Visitor

Oh, okay. Thanks.

@TruthWhat I meant is, Is there no reality before humans appeared. What about geological formations, fossils, formation of elements and astrophysics.

The idea is to get to really be honest with yourself to see how your ego plays a role in your life. Mainly that it always seeks validation, because it is not valid, but just a story the mind has created to make sense of itself. The more validation it can gather the more energy it has to exploit itself and others for more validation. This energy (validity) is what I refer to as ego-energy or self-esteem. Esteem means 'respect and admiration'. How to get around this is to truly know and accept yourself (good and bad). Be your own judge, but be okay with yourself too, since nobody is perfect. In this way, by being true to yourself, and accepting it, you'll know that you are still okay, even without external validation. You may see yourself lower than a worm, but you will also know that this worm is still capable of loving, caring and true. From this, is where your okayness is centered/located. This transformation from basing your life on your fearful deceptive self to basing it on your loving true Self, is like building up enough self-esteem to a point of no longer needing it. You'll know when this becomes you for all that matters in life is to be true, genuine and real. You will value this above anything else, even relationships, even all the money in China (so to speak), and it all comes from within you.

It seems like you are basing reality only on recorded human history?

Live and let live. Realize that everybody is totally responsible for their OWN thoughts and actions. Tough Love. Love your mother, but not what she thinks or does that is not supporting her well-being. Just leave that bit alone.

Kieranperez, it is time for you to go to any lengths to change. Why? Because you have come to the point of believing you are a mistake, which is not true, but that is what is stopping you from changing. Remember this: Guilt is healthy because what it says is: "I made a mistake, I better not do that again". Hence we change. Shame is unhealthy because what it says is: "Because I do not change, I must be a mistake". Hence we don't change. The reason we did not change, after feeling guilty, is due to some fear. Possibly the fear of not coping with the change. However, if one does not change and keeps making the same mistake because of it, they will end up believing that they are a mistake. Hence "...is what I deserve". But NOBODY is a mistake. Shame feelings tells us that we are afraid to change, and the only way to deal with fear is to face it (accept the fear and do it anyway). It is by facing the fear is how we demythicize it, and learn that there was nothing to fear in the first place.

My words on blue What to do? Grieve. It's okay to be sad about your loss. Come to a point of acceptance so you can move on (this may take a few months). Learn how you have created your own grief through conditional love. As explained above. Learn how to love unconditionally. Don't love what that person can do for you. but love their truth. It is their truth that is innocent and expresses love unconditionally. So by loving their love that loves you, you will identify what you love is the same as the love that comes from you. In other words, the love you experience is your own and not dependent on the other person to express it. Live one day at a time. See all people as free spirits that have the right to come and go. So every time you see your next partner with you, or visiting you, remember that it is a gift. And every time they go away to do their own life in the day, be okay with the idea that you may never see them again, and be grateful to have met the person in your life. In that way, when you see them again, it will be like falling in love all over again.

@Annetta Depends on where you are coming from, your reference point, from which you regard yourself to be. If it is ego-self, then you think and behave according to the ego. If it is spiritual-self, then you think and behave according to the spirit.

I have not read the article. However, to love unconditionally is to only love the truth. Unconditional love only comes from truth, otherwise the love would come from what is untrue (deceptive and self seeking). So, what ever truth (not facts) you may find in a person, like those mentioned, is what is loved. The rest is not acknowledged as true, but as untrue acts or beliefs of a person who at those times were deluded. It is similar to a parent who loves their child though they may not like what they do, or have done. Or loving the sweat aroma of a deadly flower.

The ideal actualization is to realize / become one's full potential in terms of being their true self. Many may simply see this as discovering themselves in terms of mental and physical ability. Others may see it as spiritual development in terms of becoming a true person. Others again may have other ideas and ideals. Personally I like the spiritual side of actualization. In this regard, the idea is to realize my full spiritual potential of being a true (truthful or truth-filled) person. To do so, requires the ego to remain dormant.

@CuteCornDog Yes, I would be angry and resentful if that happened to my dog. Yet, after going through my grief and loss of my dog, I know I would have to come to a point of acceptance, or else I will be nursing a grudge which only drains my life energy for no reason. After all, Omar Mateen is dead. Personally, I have lost many loved ones in my life. In fact I was at a funeral last Thursday. It seems the older I get more frequent funerals come around. It is sad, and being sad is okay. It has a way of reminding us how much we valued what is now lost, and how blessed we were to experience that value while it was with us. And we can accept that too.

The default mode for the ego is exploitation. It does this because no matter what we know, collect, gather and claim for the self, it will never be enough because the self is empty/nothing. It cannot be filled because it is nothing but a fabricated story for the mind to make some sort of sense of itself. During exploitation everything and anything will eventually be used and wasted, and ALL FOR NOTHING.

We all experience anger and resentment. They are just two of the many forms of fear. How to deal with it? In a nutshell. Acceptance. Accept everything that is not, and has not, gone your way. Don't worry, you'll still be okay if things don't go the way you would like them to.

My words in blue. No matter how bad an experience, one can learn something else from it. The first time I came across this lesson came about after reading a book by Viktor Frankl, "Man's Search for Meaning".

Self hypnosis works well. While in a sleep position say to yourself on each breathe out 'deeper'. This works very well for me. One time I could not sleep because I had something going on in my life which I did not know how to handle. I was doing head miles throughout the night. I tried everything to get some shuteye. I even tried counting sheep. The next day I told my co-worker about this. He, being a Christian, said, "Next time, instead of counting sheep, go talk to the Shepherd". So that night as I laid in bed I spoke to the Shepherd. I soon fell asleep and slept like a rock. It makes a big difference to share your concerns with someone (real or imagined) who will understand.

What causes these emotions of tension is the fear of not coping with your lost investment of things not going your way. What I do when things don't go my way: Realize that I had created an investment, for my self-esteem (ego-energy). I created a situation that if the outcome manifests to my plans, then I will be validated. I will get what will make me feel okay, worthy, blessed, right, loved,... Because of the lost investment, and validation due, my self-esteem feels threatened. Plus, not having a Plan B (coping strategy) in place, I feel exposed and vulnerable (to possible negative judgment). Now is the time to let go of the situation. I know that I need to accept it. If i do not accept it, I will continue to struggle with it until I do. What helps me to accept the situation? I have a few self-talk cliches such as: "It was not meant to be at this time". This usually means I was not properly prepared, because the definition of good luck is when preparation meets opportunity. Another cliche is: "I am still okay without the outcome". This usually reminds me that deep down I really do not need anything to be okay, because I am already okay, but have forgotten that. Now is the time to accept what I already have, because that is the situation I am in without my planned outcome. For some reason I wanted better, more, of something different than I am in. So I need to be honest and ask myself what it is that I cannot accept. Once I see what it is, it is time to either change it if I can, or accept it. Altered attitudes works very well for most unaccepted circumstances.

The wiring from terminal strips to the D-connectors at the back panel is complete.

Is not awareness what is perceived. Does not something exist that is not yet perceived. Is not infinity (the immeasurable) contain what is so far perceived and what is not yet perceived.

@PetarKa The needs of the other, or others, are seen as outweighing there own need.

One day at a time. Keep it simple. How important is it really? Let go, let God. Easing God Out. What can I do about it now? First things first. Acceptance is the key to serenity. If I won't let go, then don't hang on.

Amazing what changes when something we rely on a daily basis, such as electricity, is no longer there. As you said you get used to it, to some degree. I lived in the bush for a few years without electricity, running water, telephone, or transport. When i did get back to civilization it took me awhile to get used to a toilet again, and I had trouble getting out of lovely hot showers. On a full moon, a few neighbours would walk the few kilometers through the bush to visit me without using a light. They would invite themselves over for dinner, but they always bring lots of fresh vegetables from their gardens. Sometimes they bring musical instruments to play some blue-grass music. Everyday I collected water from a nearby dam and I would split and break up dry fallen wood for fire. many birds would come as soon as they heard the axe or splitter. They would surround me by about 10 yards radius and wait for me to finish so they can get the termites from the split wood. If I didn't produce any be the time I gathered my quota I would seek out an old stump, full of termites, to break open. They were good times. Though I have to admit the town comforts are very good too. Thanks for sharing your thread@Extreme Z7, it brought back some fond memories.

It is very difficult, for some, including me, to control pride. Sometimes one has to be aware of their own pride wanting to exploit itself before realizing that they really do not need to do that to be okay. Other times, one may become aware that they are about to enter the arena for pride, such as a gathering of friends at the cafe'. In this case, they may keep quiet until asked to speak. The best way to keep pride in place is to be aware of its truth. That one's ego will always seek validation to stay in the picture (to be seen). It takes a knack to be seen, yet not to be seen. That is, to be seen but not noticed. Seeing other people propping up their pride can be used as a reminder to not do the same. Ask yourself what changes in you when the need for exploiting your pride arises. Visualize what that feeling, or behaviour is in terms of something easy for you to identify. Have this image imprinted in your mind. Then when the need to be proud arises that image comes to mind, and then you will be reminded to settle back down to that calm humble self. For me it is a rise of urgency, a shift in rising posture and a larger draw of breath. As if getting ready to interject myself into the picture.

@mattstivender Good luck.

Just to remind you that a random act is random. That is, it is not planned. You cannot say I will do a random act of good faith today. This random bit has caught me out a few times, and I didn't come through acting in good faith. It takes some faith to act spontaneously in faith. It also requires to be in awareness and mindfulness of other than self.