a total of about 6 hours today. 

Then I watched 1.5 hours of Ukraine and Russian war content. 

And the day is almost over now. 

Feels very weird, not used to that structure. 

[Jannes]

I added Political Talk Shows to my Entertainment List. 

Got Wordle, Chess Puzzle, Vlad Vexler, Country Quiz and now also Political Talk Shows on there. Very selective to not numb my mind. Crazy that I actually mostly maintain that strictness. 

[Jannes]

Damn, found clips of Putin speaking in German. Its not just a language barrier ..

 

[Jannes]

Today at my RV Session I felt like I grasped intuition. I hold it in my mind for some time, as a clear, distinguishable and pure state.  
And a lot of memory "ooooh that's what intuition was all along" flashed.

[Jannes]

First thought on intuition: 

The intuitive self is denied because it doesn't have the human agenda

[Jannes]

I always thought this scene in Star Wars was happening in the senate building. It actually doesnt, it happens in a seperate building, the Galactic Opera House. 

That misunderstanding inspired me though. 

When we are in the midst of politic, its hard to understand whats going on because we are personally involved in it. 

If it was possible to metaphysically and artistically express what is going on, that would be worth gold. 

I talked politics with a friend yesterday and said something along the lines of that the times are shitty but you also learn a lot because when systems break you can see inside them. Thats the sort of abstract, non judgemental artistic kind of way I think about. 

[Jannes]

Just saw the wpmi - girl on Bumble. She is looking for Dating or Intimacy without Commitment. How I thought. I think. 

Well that much emotional closeness wasnt good for me though if it isnt serious.